Giving Way To Dusk
by HelenahJay
Summary: In Volterra, Alice doesn't catch up to Bella and Edward in time, and they face the Volturi alone. Edward makes a trade for Bella's life, with devastating consequences.  Canon AU.
1. Gasp

"Mean it," I whispered. "Please."

Was it really such a loathsome idea? Would he rather _die_ than change me? I felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach.

"No." Edward's voice is low, dead. Final.

A sob is choking me, caught in my throat. Tears prick at my eyeballs. The room is damp, and my clothes feel icy against my skin.

"I'll give you what you want," Edward says to Aro, stepping forward. The sudden distance between us is like a chasm. I feel myself teetering on the edge. I would give anything in this moment to be able to read his mind.

Aro's ancient face lights up in fascination; his maroon eyes glinting. Jane lets out a hiss, glaring at us in dismay and open hostility. Alec reaches for her hand, but she snatches it away.

"You let her go from here, safely," Edward continues. "You don't follow her, you don't monitor her. You trust what I'm saying; that she will never reveal what she knows."

"And?" Aro's eyebrow arches, his grin a rictus of cold delight.

"And I will stay here, and join the Guard."

No. No, no, no. What is he _doing_? I step toward him, but the tall vampire behind me grasps my arm.

"You will serve this family?" Aro gestures lazily at the vampires gathered around us. "You will pledge allegiance just as every other here in this room has done?"

Caius is scowling fiercely at Edward, leaning forward in his chair as if he might pounce at any second.

"Yes," Edward whispers. "In exchange for Bella's life."

My sob breaks free as I collapse to the floor, kneecaps slamming to the unforgiving stone. I cry out Edward's name, but he doesn't turn around.

Aro claps his ivory hands like a small child. I look up at him, almost blinded by hot tears. I'd thought that nothing would surpass the heartbreak I felt when Edward left me in the forest, but now I'd trade everything for that numbness in place of this searing, shattering pain. He can't stay here. He can't _choose_ these creatures over his family, over me!

Aro gestures dismissively at my crumpled form. "Felix, deliver her to the outside. Heidi should be back soon with the evening meal, and we wouldn't want anyone getting...confused, now, would we?"

Before I know it, Felix has lifted me effortlessly to my feet as I struggle and scream. His cloak tangles around my legs. One preternaturally strong arm closes across my chest, holding my arms to my side. It becomes agonizing to draw breath, but I continue to cry out. "Edward! _EDWARD_!"

Aro sighs, "Not like that, obviously. She'll frighten our guests."

Edward's shoulders are slumped, his hands balled in fists at his side. _Why won't he turn around_?

Felix's cold fingers close around my throat. Already gasping through my tears, my air supply disappears all together. My lungs burn; my heart pounds. I am still screaming Edward's name inside my head, wishing with everything I have that he could hear my thoughts. And then the fight starts to go out of me, and all I can feel is the icy steel of Felix's grip as I get swallowed whole by the darkness.


	2. Weep

"Bella! BELLA! Wake up. Come on, please."

I swim back up to consciousness, blinking my eyes in the low light, taking inventory. Everything hurts. My limbs feel bruised and aching, and breathing takes too much effort. It feels like almost drowning all over again. I recognize the voice, but I don't want to.

"Bella, honey. Come on."

Alice is crouched over me, her expression painted with fear. She brushes my hair back of my face, where it feels plastered with sweat and tears.

"I need to move you, Bella. Is anything broken, do you think? I don't want to hurt you." There's an anxiety to her voice I've never heard before.

We seem to be in an alley, and I'm slumped against a stone wall, smooth cobblestones under my hands. The noise of music and revelry filter through from the square outside. Volterra. God, I'm still in Volterra. I try and push myself up on weak arms. Alice immediately lunges forward to help, lifting me gently to my feet and keeping her arm around me to steady me. I lean heavily against the wall.

She runs cool fingers across my throat, and I can only imagine the bruises Felix has left there. Swallowing seems an effort. Alice is aghast. "That thug just dropped you here, at my feet. God, Bella did he do this? What happened? Where is Edward? Oh, your throat. Bella!"

I feel a wave of nausea and gag briefly.

"Oh, I should have been there! I... was too slow, the car...and then the police...I've only managed to see flashes. I've been going crazy. Bella, what happened? Please, can you talk? Tell me you're okay. _Please_!"

The tears come back, welling up in my ravaged throat and burning my eyes. All of this is real. _Edward_.

"Bella, he's still alive. I can see that! They didn't kill him! It's okay."

She draws me into a hug, and I collapse against her tiny frame, my shoulders shaking with silent tears. Tiny Alice, still so strong despite it all. Holding me up when nothing else in this world can. She lets me cry, rubbing soothing circles on my lower back, and murmuring meaningless reassurances in my ear.

When I draw back, she smoothes cool fingers across my cheeks, wiping away my tears and calming the angry, swollen flesh. She waits, with a patience I have never seen from Alice, for me to regain my composure.

"He decided to stay," my voice sounds ragged, broken. Hoarse from screaming.

Alice's hand flies up to her mouth in shock, her eyes wide. "What...what do you mean?" Her eyebrows draw together, and I can see she's searching for any vision that could prove me wrong. Her expression moves from worry to horror. I don't want to know what she sees.

"He...they made him choose, Alice. They wouldn't let me go unless I was changed."

Alice nods, as if this is not news. "But you _are_ going to be changed, Bella. I've seen it."

I shake my head slowly, pushing back from her embrace. It's all I can do to stand unassisted. I realize I haven't slept in days and my last meal was a mouthful of rubbery eggs before the plane landed in Rome. All this way, all this effort, and for nothing. _Nothing_. _We still lost him_.

"He chose to stay, Alice," I grit out. My mouth is dry, and my legs are still wobbling.

Alice looks as if she is about to protest further, but then she takes in my fragile state. She scoops one arm under and around me, lifting me lightly, and we move swiftly out of the alley and through the crowd, my feet hovering just above the ground. We must look like any number of other drunken festival-goers, supporting each other home. The noise and the robes and masques surrounding us in the square are jarring. In my exhausted state, my eyes keep sliding closed. My nerves are jangling. I feel like I'm buried in a nightmare.

Alice steers me around a corner and unlocks the sleek yellow sports car, sliding me gently into the passenger seat. With the door still open as cover, she kneels and easily snaps a heavy metal clamp off the front wheel. "I had a disagreement with someone about whether I was allowed to park here," she says with a scowl, throwing the twisted metal up onto the footpath, and closing my door. Sinking into the soft leather seat, I press my overheated temple to the cool glass and close my eyes. Alice stays outside on her cellphone, and even though she's whispering for all intents and purposes, I can tell her conversation with Carlisle is agitated. I look out at her in the dark, pacing on the footpath and rubbing at her forehead. She keeps gesturing frantically as if he can see her. Abruptly, she hangs up with an exasperated hiss, and throws the phone at the nearest stone wall. It cracks sharply, pieces flying in all directions.

I blink once and she's sitting in the driver's seat next to me. Her eyes are bright, and she drums her fingers rapidly on the steering wheel, her jaw working in frustration. "Carlisle wants us to come home," she says, staring straight ahead. "He thinks we need to regroup, to plan. And he doesn't want to do it here, right under the Volturi's noses."

She's not making any sense. _Plan for what_? I'm beyond tired, my eyes feel scratchy and swollen even when I close them. Nothing makes sense. Not any of this - Edward not beside me, Alice's concerned face, the tension I can feel spinning around the interior of this stolen car.

Alice fires the car into life and weaves through the crowds, sitting heavily on the horn. We are soon speeding through the Italian countryside. Alice changes gears with vicious slams that make me think the car might not survive her wrath. I want nothing more than to sleep. I close my eyes and hope.

**.x.**

**This story will have around 20 chapters, and they'll all be short and snappy. I plan to post one a week, on Sundays all going according to plan. Can't thank my amazing beta, emmajanepringle, enough. I'm the Sam Seaborn to her Toby Ziegler.**


	3. Fear

In my entire lifetime, nothing has been more difficult than standing my ground as Bella sobs my name. I don't take my eyes off Aro as Felix stifles her cries, swearing to myself that when the time is right, I will tear both of them limb from limb. And then a terrible realization crawls over my skin. Aro will know this. Aro will touch me, and will know every vengeful thought. I'm not safe anywhere any more, not even my own mind.

The heavy wooden doors swing closed behind Felix, and Aro turns back to look at me. There is a long silence, all the more startling after the Bella's agonizing pleas. Not one of the Guard move a muscle, waiting to see what will happen next.

"We'll get you settled in after the meal," Aro finally announces. His tone barely masks his delight, as if I am a long awaited guest, an old friend come to join them for dinner. As if my soul has not just been bargained away in front of them all.

"I won't be partaking, for obvious reasons. I'll hunt, and join you after. I assume there are wild animals _outside _the city limits?" My voice sounds exhausted; my sarcasm falls flat.

Aro pauses, a cautious expression crossing his face as he appraises me.

I sigh. "You know I won't leave, Aro. You would have Bella back here before I had time to even think about it. I'll keep my word; you keep yours."

"Like _father_, like son. Very well, Edward Cullen, I'll take you for a man of honor. Heidi will show you to your quarters when you return."

It helps, immediately, to escape the stifling confines of the Volturi chambers. Above ground the crowds are partying, turning from the day's traditional celebrations to drunken revelry as the sun sinks below the city walls. It feels as though an eternity has passed since I stood here in the piazza ready to end my life. I wonder where Bella is, how she got here, how she got away. Part of me wants to stalk these cobbled streets looking for her, chasing desperately after the scent of her, but it will get me nowhere. I need Aro to trust me if this situation is ever going to change.

Once clear of the city I take off at a sprint toward the Apennines. Hunting in Italy isn't easy, but any further afield and I risk Aro's suspicion. There are wolves in the mountains, and it doesn't take long for me to down several. I pause on a rocky outcrop, wiping blood from my mouth on the back of one sleeve. The temperature has dropped dramatically, and I feel so empty, even having just fed. It seems overwhelming. To have believed in Bella's loss so completely and to then have had her again in my arms, only to lose her once more. And now I'm trapped. I've done what I can to save her, but being here, with these vampires? With no respect for human life. The cruelty; the dispassionate enforcement of the law. It feels like Chicago all over again. I've been a vigilante once, and I swore I'd never go back.

I manage to surprise a boar, and it's enough to slake my thirst for a while. I take off back toward the city at a run.

Heidi meets me in the waiting area on my return, and walks with me down a long side corridor, decorated with priceless Renaissance art.

"You went hunting _animals_?"

I nod. Her eyes are an extraordinary color. She is objectively beautiful, I suppose, but in a chilling way. There isn't an ounce of emotion in her elegant features.

"What a waste of energy," she muses. "You should hunt a more _challenging_ prey."

She stops and opens one of the wooden doors on the left, waving me in ahead of her.

"This is yours," she shrugs, looking around a tastefully appointed room. The furnishings are rich and comfortable but, with no windows, I can't escape the feeling that this is nothing more than a plush cell. "While you're here." She says it in a way that suggests others have been here before me. Others that haven't lasted very long.

I sink to the bed, and start pulling off my boots. Heidi pauses, waiting for something. I don't look up. Her thoughts are vivid enough, and she doesn't seem to need any encouragement. I watch myself through her mind's eye, naked above her, thrusting, touching, and whispering her name. It is nothing new. Tanya's imagination would leave hers for dead.

She waits. I still don't react.

"You're required in the Grand Hall tomorrow morning at nine." Her tone moves from dismissive to icy, as she turns on her heel and stalks out, slamming the door behind her.

By the looks of things, Heidi's not used to disappointment. I don't care. I'm more than used to being the cause.

The shower in the small suite is cramped, but I stay in it until the water runs cold, trying to sort out the events of the day in my head.

Bella is alive. Alive, and in danger, if I don't keep up my end of this Faustian bargain. Days ago, in Rio, I was prepared to crawl back to her. My resolve had crumbled. And then Rosalie called. My world collapsed out from under me with the news that Bella had fallen from those cold, dark cliffs. I swallowed whole the guilt and regret that I was at fault, and the abysmal sense of emptiness that ensued thinking that I outlived her.

But none of it was true. Bella lives. She breathes, and cries, and screams. She loves me. She faced down terror in coming all this way to save me, fronting up to the worst of my kind. And what have I managed to achieve? I've done it all over again, dragged her into the heart of the threat my world presents to her. Exposed her to its masters and villains. My weakness, my _love, _for Bella has once again put her life at risk. I can't ruin this. I can't ruin her. If I do anything in this godforsaken life, I have to keep her alive.

As I step naked back into the main room there is a sharp rap at the door, before it swings open abruptly. Caius strides in, ignoring my scramble to wrap the cloak I'd dropped on the bed around me. His translucent skin and white hair stand out in sharp relief against the midnight velvet of his garments. He is furious; his mind roiling with murderous thoughts.

_I know you hear me. Let us do away with pretence._

He has come alone. I realize that he could end me right now. That this could all have been for nothing. Flush with human blood, he is infinitely stronger than I am.

_The wrong decision was made today. Aro's fascination with your gift has blinded him to the law. The girl should never have been allowed to walk free._

My stone heart clenches in fear and my mind races. Can he have sent someone after Bella? Is my pact with Aro already for nothing? My eyes dart to the doorway behind Caius. I am almost desperate enough to try and make a run for it.

_Still yourself, child. I will not go back on my brother's word._

He scowls at me. There is such venom in his thoughts, such cruelty, that I'm momentarily taken aback. A lifetime with Carlisle has not prepared me for the vicious barbarism, the unbridled power, which seats itself in Volterra.

_Know this. Your loyalty to this house will be unwavering. You will do exactly what is asked of you, whenever it is asked, without question. One hint, the merest...suggestion...that your will is divided, and it will be my great pleasure to not only end your life, but the girl's as well._

Caius bombards me with mental pictures of Bella writhing in pain and torment, blood streaming from her wounds. My mouth falls open in a soundless cry.

_Aro considers you a prize. I consider you a traitor. Your life depends on proving me wrong._

He glides from the room so swiftly I don't have time to react. I sink weakly to the floor and bury my head in my hands, longing for any sort of relief.

There is none.


	4. Choose

**Thank you guys for taking a chance on this, and for leaving such lovely reviews. EJ makes things better. Ser listens to me whine.**

**.x.X.x.**

The Cullens meet us at Sea-Tac. They are an oasis of still calm in the crowded and noisy arrivals lounge. Pale, gorgeous, distinctly out of place. I feel their familiarity, and wrap myself in it like a heavy blanket. It seems selfish. I've destroyed this family, and yet seeing them again is such a comfort. Alice throws herself into Jasper's arms, whispering a flood of endearments into his ear that are too fast for me to understand.

Esme startles me by pulling me into a tight hug, one hand smoothing my dirty hair. I feel self-conscious. I've been flying for days now, and I must reek of plane and stale sweat, but Esme doesn't seem to care. She's pressing her palm against my cheek, and can there really be tears there again? How is that possible?

"Thank you," she says to me, her eyes bright and sincere. "For going all that way, for trying. Thank you for stopping him; for saving his life." She hands me a soft, embroidered handkerchief. I can't even understand why she would own one, let alone have it on her. I focus on this detail to keep myself from looking her in the eye.

I'm shaking my head, and biting hard at my lip. This is all a mistake, a misunderstanding. I take a step away from them. "It's my fault," I murmur.

"No, it's not," says a cool voice behind me. "If there is anyone to blame, it's me."

Rosalie looks as broken as I feel, leaning heavily into Emmett's side. I want to muster up malice; scratch at her flawless skin. She's the one who called him; she told him I was dead. She set this whole appalling chain of events in motion. But all I feel is exhaustion and the heavy sense of inevitability that settled over me in Italy. I can't find any words for Rosalie.

"He's alive, that's all that matters right now," Carlisle says with conviction, steering us toward the exit. "We need to get Bella home. She desperately needs some rest." He sounds every inch the doctor he is, and this is a prescription I don't want to fight. He puts his arm around my shoulders, and I feel tired all the way through to my bones. I'm asleep almost before the Mercedes leaves the parking lot.

The leather of the upholstery is cool against my cheek, and before I know it, Alice is shaking me awake. It takes a minute for me to understand where we are, to remember everything that has happened. My house - Charlie's house - looks familiar and different at the same time. The lights on the front porch are on. Charlie's cruiser has a light layer of snow covering it.

Esme breaks me from my trance. "Time to go in, sweetheart."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Alice asks.

I take a deep breath and shake my head. This is my dad, this is my problem. This is Charlie.

"I'll be okay. Just, if you don't hear from me in three days, promise you'll work your magic?"

Alice gives me a tight smile. I open the door, and walk up to the stoop. For one moment I regret all of it. Moving to Forks, trying to make a life here, discovering the world is not at all what I thought it was. I was happy enough in the desert sun. I miss Renee. I would never have met Edward, but maybe that would have been better. I don't know, I'm too tired to be objective.

Charlie's disappointed face is worse than any lecture or punishment. There's a hurt behind his eyes, and I know that he's thinking about every morning over the last six months when he tried to get me to buck up before school, and every night he lay awake worrying. He's looking at me, and all he sees is the girl who ran after the boy who broke her heart. I fix my eyes on my toes, tears scratching at my eyeballs. I wonder how much of me he sees in himself. He loved Renee, and she left. Did he try to get her to stay? Did she refuse? Would he go back to her, even now? I realize I know so little about my father, and my heart feels hollow.

All I do know is that Charlie trusted me, and I let him down, and I need to face this myself. And so here we sit, on opposite sides of the room. No sound except the hum of the refrigerator coming from the kitchen, the silence stretching awkwardly between us.

I start to stand up. "I'll make some dinner. When was the last time you had a good meal? You probably haven't been watching your sodium intake, have you?"

Charlie stops me in my feeble attempt to escape. "You're grounded, obviously."

I nod, without looking up. It doesn't really matter. He can send me to Florida, I no longer care. There isn't anything here for me now. He deserves better than me, anyway.

"Other than the time you'll spend on the Rez."

I glance up with a start.

"You need some structure, Bella. A routine. You're going to go to the Black's every day, straight after school."

I shake my head slowly, thinking about the look of disgust on Jake's face as Alice and I drove away. It was only three days ago, but it feels like I've lived a lifetime since then.

"You'll do your homework, and you'll help Emily with the little ones. And you'll be home by dinner."

I rub at the back of my neck, a seemingly permanent crick having settled in on the plane, and I have to catch myself before I dislodge Alice's scarf and reveal the nasty ring of bruises Felix has left around my throat. Nothing would make Charlie believe Edward was not somehow responsible for those.

"I'll do whatever you want," my voice sounds low and resigned. There's a pause.

"Is he back?" Charlie doesn't look at me.

I stare at the worry lines across Charlie's forehead. I put those there, I realize, guilt pooling in my gut. He looks like he's aged ten years. When did this happen? Did I do this to him? Yet another thing I've missed in my selfish stupor.

"No. The others might be, Esme hates L.A., but Edward's doing a semester abroad." How easily the lies continue. To think that once he could read my face like a book. If Charlie has aged this much, what do I look like in the mirror?

Charlie's forehead crinkles into a scowl. I can see he wants to ask me questions, but he really, really doesn't want to talk about Edward, or even say his name. I want to do something, to say something. To make Charlie understand that it's okay, and I'm not going back to the dark place I was in when Edward left, that I won't let him do that to me again.

"I'm serious; I'll go to the Rez. I'll keep my grades up. This isn't...this isn't a setback. I thought I could do something, and it turned out I was wrong."

Charlie's shoulders slump a little as he exhales. "It's either this or military school, Bells."

Only part of me thinks that he's joking.

Later, as I am boiling water for pasta, he puts a pre-paid cell phone on the kitchen counter beside me. "You'll call, as soon as you get to the Black's. I don't hear from you, I'll be calling you."

I realize then that Charlie's not joking at all. If I want to stay in Forks, this is my last shot.


	5. Wait

I wake with a start and the certain realization that I'm not alone.

"Don't freak, it's only me," Alice whispers from near the window. My heart sinks. In the moment before she spoke, I wanted more than anything to believe it was him. I wonder when people watching me sleep from the window became normal.

"What are you doing here?" I rub sleep from my eyes as I sit up. The jet lag is still messing with me, and I feel dreadful. Disoriented and woozy.

"We're having a family meeting. I...we thought you should be there."

I'm already out of bed and hauling on my jeans. Apparently the jet lag isn't so bad. "Charlie?"

"It's okay. He's out cold; I don't see him waking up anytime soon. I'll keep an eye out of course."

I wrap my arms tightly around Alice's neck, anchoring myself to her back, pressing my face into her hair and closing my eyes. The sensation of unnatural speed still flips my stomach. The last time I did this it was with Edward, and I was laughing. Now I am just thankful Alice can run this fast.

The Cullens are gathered around the dining table when we reach the house, with the exception of Emmett who is pacing back and forth like a caged bear.

"We are _wasting time_," he grits out as I slide from Alice's back and Esme gives me a quick hug, pulling out a chair for me beside her. Rosalie's face is buried in her hands. Emmett slaps the wall in frustration, causing a painting to jump off its hook and fall to the floor with a crash. For some reason, I wonder how much the destroyed painting is worth. "We need to go _now._We need to get on a plane, go over there, and teach those Italians a lesson or two."

I cast a quick look at Jasper, wondering why he isn't altering this, or at least calming the room. Even I can feel the tension. He doesn't meet my eyes, instead staring fiercely at Carlisle.

"Sit down." Carlisle's tone is icy. He doesn't even glance in Emmett's direction, but Emmett does as he's told.

"What do you see now?" Carlisle asks Alice, clearly not for the first time.

A pained expression flits across Alice's delicate features. She schools her face back to neutral. "Bits and pieces, nothing concrete, and always changing. Sometimes he's in Italy for a long time, sometimes he comes back, sometimes...terrible things happen. I've never...Carlisle, there's never been such uncertainty before. I've never felt so...chaotic."

Carlisle turns to me. "Tell us about Victoria." I am startled by the change in topic, but try to answer as best I can. I gloss over the details, the heartbreak. I fudge why I was in the clearing in the first place, though I can't meet any of their eyes as I remember _our_place. Rosalie and Esme gasp when I describe Laurent finding me there.

"I _told _you it was a mistake," Jasper interrupts without warning. "We _never_should have left here. Look at what happened to her!"

His irritation floods out across the table like a wave.

"It wasn't your fault," I start, but Alice places her hand on top of mine.

"It's time for everyone to speak the truth, Bella. None of us left here because we wanted to."

I look around the table in confusion. The expressions on their faces are regretful, apologetic.

"I don't understand." There is so much I don't understand, it seems.

"Bella, Edward made a decision." Carlisle's voice is pained. "He believed, wrongly as it turned out - but with all his heart, you must understand - that you would be safer without him in your life. Without _us _in your life. He loved you too much to put you at risk from our kind ever again."

Carlisle's not making any sense. I shake my head trying to clear it. "No. No, he didn't love me. He...No. He made that clear. He told me..."

Alice gives my hand a small squeeze. "He left because he loves you; he tried to die in Italy because he couldn't bear to exist when he thought that you didn't. He chose to stay to save your life. He loves you, Bella. You're his other half. His reason."

I want to believe her, to accept somehow that this whole long nightmare has been one selfless act of love. But it doesn't ring true. No one who loved me would have left me collapsed helpless in grief on the forest floor that day. No one who loved me would have turned their back on me in Volterra. Wanting to protect me, that I can believe. Edward has always acted out of a chivalrous sense of obligation. But not love. This isn't love. Someone like Edward could never love someone like me. If nothing else, I've learned this much.

"Whatever his reasons," I manage finally after a long silence, "whatever any of your reasons, it doesn't matter now. Laurent didn't hurt me. The wolves protected me."

There is a sudden splintering snap, and Esme looks reproachfully at Emmett, who is clutching the wooden arm of his dining chair in one hand. His expression is thunderous.

Carlisle sighs.

"Bella, wolves - particularly young wolves like Jacob - are very dangerous. They're extremely unpredictable. They can't necessarily control how and when they change form."

I think of the terrible scar across Emily's beautiful face.

"Jake won't hurt me," I claim, with a certainty I don't feel. "None of the wolves will."

Carlisle sighs, rubbing at his forehead. His flawless features look tired, strained.

"Bella, I think I need to speak to these wolves of yours. If Victoria is around here somewhere, and we pick up her scent,we need to deal with her. The last thing we need is the wolf pack thinking she is one of us. Can you arrange it?"

I think about how much Jake hates me right now. How much he despises this family that I love. I nod slowly. I will have to be at the Rez this afternoon, after all. Maybe Sam will see reason, even if Jake won't.

"What will you do about Edward?" I want to get back to the important things.

"There's nothing we can do, Bella. I know Emmett wants to take the bull by the horns, but the Volturi are too dangerous. They would see us coming before we made it to the city limits, and Edward would be dead long before we could do anything. They have myriad gifts at their disposal. I believe you may have met some of them."

I think about Jane, and the way Edward writhed on the stone in agony before me.

Rosalie gets up from the table abruptly and leaves the room. Emmett looks torn, but he gets up to follow her.

"We just have to trust Edward," Carlisle continues. "Aro will know his every move. We can't expect to hear from him until he has found a way to come home. In the meantime we need to deal with Victoria."

I don't know how to trust Edward anymore. I don't even know how to trust myself.

Silence reigns around the table. I try and fail to stifle a yawn. It feels like a betrayal.

"Alice, please take Bella home to bed," Esme murmurs. I try to protest, but I really am exhausted. Esme walks us to the door, and grasps my hand briefly. "Don't worry, Bella. We're not going anywhere just yet." Her tone is reassuring, but all I hear is the short-term promise, and even after Alice tucks me back into bed, I manage only fitful sleep.

My dreams are full of red - hair, blood, and snow.


	6. Learn

The Grand Hall has lost much of its drama, now that I'm no longer trying to end my life or save Bella's. The Guard mill around, their thoughts noisily clamoring in my direction. Suspicion, mostly. Contempt for my request to die, disdain for my defence of a mere human.

It's clear that my gift makes Aro nervous, even now he has it tucked firmly under his wing. He works hard to keep his thoughts light, distracted, like a delighted child. He doesn't always succeed, and when he slips, a flicker of irritation shoots toward me like a lightening bolt.

I do my best not to react at all. If he thinks I'm not paying attention, he might relax a little, eventually let his guard down. It's not much of a plan, but so far it's all I have.

In as much as there is a routine in Volterra, it seems to revolve around gathering intelligence. Every day pairs of Guards depart or return from different parts of the world. Some reports are banal: nomads who have settled in a particular town or city; new covens forming. Others require further monitoring or action. Newborns who are poorly mentored. Vampires who have little regard for secrecy. Within the first two weeks I am there, three unfortunates suffer swift justice on the stone floor before me. Demetri deals with two others in Prague.

I realize how sheltered we have been, living Carlisle's way of life. Exposed to the true levels of barbarism in my kind is a shocking experience. It leaves me depressed and desperately homesick for my family. I long to make contact with them, but the risks are too high. Aro makes a point of taking my hand at the end of each day. There can be no surreptitious phone calls or emails; nothing to give him any suggestion that my dedication to being here is anything less than absolute. The illusion of loyalty is my only protection.

And I discover quickly that this illusion is critical to keeping the hope of rejoining my family alive. I discover this as I come to understand Chelsea. Her gift seems ephemeral at first. I watch as her thoughts range over the Guard each day, touching lightly at any weaknesses or points of conflict. Perceived slights and resentments disappear. Feelings of loyalty and brotherhood surface. Peace reigns among the Guard.

It's the limitations of Chelsea's gift that take me a while to grasp. She can strengthen and weaken the bonds between people, decimating covens by causing them to turn on one another. Binding the Guard to the Volturi. I wait, day after day, for her touch to transform my feelings for Aro from anything but masked loathing and distrust.

All I feel is apathy.

Each morning, as I approach the Grand Hall, my anxiety surges. I am terrified that when I lock eyes with Aro I will suddenly feel trust and commitment. But it doesn't happen. If anything, I find myself caring slightly less about these ancient relics and their schemes. It takes me days to realize that Chelsea can only strengthen and weaken _what is already there_. It's a relief at first, until it dawns on me that while she can't force me to love Aro, she can certainly make my hatred dissipate. And she can cause my feelings for those I _do _love to wane.

She can make me forget Bella.

It's subtle, but it's there. Each day the desire to make contact with home is a little weaker. I lie in my room each night trying hard to recall every detail of their faces, the sound of their voices. Alice's giggle. Rosalie's arched eyebrow. Esme's hugs. A strand of Bella's hair drifting across her face as she sleeps. Desperately clinging to these tiny memories. I know that I'm not going to win this battle over the long term, but right now it's all I can do.

Since confronting me that first night, Caius has rarely made an appearance, spending most of his time at a villa in the hills outside Volterra with Athenadora. On the few occasions I come across him within the city, his mind still fills with resentment over Aro's decision to spare Bella's life. Caius' cruelty, I realize, is not to be understimated.

Marcus, on the other hand, is something of a revelation. Quiet, patient, and fiercely intelligent, he spends a most of his time in the library. It is the one place within the Volturi's labyrinthine chambers that feels like an oasis, filled with rare books and manuscripts that would be the envy of any serious collector. It helps me to feel calmer, to clear my head, away from the bloodlust and carnage of the main chambers. Marcus and I are often there at the same time. He never says anything, but his thoughts reveal that he is intrigued by me, and fascinated by the strength of my relationship with Bella.

"Tell me about Didyme." It is late afternoon, and warm sunlight spills in from the high turret windows above us. Marcus looks up abruptly at the sound of my voice. His ancient features barely register the surprise I hear in his thoughts.

"So," he says quietly after a long pause. "The one who listens has a tongue after all."

"I am new here," I shrug, closing the book of Greek poetry in front of me. "It would seem imprudent not to take time to understand my surroundings."

"Perhaps also imprudent to rummage around in the memories of others." He raises his eyebrows at me, but his thoughts are not offended or at all threatening.

"She was very beautiful, the way you recall her. I would have liked to have met her."

Marcus' cloudy gaze softens, and his mind fills with images of his wife and their life together. I realize he is doing this deliberately, introducing her to me in the only way that he can. Their love feels immense, all encompassing. The pain of her loss is still palpable, even after all this time.

"How did you lose her?"

In his memory, he is running toward the sounds of a fight taking place in a forest of dense conifers, panic and fear overtaking his thoughts. There are screams and the wrenching sounds of dismemberment, the acrid smell of burning vampire flesh. Marcus is running so fast the landscape is a blur, and even in this recollection there is only the pinpoint focus of getting to his mate as fast as he can. Centuries have not dulled any aspect of this memory for Marcus, and as he bursts into the clearing and the scene of massacre before him, I feel my own heart leap in my throat.

The Guard are surrounding by the dead and dying. Jane and Alec are throwing limbs onto a massive bonfire, from which curling waves of purple smoke let off a cloying stench. Demetri is snapping the neck of an emaciated looking vampire, dressed like a peasant. Marcus' viewpoint is swinging around the clearing, desperate, despairing. And then Aro steps from the trees, his face a mask of horror and heartbreak, carrying Didyme's limp form in his arms.

Marcus' memories dissolve into total devastation. There is nothing but Didyme's face through a veil of smoke and sadness.

I take a deep breath. The vision clears, and it seems startling to focus again on being here in the library, the visceral scent of the battle giving way abruptly to old books and dust.

"I'm very sorry." The words seem wholly inadequate.

"Our kind do not commit to one another readily. When we do, some hearts are tied together with ribbon and others with chain."

He stands, smoothing his robes and closing the book he had been reading.

"You understand this, Edward. Better than most."

He sweeps from the room. I slump back in my chair, exhausted, empty and aching for Bella.

.x.X.x.

**Thank you so much for your lovely reviews. I love hearing what you think of this take on canon, even if most of you are finding a bit sad at the moment. Hang in there!**


	7. Mend

Jessica's eyes nearly bug out of her head first period when she sees that some of the Cullens are back.

'WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?' she scribbles on a scrap of graph paper, shoving it across at me.

I let out a humorless snort. As if I know.

It's tempting to just tune out her questions, the teacher, the world around me. It all seems pretty pointless now. Who needs trig, really, in the scheme of things? I sigh, and try and shake myself out of it. I am not going down that path again. I am here, and Charlie's here, and this is the life I have. I almost wasted it once, and even if it's not worth much, I'm not wasting it again.

Not without trying.

Alice seems at a loss as she sinks into the seat next to me in the cafeteria at lunch.

"We argued, a lot. God, everyone was shouting. Even Esme, and she _never_shouts."

The dark circles under her eyes stand out in stark relief against Alice's pale skin.

"Bella, I told Carlisle what we talked about, on the plane."

God. A lifetime ago. Flying through an endless night, begging and pleading with Alice to turn me. My heart stutters and races at the thought. How much has changed. What use is eternity with no certainty? Could I really give up everything to bring Edward home, only to risk being on my own all over again? Forever?

Alice places one cold hand briefly on mine. I don't want her to ask. I don't want this to be the answer. It can't be the answer.

"I'm sorry, Bella. It was the one thing we agreed on. Carlisle maintains there would be no guarantee Aro would honor the bargain. Esme doesn't believe you should make the decision under these circumstances. Rose, well. Rose has her own views. And I just _can't _… Bella, I can't see. I can't _know_. And I won't let something so irreversible happen until it's clearer."

I should feel relief. Instead it feels like some irreversible _has_happened. Like something intangible has just slipped through my fingers. I can't look at Alice.

Jessica and Angela join the table in a noisy rush of chatter about prom. Jess is trying her hardest not to stare at Alice, who is pushing the leaves of her salad around with her fork. My head is pounding.

"So, will you come?"

I realize with a start that Jessica is looking for an answer from me. She rolls her eyes at my blank expression, but Angela takes pity on me, "To Seattle, next weekend. To look for dresses."

"I can't. I'm grounded."

Alice swivels to look at me, confused and worried. Her gift always gave me a sense of comfort, certainty. Now it seems that there's no real protection from the future after all.

"I...took an unauthorized road trip with Alice. Charlie bugged out a little. It's no big deal," I tell Jessica, trying to make it sound as boring as possible. She pauses, as if she's about to ask more questions, but is torn by finding Alice too intimidating. Mike and Ben stroll up then, and I'm more than relieved to be taken out of the spotlight.

"Okay, well. You'll be stuck with whatever you can buy online I guess", she shrugs. She turns back to Angela and tries to engage Mike in their conversation about asymmetric necklines. Angela gives me a small, sympathetic smile.

As we head out of the cafeteria, Alice tugs me to one side urgently.

"I don't see you being grounded, Bella. What does this mean?"

"You won't, I guess. I have to spend all my spare time on the Rez."

Alice's jaw drops. "With the WOLVES? Those mutts? Bella, you can't be serious!"

I shrug, opening my locker and hauling out the textbooks I need for the afternoon. "There's no way around it. Even if I thought the wolves were a danger to me, which they're not. I can't let Charlie down again."

Alice's features curl up in a mixture of concern and disgust.

"Maybe if I talk to him...Bella, he can't make you do what he wants any more. I mean, I know you love him, but..."

"No." The locker door slams louder than I mean it to. I lean against it with a sigh. "Alice, I know you mean well, and you want to keep me safe. You...all...want to keep me safe. You're going to have to trust me on this. The wolves can protect me from Victoria, they took Laurent apart easily. I have to do what Charlie wants this time. I owe it to him."

Jasper comes up behind Alice, and wraps an arm about her waist. She melts back into him, and I can see him dissipate the cloud of anxiety surrounding her. "Everything okay?"

"It will be," I manage, with a certainty I don't really feel. "I'll see you guys later."

After school finishes, I drive straight to the Reservation, and as promised, I call Charlie as soon as I get there. He asks to speak to Emily, and the sinking realization that he trusts me about as far as he can throw me is almost more than I can stand. She promises to send me home with fish fry and hands me back the phone.

I help one of Jacob's younger cousins with his spelling homework, and then Emily and I chop vegetables for dinner in companionable silence. She has a country station on low volume and there's something about the warm kitchen and the music that makes me miss my mother. Maybe this whole idea is crazy; maybe it's time to give up on the Pacific Northwest and the monsters that go bump in the night.

"Charlie will come around, you know."

I suppose that she's right. I just need to prove to him that I'm not about to disappear again. But I don't know if that's enough. I don't know whether regaining Charlie's trust is enough of a reason to stay.

"It was hard for him, last time. With you so upset. He doesn't want that to happen again."

I exhale with a sad huff. "It's not like last time, Emily."

"Maybe not," she says quietly, as she rolls out the pastry in front of her. "But how is he to know? How is anyone to know?"

I set my knife down and look at her. It feels like we're not really talking about Charlie anymore.

"I'll finish the pie," she says, after a long pause. "Maybe you could head out to the barn."

My stomach sinks. I knew there was no chance of avoiding Jake indefinitely, but facing him straight away seems particularly daunting.

"He doesn't want to see me."

"Day and night cannot dwell together, Bella. You need to decide who your friends are, and who your enemies are."

I shake my head in resignation, wiping my hands on the apron as I untie it. "You, of all people, should know it's not that easy."

Jake is crouching on the floor of the barn, tinkering with something on one of the bikes. The sight of it causes a pang of recognition and sorrow. I'd give almost anything to go back a few weeks. The two of us were almost happy here, with the smell of grease on his hands and the straw underfoot. He doesn't look up.

"This wasn't my idea." He sounds angry, defensive.

"I know."

"I'd sooner he sent you to Florida. The leech wouldn't be able to stand the sun."

I don't know if he means Edward or Victoria. Or Alice, for that matter. I sit down on a wooden crate on the other side of the bike, tucking one foot up underneath me and picking at my shoelace.

Neither of us says anything. The only sound is the wrench twisting, probably with more force than needed.

"Jake, I..."

"Don't." He cuts me off abruptly, sinking back onto his heels and looking up at me with a devastated expression. "I don't want to hear it. I know all that I need to. When it came down to it, after everything he put you through, you were still prepared to drop everything to go to his side."

"His life was in danger."

"_YOUR_ life was in danger!" Jacob spits back in frustration. "_It_ _still is._ And where is he? Is he here to protect you?"

I want to leap to Edward's defense, but instead my eyes burn with hot tears. Jacob drops the wrench immediately and strides around the bike to crouch beside me, dragging me into a hug.

"Don't...don't cry," he sighs, stroking my hair as I bury my face in his chest. "I don't ever want you crying again. God, Bella. What he's put you through..."

I shake my head, gasping in helpless sobs. It's as if all the shock and adrenaline of the last few days has worn off and I can suddenly feel every last nerve-ending fire with pain.

"It's okay," Jake soothes, kissing my forehead softly. "It's gonna be okay."

I've never wanted to believe anything more.

**.x.X.x.**

**Thanks to acciobourbon for the rec over at ADF, and for the other loyal readers leaving reviews week after week. You guys are amazing.**


	8. Run

"So they're back?"

Jacob hands me a rag he swears is clean, and I blow my nose noisily. I wipe my eyes on the back of my sleeve. I must look like a horror show. Crying always makes my face blotchy and red and swollen.

"For now." My voice sounds thick and strangled. "They want to deal with Victoria. But I don't think...I mean, I think once that's done, they'll leave again." Even saying the words out loud creates an awful ache in my chest.

Jacob snorts. "We don't need them for that."

"What are you talking about?" I snap, bone-tired and in no mood for his posturing. "She's dangerous. We need her gone. Surely the _more _people who are trying to make that happen, the better?"

"She's one of _them_, Bella! When are you going to understand this? They're not _people_and they're dangerous. All of them. We can't trust them to take care of their own."

"But that's _exactly_ what they did! Jake, they killed James to save me. That's what started all of this. That's _why_ Victoria is here! They're not like other vampires." I shudder, just thinking about the seething evil of Volterra. "Believe me. I've met other vampires."

Jake kicks at the straw under his shoe, flexing his fingers in frustration. I think about Carlisle's warning. How easy it would be for Jake to lose it and phase right here in front of me. He's so close I can feel the heat coming off him, as if his anger was a tangible, physical thing.

"Look, just meet with them," I plead. "Hear them out. Carlisle just wants to talk. No one wants to breach the treaty."

"We'll meet your cold friends, Bella." I spin to look at the barn door, where Sam is leaning. His arms are crossed and his tattooed biceps look enormous. He seems bigger and bigger every time I see him. Jacob scowls, and hurls the wrench at his toolbox. It misses and scatters across the bench noisily.

Sam gives him a pointed look. "We will only discuss the matter of the redhead. There will be no change to the treaty or to the boundary lines. Tomorrow at midnight. In the clearing where we killed the leech."

I nod gratefully, getting to my feet. Jake has his back to me now, and his shoulders are rising and falling as he struggles for control.

"I'll let Carlisle know. Thank you, Sam."

He doesn't respond, his worried gaze fixed firmly on Jacob. I think about saying something further, about reaching out to catch Jake's arm. To try and explain, to let him know it's going to be okay.

"You should leave, Bella. It's time for you to go home." Sam's voice is cold and brooks no argument. I tug the sleeves of my hoodie down over my hands nervously, casting a final look back at Jacob, and leave the barn.

I call Alice from the truck as I drive back to Forks. "Tell Carlisle that Sam agreed to meet you tomorrow at midnight."

"Sam?"

"He's the Alpha. The other wolves will do as he says."

"God, Bella. I just hate you being out there. I hate you being around them, and I can't stand you being out of my sight. It's not safe."

I drum my fingers impatiently on the steering wheel.

"None of this is _safe,_ Alice. I have a vengeful vampire trying to kill me. Can we just agree that this is how it _is_for now?"

She sighs. It's strange. I was so grateful to see her only a few short days ago, but so much has changed in the interim. I realize how frustrated I am, not only with my own powerlessness, but also with the Cullens' seeming impotence. I want Edward home, and safe, and surrounded by the people he loves. Alice can't make that happen. None of them can.

"I'll talk to you later," I manage, snapping the phone shut.

Charlie is waiting in the kitchen for me when I get back to the house. He's cleaning his gun, but I know. I'm still being measured, assessed. Like a suspect. He's still trying to work out if I'm about to fold in on myself again. Crumple, like last time.

"Emily sent us fish fry," I say, dropping the oily paper bag onto the counter, leaning back on my hands.

"How was it?" he asks, not looking up, concentrating on the barrel in front of him.

"Fine." I shrug noncommittally. "You want me to heat this?"

"I ate at the station."

"Well, I have homework." I shove the bag into the refrigerator, closing it a little more forcefully than necessary and heading straight up to my room. The air feels stale and close, and as I crack the window I can't help but run my hand slowly across the sash, thinking of every time Edward slipped in this way to be with me.

In the dark, just at the edges of the tree line, I can make out the enormous silhouette of a wolf. Whoever it is is taking a dreadful risk being this close to Charlie and his gun. Which means it can only be Jacob.

I consider the open window, and my own frustration with everyone I know making decisions for me. The tree looks close enough. I tug on a warmer jacket and open the door to my bedroom to listen. The Seahawks are playing and the game is just starting. Charlie will be staying put for at least an hour. The night air is crisp, and when I swing my feet out over the sill, the tree suddenly doesn't seem as near as I thought. My courage is starting to curdle in my stomach when I hear a howl in the distance. It spurs to me action, and I grip the nearest solid-looking bough, swinging into the trunk. My hands are scratched by the bark, and it stings more than I expected, but I climb quickly down, glad to be back on solid ground.

I stalk across to the tree line, spoiling for an argument. I'm surprised when Quil emerges from the forest, shirtless despite the cold, his feet bare.

"Are you crazy?" he gasps at me. "What if you'd slipped?"

"What are you doing here?"

He runs a hand through his hair, looking anywhere but at me. His dark eyes dart toward the house, back to the trees. I wonder who else is around. If this is Jake's stupid idea or Sam's.

"It's not safe, Bella. I need you to go back inside."

It's like something snaps inside me. I am so sick and tired of everyone making these pronouncements about my _safety_. "Screw you. You don't get to creep around my house like this without telling me. What's going on?"

Quil looks torn. I think back to when I first met these boys, out at First Beach. God, so much has changed. So much innocence lost.

"Look, I've had enough of people keeping secrets, whatever their motives." The light changes behind me and I spin around. Charlie has turned on the lights in the kitchen, probably making a half-time snack. If he finds us out here, I'm toast. I start jogging without thinking, along the path through the trees away from the house.

"Bella!" Quil hisses behind me in a noisy whisper. I pick up my pace, and hear him curse and start to come after me. I run faster. The trail is wet and uneven, and there isn't enough light to really see where I'm going, but the cold night air is flooding my lungs and I feel a rushing sense of freedom turning my back on him, on everyone.

It only lasts for a second.

Suddenly there is a crash behind me, and a blur of movement in front of me, and before I can react all the air is knocked from my lungs and I'm falling. The ground rushes up, frozen stones hitting me in the back and cold fingers grasping painfully around my throat. Victoria's red eyes gleam, a sickening look of triumph across her pale face. She presses me into the ground effortlessly with one hand, holding the other up at Quil who is panting and snarling in his animal form. "If you move," Victoria sneers at him, "she dies." Quil's rumbling growl is deafening. He steps forward briefly, one paw reaching tentatively toward me, but hesitates. He's only a few feet away, his breath rising in clouds from his snout, his jaws snapping. I can see the torment and indecision in his eyes from here. Victoria's grip tightens on my neck, and I can't breathe. There's nothing but cold, and pain, and the spill of Victoria's bright red hair. My fingers clutch helplessly at the snow under me.

I close my eyes. I don't want to see her glinting teeth. I wish I couldn't feel her icy breath. I think about Edward, so far away. I wonder if he'll be able to leave Italy once he learns I've died. At least he can't blame himself for this.

I'm feeling faint, light headed, and then it's as if a tornado blows over me. Noise, and force like thunder. Roaring, loud and impossibly hot. Victoria's death-grip disappears from my throat in a cloud of shrieks and snarls as a giant wolf leaps from the trees and slams her bodily across the trail. They disappear from sight and I struggle up onto weak elbows, as Quil leaps after them to join the fray.

There is a sharp pain in my arm, and it takes effort to get to my feet. There is a sickening crunch from a few feet away and I cry out in fear. Then my worst nightmare: a shotgun blast.

Charlie.

I scramble off the track and into the trees, toward the house. My heart is pounding in my ears and my breathing is ragged and loud. Another shot. I reach the tree line. There's no sign of Charlie, and the front door to the house stands open, warm light glowing from inside like a haven.

I'm frozen with indecision. My father is somewhere nearby, putting himself in mortal danger. He may have killed Quil; I have no idea if the wolves can survive gunshots. And Victoria.

Victoria is out there.

All I can taste is bile.

I burst onto the lawn and start to scream. If Victoria has taken Charlie, then she can have me too. "DAD! _DAAAAAAAAADDDDDDD!_"

For an impossibly long moment I hear nothing, and then...

"Bella? Bella I told you to _stay upstairs_!"

He emerges from the trees a few feet to my right, and I run towards him, wrapping my arms around his neck. He hugs me tightly with one arm, the other pointing his gun away at the ground. He smells like gun oil, and beer, and I revel in the illusion of protection, whimpering in relief.

"Shhh, it's okay. You should have stayed indoors." He pulls back and looks at me, smoothing my hair. His face clouds. "Why are you wet?"

"You were _shooting _at something, Dad! I ran out here, and I..." I gesture helplessly at the icy ground. "I can't stay on my feet when I'm trying to _walk _in a straight line."

His expression softens into concern. "You were really scared, huh? Look at you. I'm sorry. It was just a wolf is all, nothing to worry about." Charlie's a terrible liar.

"Did you..." I don't want to know. There are tears welling up in my eyes.

"No. It was moving too fast. I'll get some of the guys from the Rez here tomorrow, and we'll see if we can track it. Not safe having them coming this close to town."

I collapse against Charlie in exhaustion and fear.

"Come on. That's enough excitement for one night. Get inside and get dry."

I look over my shoulder as he guides me back to the house. The forest is silent and dark.


	9. Bond

**So sorry to miss last week's chapter, real life intervened. We're back on track now, and there shouldn't be any more delays! Thanks for all your reviews, you really make me so excited to keep posting this.  
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><p>Charlie stows his gun with a worried expression on his face, and disappears into the other room to call Billy.<p>

I mumble about taking a hot shower as I dash up the stairs, flinging my bedroom window open and peering out into the dark night. I strain to make out the edge of the forest, hoping for movement, for reassurance. Nothing.

I tug off my damp clothes, dumping them in the hamper and looking around for the red sweater I wore to school the day before. I could have sworn I left it lying over the back of my chair, but now there was just a fluffy blue scarf Alice had loaned me. Charlie must have decided to do laundry. No doubt the red sweater will have turned all of his white undershirts a fantastic shade of pink.

I check my phone for the hundredth time. Nothing. The silence is making me frantic. I text Alice: '_Where are you? Can you come here?_'

There is no response.

Charlie calls from the bottom of the stairs, and I hurriedly twist a towel around my head before emerging from my room.

"Bells, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm much warmer now. Thanks Dad. Did Billy...um...is everyone at the Rez okay?"

Charlie gives me a slightly puzzled look.

"It was just a wolf, Bella. Billy and some of the young guys will come tomorrow and we'll see if we work out where it's coming into town from. You should get to bed now. That's enough excitement for a school night."

I wish him a good night and shut my bedroom door. When I turn around I let out a startled gasp. Alice is perched on the end of my bed.

"Crap! Don't SNEAK UP on me like that!"

"I'm sorry, Bella. I just thought I should come as soon as I could."

My frustration snaps into fear.

"What happened? Victoria was...God, Alice! Jacob and Quil were..." I can't get the words out. My tongue trips over itself, desperate for reassurance. Alice leaps up and is at my side in an instant, wrapping her tiny arms around me.

"Shhh, Bella. It's okay. Everyone is okay. Here, sit here, and I'll tell you everything." She draws me back to sit on the bed, and pulls my quilt around me, continuing to stroke my back through the thick fabric.

"After I got off the phone from you this evening, I went to tell Carlisle and the others about meeting the wolves. All of a sudden, I saw Victoria in the forest. The vision was muddied; there were...holes in it. I guess, on account of the wolves."

I think about Jacob's giant form powering over me; the dreadful snarls and shrieks that followed. A shudder runs through me.

"We all ran to where I thought I'd seen her, but my timing was off and she'd got ahead of us, so we began to follow her trail. Too late, I realized she had been heading to you, to your house. The trail was so fresh. God, Bella, I was so worried about you. If she'd hurt you, and I hadn't worked it out in time, I'd never have forgiven myself."

Alice's beautiful face is contorted in pain and concern. I want to comfort her, but I need to know what happened.

"Alice..."

"Sorry, yes. So we ran along the Quileute boundary line. It's like Victoria knew exactly where we could and couldn't go. Suddenly she burst into the stream bed from the other side, with two wolves right behind her. Emmett lunged for her, but she was too fast, and he collided with one of the wolves. All of a sudden there were half a dozen of them snapping and growling, and Rosalie leaped in front of Emmett and we were in this horrible stand-off."

She lets out a little sigh, letting her arm drop from around me and twisting her hands in her lap.

"It took Jasper a few moments to get everyone calmed down. Victoria got away."

I know I should feel the disappointment that she does, but the relief is almost overwhelming. Everyone I care about is alive. That's what matters. Unless...

"Alice, Charlie shot at the wolves. Did he..."

Alice shakes her head. "I don't know. I mean, we all backed away carefully. And Carlisle asked them to honor the meeting tonight. I'm sorry, Bella, I don't know how many there were supposed to be."

There is a thick lump in my throat. I glance at the clock on my desk. It's after 11:00.

"I want to come."

Alice gets to her feet and paces around my room. "I knew you would want to be there. I just...I can't see anything about tonight. It makes me very nervous."

"Alice, this isn't really up for discussion. Victoria had her hands around my throat tonight. My father could very well have shot my best friend without knowing it. And if your family meets the pack without me, there's every chance it ends badly."

Alice huffs in frustration. She knows I'm right, and she has no vision of the future to prove otherwise.

"Besides," I play my trump card, "Victoria is still out there. I am only going to be safe with wolves or vampires. If you're all in the clearing, then that's where I need to be too."

Alice closes her eyes, rubbing at one with the heel of her hand. It is an incredibly human gesture. I think about how exhausted Carlisle looked last night. How broken Rosalie seemed when she met us at the airport. I have always thought of these immortal creatures as being flawless, invincible. But the strain of this is taking a visible toll on all of them.

"All right. Dress warmer, the temperature is falling."

I grab the scarf off my chair, looping it around my neck as I shove my feet into a pair of boots. Alice scoops me up in her arms, and drops out of my window lightly to the ground, absorbing our impact without making any noise. She pauses to let me clamber onto her back and get comfortable before taking off full-speed into the trees. I screw my eyes shut tight, and concentrate on her cool scent to try and keep calm.

When we reach the clearing, the Cullens are already there. Esme hugs me tightly, running her palm along the side of my face as she draws back, as if to make sure I am in one piece.

"I'm so sorry she got so close to you, Bella," Carlisle says quietly, the anguish evident in his voice. He and Edward might not be blood relations, but they have never seemed more similar than in this moment.

"I'm just sorry she got away," Emmett hisses, scuffing at the ground under his foot.

Suddenly the Cullens widen out into a line, staring at the trees on other side of the clearing. Alice stays at my side, clasping my hand loosely, but even she seems tense and poised.

"_Damn,_" Emmett mutters under his breath. "Did you ever see anything like it?"

Esme and Rosalie exchange a wide-eyed glance.

"What is it?" I whisper urgently at Alice, whose mouth has fallen open. "I can't see!"

Then the moonlight catches the glittering, dark eyes of the wolves, as they emerge quietly from the trees. As tall as horses; muscular and powerful. Only Sam has come in human form, the wolves on either side of him forming a protective phalanx. I almost collapse in relief at seeing Jacob's enormous shape at his right hand.

Carlisle takes a slow step forward. "Thank you for agreeing to meet us."

I drop Alice's hand and dash past Carlisle.

"Bella, wait..."

I ignore Carlisle's admonition, crossing the clearing quickly and thrusting my hands into the thick russet-colored fur at Jacob's neck. "Are you okay?" I ask him softly, and then turn to Sam. "Is everyone okay?"

Sam's expression is cautious and cold.

"Charlie's shot grazed Quil, but he was not badly injured. He has already healed." I look over at Quil's dark brown form. His muzzle open, and his tongue lolling to the side, as if to reassure me. I let out a breath that I hadn't known I was holding.

Carlisle clears his throat. I suddenly don't know what to do. I am torn between staying here, pressed against Jacob's warm fur, and returning to Alice's side.

If Carlisle notices my dilemma, he says nothing. "We asked to meet you because we learned that Victoria had returned, and we wanted you to understand that she is not like us." There is a rumble low in Jacob's chest. The wolf on the other side of him paws the ground aggressively. Emmett crouches in response. Exasperation wells up inside me.

I stalk into the middle of the clearing, turning first to face the wolves.

"Listen to me. Carlisle speaks the truth. Victoria _is_a bloodsucker. The kind you have been taught about for generations. She is a danger to the town. She is a danger to me. But this family that faces you is not. Your ancestor, Ephraim Black, made a treaty with this family because he knew they were different."

Sam scowls at me, but says nothing. I turn on my heel to face the Cullens.

"And you, you know that I love you all like family." My voice cracks a little on the word. A family I had hoped to join, once. "But these wolves found me, and cared for me, and _saved _me when you turned your backs and left." All of the Cullens adopt expressions of guilt and regret, even Rosalie.

I turn so that both groups can hear me.

"I know you are natural enemies, but that's a legacy you can overcome. And right now, with this danger so close, I need you to overcome it."

There is a long silence. It is Emmett who finally breaks it.

"I'm...I want to apologize, for crossing the treaty line. I was moving too fast, and I didn't think."

Sam grunts in acknowledgement, and tilts his head slightly. I wonder if he is listening to others in the pack. "We should not have lost focus," he says. "Bella is right. The cold one is more important than the treaty line."

Carlisle gives a small nod. "We are not proposing to set the treaty aside, but we want to work with you to destroy Victoria."

"We do not need the help," Sam says, a note of disdain in his voice, "but we should not undermine each other."

Emmett's shoulders hunch a little, but before I can worry that Sam's attitude will ruin everything, a wave of calm and reconciliation floods across from Jasper.

Sam sighs. "And we do not need you to mess with our minds either. If you want our cooperation, that stops now."

"Fine," Jasper spits, striding forward to the center of the clearing and pulling a large map from his jacket. He crouches on the ground, spreading it out and anchoring the corners with rocks. "Let's stop yammering then and make a plan."

It feels like tight bands around my chest begin to loosen, as Sam comes forward and kneels opposite Jasper. The next hour unfolds in discussion about tactics and strategy. Jasper is in his element as he and Sam run through any number of possible ambushes and traps, Sam pausing frequently to listen to what the wolves around him have to say.

Alice is suddenly beside me. "We should go," she whispers. "You've done what you needed to, and I don't want Charlie to find you gone."

I'm too tired to protest, and give Jacob a small wave as Alice hoists me up and jogs from the clearing.

Alice climbs effortlessly up the tree beside my window, and soon I'm pulling off my boots and stumbling towards the bed. Literally stumbling, as it turns out, my toe catching on something and causing me trip and fall against the mattress. Alice scoops me up in an instant. "Are you okay, Bella? God, you must be so tired."

I shake my head, rubbing at my stubbed toe. I am about to explain that I could sleep for 48 hours straight and still be that clumsy when I see the loose floorboard that is to blame. "See? I'll have to get Charlie to hammer it back down." I press on the board to illustrate my point, and the other end lifts up. "Wait..."

Alice crouches beside me, as I pull the board up, revealing the cache below. Photographs, plane tickets...a CD.

"What is this stuff, Bella?"

The tears flood my eyes, rolling down my cheeks in hot tracks. All this time. I've walked back and forth over these boards, and all this time my things have been right here below me. There was never a _clean break_, I think, my mind whirling and my heart desperate for Edward. He hadn't been able to walk away from me cleanly at all. No wonder it never healed properly.

Alice draws me into her arms, and I sob quietly, the photo of Edward clutched in my hand.

"Hush," she whispers into my hair. "We're going to get him back, Bella. We're going to find a way."


	10. Mercy

"This is a mistake."

Caius' voice is like cold steel. He glares at Aro with unconcealed rage. The air in the Grand Hall seems to disappear in the thick cloud of tension generated between them. Everyone is frozen, even Chelsea seemingly powerless to diffuse the situation.

Aro leans lazily back in his chair, not breaking Caius' stare.

"I disagree, _brother_." His tone is light, but there is no humor in his expression. "Edward has given us no reason to think he should not be trusted. He leaves us every other day to hunt, and returns as promised. He has stood witness here to our justice. What is it that gives you pause?"

Caius doesn't look in my direction.

"He bides his time. You have a hall full of Guards. There is no need to send this _boy_."

"And how would you have him prove himself? Edward's _talent_ is an asset to us all. You would have it wasted?"

Marcus stays silent. His thoughts are of a time and place I do not recognize. His thoughts are of Didyme.

Caius raises his voice. "I would have him use his _talents_ here! There is no place for him in the field. Jane and Alec are _more _than capable."

Venomous pride surfaces in Jane's mind. Alec seems disinterested in the outcome of this argument. He is thinking about the task ahead. A small town in northern Scotland, where the long winter nights have given a pack of ranging nomads leeway to be careless.

"You are too cautious," Aro sneers, dismissively. "Edward will go with them. I will not discuss this further."

Caius springs to his feet. A long silence stretches; no one in the room moves so much as an eyelash, waiting to see what will happen.

"You will regret this," Caius spits, finally. He turns and sweeps from the hall, his robe flowing behind him. His voice is still clearly audible to us all. "_We all will_."

Aro gives a little clap, regaining the attention of the room. "Very well. Jane, you leave tonight."

Jane scowls at me. She appears torn by feeling pleased with Caius' endorsement, and hurt that Aro wants me to go at all.

_We don't need you, and this fascination of Aro's will not last_.

I shrug at her slightly. I will do what I am told; too much depends on it. Something about her thoughts bothers me, though. She is not the first to accuse me of being a 'fascination' for Aro.

It is slightly faster to fly than to swim and run, and so my customary robe is set aside in favor of the dark jeans and pale blue dress shirt that someone has laid out on bed. My passport sits on the side table, returned for the first time since my arrival. I fan the pages, mind racing at the possibilities. We'll be at an airport, with planes leaving in all directions. Can I seize the opportunity to run? My mind fills with thoughts of Bella, but the pictures swim and dissolve and I can't grasp them. All I can see is Caius' poisonous expression in their place.

The flight from Rome to Edinburgh is short and uncomfortable, with Felix's massive bulk seeming to take up all the available space next to me, spilling over the armrest. It is a relief to be back on the ground and running through the night air.

The fishing village of Lybster is on the coast. The squat stone buildings that line the main street have warm, glowing windows; a defense against the snow thick on the ground and the chill wind coming in off the ocean. Demetri has no trouble finding the trail, and we head inland, pulling up in a copse of trees bordering an old stone farmhouse.

"There are four of them," Demetri mutters. "Three males and a female."

Jane stares at the two-storey house, taking in her surroundings. Her scarlet eyes seem even more ferocious than usual in the moonlight. "Let's get this done," she says finally.

The vampires are in a large front room, sitting around a table in front of an empty stone fireplace, and they react with surprise and horror as Felix kicks in the door. Before they can scatter we fan out and stand before every exit, circling them. Their thoughts are bewildered and terrified. They know who we are; they have no idea why we are here.

The older male steps toward Felix, mistaking his size for authority. "Please. We've done nothing wrong. There's been some kind of mistake."

Jane knocks him from his feet and he cries out in pain, writhing terribly on ground. "Now, we all know that's not true, don't we?" Her voice is sweet, child-like, and laced with untempered malice.

The woman crouches at the side of the downed vampire, her thoughts filled with love and fear for one she thinks of as a father. "Please!" she begs Jane. "_Stop_!" She sounds just as Bella did; crying for me. Jane looks at her with disgust; but relents. The man on the ground relaxes with a whimper.

"You have broken the law." Jane's voice is brittle. She seems repulsed by the display of emotion before her; appalled by what she considers to be unforgivable weakness.

The youngest of the four looks to be about my age. He is running back over the last few months in his head, desperately trying to work out their mistake. It confuses me. The kills he recalls seem clean: a lone hunter in a forest, miles from anywhere; an aged fisherman whose body was recovered and thought to have fallen from his boat; an aimless hitchhiker whom no one appears to have missed. Nothing of the bloodbath we had described to us in Volterra.

I look at Jane. Something isn't right here.

"You're wrong about us," the boy tries. "We have only been here a couple of weeks. You must be looking for someone else."

"Really," Jane says quietly, pointing her pale finger at the woman still crouching on the floor, who looks up in shock. "I think you know what she is capable of."

The boy's mind roils in confusion. "Sarah?"

The old vampire has recovered enough to struggle weakly up into a sitting position. "Sarah has done nothing wrong." He says it with confidence, but his mind is filled with doubt. As if sensing this she turns to him, clasping his face in her hands. "Matthew," she whispers, sounding as if in tears. "I've done nothing. I swear it."

Jane laughs delightedly, and Sarah spins to look at her. "It's true, I..." Jane flicks a hand in Alec's direction and Sarah's mind goes instantly silent and blank.

"Now, now. We can't have you trying that on us, can we? Your gift may permit you to convince these wretches that your lies are the truth, but we both know better, don't we?"

Jane taps her foot impatiently, staring at Sarah's vacant expression, and then addresses the three men in front of her.

"This woman has broken our law. She has killed without caution, revealing herself to those around her. And you three have harbored her. You know the penalty."

"This is _ridiculous_!" The boy steps forward to protest, stopping as Felix snaps the leg off a nearby chair and brandishes it in front of himself like a club. "She hasn't done anything!"

Jane arches her eyebrow at him with a smirk. "Then why do your companions stay silent? They know, as we do, that your Sarah has a gift. That she can convince anyone that what she says is the truth."

I don't need to read Matthew's mind to know Jane is right about her gift; his face is a picture of guilt and fear. The fourth vampire stays mute. He, too, seems to be afraid that Sarah has, in fact, between killing wantonly and convincing them otherwise.

"Sarah!" the boy cries in panic. "Tell them! _Tell them this isn't true!_"

Sarah's mind remains a dense and quiet fog, thanks to Alec. I can't discern the truth or otherwise of Jane's story.

"She can't experience anything, right now," Jane says bluntly. "If we were to allow her to speak, she would only use her gift on us and convince us nothing had happened."

Matthew places a palm against Sarah's cheek. A benediction of sorts. His heart is breaking. He is wishing there was any way he could be sure of her innocence.

Jane taps her foot again sharply. "I'm tired of this. You understand the crime. Sentence will be passed on the girl in Volterra, where her power will not endanger us all. The rest of you knew what you were risking by staying with her. The sentence is death."

The boy screams as Jane raises her hand. Felix steps swiftly forward and snaps Matthew's neck, while Demetri nearly decapitates the fourth vampire.

"Edward?" Jane is looking at me with a tiny, wicked smile. "Would you like to finish him off, or shall I play for a while?"

The boy's eyes are scrunched closed in pain. She waves her fingers again, and his back arches in agony. I think of the fire I experienced through every nerve and muscle when she did this to me. The decision is easy. I kneel at his side, offer a silent prayer, and put him out of his misery.

Jane claps like a child. Like Aro's own.

I turn away from her abruptly, stalking from the room.

Demetri follows me out into the yard. His thoughts are curious. He is impressed that I killed the boy, but remains suspicious that I might be about to run. I walk to the nearest tree and start tearing branches off it.

"Are you going to help me?" I call over my shoulder. "A fire isn't going to build itself."

We work methodically, building a large bonfire on the frozen ground in front of the house, and before long the acrid smoke is curling up into the clear night sky. If Alec is struggling to keep the girl under control, he does not let on. His mind is calm and focused on the task at hand. I need more information, but I am not sure how to get it without compromising myself. Nothing about this night stacks up.

"Why didn't you tell me she had a gift?" I ask Jane, trying to sound as casual as I can. "I could have listened to her thoughts before she knew we were outside."

Jane looks at me with narrowed eyes. Her mind is a still pond. It feels deliberate, like the way Alice's mind fills with Urdu ghazals when she is trying to keep something from me.

"To what end?" she asks. "We know what she did; the scouts reported it to us last week. You were there. Why risk her convincing you otherwise?"

The scouts lied. Of this I feel certain. What I don't know is why. None of this makes sense. Why would Aro send me on a task that would reveal his double mindedness? Maybe Sarah is exactly what Jane says she is, after all.

Jane is studying my response. I shrug, aiming for indifference and feeling nothing but unease.

"We should go," she commands finally. "The fire is under control, and we need to get Alec back to Volterra swiftly. There is a flight in an hour."

Felix throws Sarah easily over his shoulder and we start our run south.


	11. Hope

Caius seems genuinely surprised that I have returned.

_Every opportunity to flee, and yet here you are. Scared of Demetri's skill?_

I don't give him the satisfaction of looking in his direction, concentrating instead on Sarah's weakened form as Felix dumps her unceremoniously at Aro's feet. Her dirty blond hair is lank, and clinging to her skin with sweat. Still lost in the grip of Alec's gift, she barely breathes, her mind a blank slate.

Aro congratulates Jane on the successful completion of our task. She beams at his praise, and it makes me realize that for all her centuries of living, she is still a very young girl at heart. The thought of Aro as any kind of father figure makes my stomach turn.

Being back in the Grand Hall feels cloying, but being back around Chelsea results in apathy cloaking me like a blanket. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I know that I should be appalled at myself. Carrying out the will of the Volturi so readily; killing the young vampire in Scotland. Bringing this poor woman back to Aro. My decisions feel muddled, riddled with second-guesses. I feel like I am trying to do the right thing, but I'm losing sight of what the _right thing _is any more.

I try to conjure up something to cling to, settling on the way Bella looked the night of her prom. Her face was the most divine contradiction: so beautiful, and so furious with me for misleading her about my plans for the evening. I think about the heat of her body under my hands as we danced. It is just enough. I tune out Aro's pompous, meandering pronouncements as he lays out the crimes Sarah is supposedly guilty of.

"Edward," he snaps, and I flick my eyes to his with a start. "When Alec releases Sarah's mind, she will be free to speak. If rumors of her gift are correct, she may then be able to convince any of us here of anything."

I give a curt nod. I have no idea why he is addressing me.

"You will tell us all if her thoughts are not aligned with her words."

I concentrate on keeping my expression as neutral as possible, even as my mind races. If Aro wants me to vouch for Sarah, he clearly believes in her gift, and thinks it possible that she will convince him not to touch her, whether now or in the future. He doesn't believe himself immune to her power, which makes it an immensely dangerous move on his part to bring her into his midst. I let my mind range around the room. The Guard is largely disinterested. They have seen newcomers come and go for decades, and they appear to be used to Aro's desire to collect new toys. Alec's mind is solely focused on keeping Sarah under control. Jane's emotions are mixed: suspicious of Sarah, but ultimately unconvinced that her power could be anything to rival her own. Marcus is paying absolutely no attention at all. Caius, on the other hand, is watching with keen interest. He wanted Sarah killed in the field. I see, now, that he and Aro argued at length over this. But just as Caius' discontent starts to rise again, Chelsea makes a slight move toward the podium, and his mind softens back into something more akin to mere contempt.

Aro is staring at Sarah, and his mind is a carefully schooled facade. He is picturing her alongside us all, dressed in the customary robes of the Guard, her red eyes bright with devotion to him and to his cause. This picture seems aimed squarely at me, because it doesn't waver and I can't access anything behind it.

I step toward Sarah, kneeling beside her pale form. Her face seems peaceful, but her clothes are damp and dirty from our run through the countryside. It is hard to guess at her age. She seems older than Rosalie, but not by much.

"What makes you think Edward will tell you the truth?" Caius' voice rings out, too loud in the hushed reverence of the Hall. Aro freezes, turning abruptly to his brother with barely masked irritation.

"Edward has spoken the truth the entire time he has been here," Aro sneers. "He has kept his word despite _countless _opportunities to break it. Even Jane's report of this recent journey further afield finds no fault with Edward's _performance_." His tone is jesting, but his thoughts are anything but. The shielding vision he has been maintaining for my benefit slips briefly as his anger flares beneath the surface. I'm staggered to realize he actually _believes _what he is saying. Not that he trusts me, exactly, but that in his arrogance he assumes I have come to see things his way. That there would be no _reason_ for me to leave any more. That the pinnacle of _any _vampire's existence would be to join the Guard.

And something else. Something darker, a flicker of a memory long buried. Surfacing for only the briefest heartbeat. _No reason to leave. No reason for anyone to leave._

And then it disappears. Just the returning picture of Sarah, her dark robes swirling about her ankles, her features flush with adoration, commitment and purpose.

Caius stares at his brother, but says nothing. Whatever battle of wills has taken place between them on this point will not be revisited.

Aro turns to me, arching an eyebrow in an unspoken question.

I nod, looking only at him, refusing to acknowledge Caius' apparently quelled insubordination. "I'm ready."

Aro gestures at Alec, who releases Sarah's mind immediately. She gasps in pain and shock, sitting bolt upright. I place a hand on her arm to try and calm her, as she stares around wildly, breathing heavily in disorientation and fear.

"Sarah, my name is Edward. You are in Volterra. Do you understand me?" She clutches at my hand, her mind racing and her eyes whipping around the room. Her thoughts are a jumble, the only constant being images of Matthew - her creator, her father. I want to be able to calm her, to offer her some reassurance. I would give anything for Jasper to be here to ease her suffering.

"Sarah." Aro has drawn himself up to his full height. Peering down at us from his elevated position, he is like something out of a nightmare. His unnatural skin looks ghostly, and his eyes nothing but calculating and evil. "You have been found guilty of breaking our law. Your companions have already been sentenced, and that sentence carried out."

Sarah sobs and slumps against me, all of the nervous energy draining out of her in an instant. Her eyes are dark and dull. She needs to feed.

Aro continues without emotion. "You have a talent that we think may be useful to us. We will commute your sentence if you pledge your allegiance to this family and join the Guard. If you do not wish to do so, the law will claim you now."

I look down at her crumpled form. I see so much of my own reaction when I believed Bella dead. It's like a light has gone out within her. She is turning over Aro's offer in her mind, but death seems like a relief to her in this moment. Her grief rolls off her in waves.

I should let her go. I should let her slip from the invisible shackles of this room, this horrific company of devils. Maybe I am wrong about our eternal lives, and Matthew waits for her somewhere. But I can't face any more death. Not today.

"Choose to live," I whisper into her hair. The words barely form, but nothing is out of earshot at this range to a vampire, and a wide smile spreads across Aro's face. I feel sick. I don't want her dead, but I haven't done it to please him.

Sarah's mind is weary and full of doubt, but even she doesn't wish to give him any satisfaction. I sense her courage returning, spurred on by a deep-seated anger toward Aro that rivals only my own. She struggles up onto her elbows, and I help her to her feet. She is grateful, but still suspicious of my motives.

Her voice is hoarse as she speaks. "I am grateful for your mercy, Lord Aro. I swear my allegiance to your family. I will never betray you, and will always do exactly as you ask. You will never have reason to question my loyalty."

Aro and Caius both appear to relax visibly.

In her mind, all I hear is this: _You and every other in this room will suffer at my hands for Matthew's death. I will not leave Volterra until every one of you is dead._

I turn to look at Aro, preparing to attempt to lie more convincingly than I have in a century.

"Edward," he says, with a vapid smile. "Perhaps you could get Sarah settled in before you hunt."

It is all I can do not to suck in a breath in surprise. I nod, and turn to guide Sarah from the room as quickly as I can, before Aro can change his mind, or worse, touch either of us. I am overwhelmed. Sarah's gift, stronger than any of them recognized, has meant he hasn't even bothered to verify her story. Can that last? Will he come to check up on us? To quiz me later about her thoughts?

Gianna is waiting in the lobby with shopping bags. "These are for the girl," she says, in her heavily accented English. "I have made up the suite down from yours." She follows us down the corridor, heels clicking on the stone.

I help Sarah into an overstuffed armchair, and Gianna puts the clothes on the bed.

"Should I stay? I could help her bathe?"

Gianna's desire to help is honest enough, even if her ultimate motivation makes my skin crawl.

"I can bathe myself, thank you." Sarah's voice is dull, but Gianna immediately nods and leaves us to it, closing the heavy door behind her.

Sarah turns to look at me. "Edward, you can leave me too. I am very happy to be here and to be one of you." There is absolutely no emotion in the words; she is making no effort at all. Her mind, on the other hand, screams the opposite.

I sigh and run a hand through my hair as I sink to a chair opposite her. "That won't work on me."

She looks startled, and immediately fearful. "I...I don't know what you mean..."

"Sarah, my gift ...I read minds. I can hear your thoughts before you speak. I think...I think that means that while your words would normally convince me, they don't, because I can hear the contradiction."

She swallows heavily, eyeing the door, thinking about screaming for help. Wondering how much worse her situation has just become. Then a thought stops her. _Why didn't you tell them? Why didn't you reveal me?_

The million dollar question. Not turning Sarah in could very quickly prove to be _my _downfall.

"I hate them, too," I whisper quietly.

She gasps.

"And if I'm ever getting out of here, it's only going to be with your help."


	12. Dread

The adrenaline that coursed through me in the hours after Victoria had her icy fingers around my throat gradually dissipates, leaving me bone tired. I have no trouble falling asleep even after everything that has happened. When I wake the next day, my eyes feel swollen from crying. Alice has gone, and my room feels claustrophobic and small. I tuck the small pile of memories Edward left behind into an empty shoebox in the back of my closet. Seeing them isn't going to bring him home, and it certainly isn't making the ache in my chest ease at all.

I find Charlie at the kitchen table, scowling at the newspaper and clutching a cup of coffee. I read the headlines over his shoulder while I pour my own. '_Death Toll on the Rise: Police Fear Gang Activity_'

"Everything okay?"

Charlie's shoulders slump, and he scrubs at his face with his hand. "Seattle. They have a lot of unexplained violent deaths at the moment." He looks up at me, and I wonder if my late-night meetings are making me look as exhausted as I feel. His expression softens. "Nothing for you to worry about, Bella. I just had some worried parents in this week. Their son's been missing in Seattle for a while."

"They think you can help?"

"They're trying everything they can think of."

I feel an unexpected surge of pride for my father and the burden he carries. If I'm honest, his job has always been a source of embarrassment, an unwanted reason for people to pay attention to me. Dropped off at school in the cruiser; known as the Chief's daughter. But as I look at him now, all I see is a man who wants to help. I give him an impulsive hug.

He lets out a startled chuckle. "What's got into you, Bells?"

I shake my head with a small smile. "I'll call you from the Rez."

Forks' usually predictable weather has broken for a rare sunny day, causing the last of the slushy snow to melt into puddles and keeping the Cullens at home. Alice's absence lets Jessica off the leash to be unbelievably annoying.

"It's weird, don't you think? That Alice and Jasper came back. Like, so close to the end of the school year? And, you know, that _he _didn't come back with them."

It's still too cold to sit outside, and so Jessica has parked her chair as close as she can to the cafeteria windows, her eyes closed as if she's laying out at the beach.

"I mean, there's no way my parents would let me go to _France_ for a semester. But I suppose Dr Cullen's not _really_ his dad." She opens one eye to look at me, trying to gauge my reaction. I concentrate on my salad. Jessica is undeterred. "And isn't it like, super-_weird_ for you? Hanging out with his sister? You know, after _…everything_." Her voice is dripping in faux-sympathy.

Angela takes pity on me. "Have you sent your announcements yet?"

I think about Graduation. How different this was all supposed to be. Edward and I talked about it last summer, as I lay with my back against his chest in the meadow, sunlight dancing off his fingers intertwined with mine. He was so excited _for _me, even as I assured him I would just trip on my gown and my cap would come flying off and everyone would laugh. He nuzzled at my earlobe and promised to catch me.

"No," I answer Angela. "There's no point, really. Renée knows when I'm graduating. Who else is there?" The question sort of hangs there. Jessica has both eyes open now.

The bell sounds for class, and I scoop my bag up gratefully before she can say anything more.

After school, I'm shocked to find Jacob waiting in the parking lot, leaning against his bike. He hands me a helmet. "I'm here to give you a ride." His expression is conflicted; hard to read. He stands out, among the students milling around. He's so tall, and his black t-shirt reveals just how muscular he has become. People are staring openly. I'm just so glad to see him in one piece.

"Are you okay? Is Quil really..."

"Quil's fine." He reaches out a hand, as if he's going to touch my face, but thinks better of it and drops it back to his side with a pained sigh. "God, Bella. She...if I'd..."

I reach my arms around his neck, dragging him down into a hug, the helmet dangling off my wrist against his back. The heat of him is overwhelming, his hands huge on my ribcage. I want to comfort him, and to thank him, and to apologize to him. A thousand things I can't say. "It's okay, Jake. You got there in time. I'm okay."

He presses his face into the side of my neck, drawing in a shuddering breath. Somewhere behind us I hear a wolf whistle, and I draw back sharply. An idiot jock in his football uniform is giving Jacob a thumbs-up, but the dumb smile freezes on his face when he takes in Jake's size and suddenly thunderous expression.

"C'mon, leave it," I urge, tugging on Jake's arm to get his attention. "What are you doing here?"

"We agreed with the leeches. If they can't be here to deliver you to the Rez after school, one of us will come for you. Leave your truck. We'll get it later."

I fasten the helmet. In the past, the idea of being accompanied everywhere I went would have felt suffocating, but as I climb onto the bike and wrap my arms around Jake's waist, all I can think is how safe it makes me feel.

The days start to blur into a routine. Rose does something irreparable to the engine in my truck, giving Alice and Jasper an excuse to pick me up for school each day. One of them drops me at the treaty line in the afternoons, and Jake comes to get me. At first, these handovers are as cold and tense as a hostage exchange. But gradually, as the wolves and the Cullens run patrols together night after night, the tension starts to diffuse. Not friendly; not even in the same universe as friendly. But a grudging respect on both sides that seems to be making things easier.

"That big one is _fast_." Jacob says one afternoon, kneeling beside his bike while he runs a compression test.

"Emmett." My chemistry books are spread all around me on the floor of the barn. Finals are coming up faster than I'd like.

"I'm saying he's _really _quick, for someone that big."

"And I'm saying his name is _Emmett_."

Jake rolls his eyes at me, but he's smiling. It's something I haven't seen for a long time, and it makes my heart swell in my chest.

"Still no sign of her?"

Jake shakes his head, concentrating on the gauge. "Nothing. But we're not letting our guard down. Not until after..." He trails off, tapping at the gauge distractedly.

"Not until after what?"

He looks up abruptly, as if I've startled him. "Oh, uh...no, I just mean..." He stammers, as if scrambling for a cover story.

I put the textbook down and narrow my eyes at him. "After _what_, Jacob?"

He sighs, rocking back on his heels and looking up at me with a slightly guilty expression. "I wasn't supposed to tell you. But the leeches think there's one of their kind killing people in Seattle."

I suck in a breath, thinking about the headlines in the paper and the extra hours Charlie has been putting in at the station. "They think it's Victoria? In Seattle?"

Jake shakes his head. "No. They think it's another one. They call it a _newborn._" He shudders at the thought. "It's out of control."

Just when I was foolish enough to think things were starting to reach some kind of equilibrium. There always seems to be a new crisis ready to unfold. Jacob comes and sits beside me on the tractor tire I'm using as a bench, placing one hand on my back. "Bella, don't worry. The leeches are going up there next weekend. They say they know how to deal with it. And we'll look after you while they're gone. It's not a big deal."

I try to feel comforted by this, but I hate that they've been keeping secrets from me. Jake pulls me to him, and kisses my forehead gently. "It's really okay, Bella. I won't let anything happen to you."

I want to believe him. But I've heard this before. Edward promised me the very same thing, and he was never able to keep his word.

"Bella?"

Jake is looking at me with concern and...something else. His eyes are huge and dark, and I'm suddenly very aware of how close his body is to mine. I get to my feet, a little too quickly, tripping over a chemistry text. Jake reaches out a hand to steady me.

"Can you drop me back to the line? I need to get home. I'll call Alice." The words tumble out of me in a rush, as I gather my books and stuff them back into my pack. I don't look at Jacob. I don't want to see the disappointed expression I know I will find there.

It's Jasper who meets me at the bend in the highway. He looks from Jacob to me and back again, his face openly curious. I give Jake a quick, awkward hug goodbye and get into the car without looking back. Jasper and Jake talk for a few minutes, and I fiddle with the station dial on Jasper's radio while I wait, trying to sort through my feelings. I know that Jacob cares about me, but until now it has felt protective, brotherly. The look he gave me this afternoon was anything but, and I feel confused and unsettled.

Jasper says nothing when he gets into the car, and I'm absurdly grateful. "Tell me about Seattle."

"Our kind are often the ones behind the horrors in your news, Bella. When we are first changed, we are bloodthirsty, wild. Out of control."

I try to imagine any of the Cullens like that, and fail. Edward hinted at it, every time I raised my desire to be like him. He hinted at a side to their lives that I did not understand. I wonder what more he has kept from me.

"What will you do?"

"Whoever made this vampire has abandoned it. We may need to take care of it before the Volturi does."

Just the mention of the ancient order causes ice to flow through my veins. "They would come here?"

"They would send the Guard."

My breath catches in my throat and I stare at Jasper in shock. "Would they send _him_?"

Jasper stares straight ahead at the road. "Alice doesn't think so, no."

"But her visions have been all over the place! The wolves have been playing havoc with her sight!"

Jasper's jaw flexes, but he stays silent.

"We have to _talk _about this, Jasper! Maybe this is exactly what we need! A reason for the Volturi to send him _here_. To send him back to us!"

Jasper swings his car swiftly into the driveway behind Charlie's cruiser. He kills the engine and turns to look at me. "Bella, if the Volturi come here to clean house, it won't end well for any of us. Come inside. We'll tell Charlie I'm helping you with your homework, and I'll try to explain."

I slam his car door in frustration, and stomp up the path ahead of him. I'm just about to cross the threshold when Jasper is suddenly in front of me. His eyes are wild and he is breathing deeply. "Jasper? What ..."

"Give me two seconds. Stay right here. Do not move."

My heart starts to pound as Jasper shoots into the house so quickly he becomes invisible. I count to two and he is back at my side, ushering me into the hallway. Charlie has not even stirred on the couch. Jasper nods in Charlie's direction, and presses my arm.

"Uh, Dad? Jasper and I have some history homework. We're just going to do a bit more study upstairs. I'll make dinner in a little while."

Charlie mumbles an acknowledgement and turns back to the television.

Jasper half drags me up the stairs, my feet barely touching the carpet.

"Somebody has been here," he whispers as he shuts my bedroom door quietly. "One of us."

My blood runs cold, and I bite my lip hard. "Victoria?" Jasper has his cell phone out and is dialing.

"It's not a scent I recognize." He digs my phone out of my backpack and hands it to me. My own panic seems to be magnifying and expanding. I'm waiting for reassuring calm from Jasper, but there is nothing. I start to feel sick. Jasper looks up at me, his expression desperate. "Call the wolves. We need to meet. _Now_."

* * *

><p><strong>.x.<br>**

**Thanks to all of you for reading and reviewing. I've got a week behind in my replies, but I am catching up now. And a special thanks to DarkBlueBella for sending some of her readers over here. It's so nice to have you!**


	13. Panic

"I want to hunt with Edward."

Aro looks up in surprise at Sarah's unexpected announcement. Since her arrival, she has kept very quiet and very much to herself. She appears nervous, flighty, still overcome with grief and fear. Underneath this facade, she exists as nothing but seething rage. My few snatched words with her when we've found ourselves alone have done little to calm the situation. My only success has been in convincing her not to run.

Yet.

My motives are entirely selfish.

Caius sneers, "Another _vegetarian_? Really, Sarah. I'm not even sure why we overlook Edward's _idiosyncrasies_. We do not expect them to spread."

She draws herself up a little taller, seemingly with effort, and turns to face him, her voice slightly more confident. She is such a contradiction. Every thought is of his brutal death, and yet she looks like a contrite, scared young woman. The robe she has been given is too big for her, and pools around her ankles. Her hair is limp and tangled. She looks...harmless. Pathetic, even. "I have never been a city dweller. I miss the outdoors. I miss the _hunt_."

Caius gives her a disinterested nod, and returns to the papers he is reading. Aro is staring at me, and it makes me uncomfortable. Once again his thoughts are light and empty. I've had no indication that he distrusts me. Or Sarah, for that matter. But the way he continues to conceal his thinking is disturbing. "Edward. Is there any reason why Sarah should not accompany you?"

I stumble over the possible double meaning behind his words. Is he asking if I care whether she comes along, or is he testing her sincerity? I don't even glance in Sarah's direction, aiming for a neutral tone. "She thinks of forests, and of running. She longs to stretch her legs. I would be glad of the company."

Sarah has no way of knowing the strength or extent of her gift. She says to Aro at least once a day that she would prefer not to be touched, and so far it seems to have held. But despite her repeated assurances of devotion and delight, it still occasionally seems to occur to him to check with me that her thoughts are aligned. The uncertainty makes me feel ill. We cannot possibly keep up this charade for any serious length of time. And time is against me. Chelsea's creeping apathy continues to water down my memories and pluck at the strings of my commitment to leaving.

"Let her go with the boy." The sound of Marcus' voice causes heads to turn. He has kept to the library more and more often, and it is unexpected to see him enter the Hall. As he sinks to his chair, his usually effortless grace seems stilted. If it were possible, I would think he was feeling his age. His thoughts are also of running, and of forests, but they are not happy memories. And they are pervaded with an unarticulated weakness. Something I can't quite put my finger on.

The rear doors swing open with a thud, and Jane and Alec breeze in. Aro is instantly distracted. "Very well, take her. Hunt your filthy beasts." He waves a hand at me, attempting a bored expression. But his eyes are sharp and fixated on Jane, and disguised thoughts are rumbling below his carefully cultivated veneer like thunderclouds. "Clear the Hall."

I take Sarah's wrist and lead her quickly from the town.

We loop back on our own trail several times on the run north; until I can be as certain as I can that no one is tracking us into the craggy foothills. Sarah wrinkles her nose at the prospect of our evening meal. "This is really disgusting. How do you live like this?"

"It's the only way I can live with myself," I answer honestly.

She sighs, and slakes her thirst reluctantly with the boar. She kicks the carcass into the narrow ravine, and sinks to the soft earth, her back against the bark of a tree. "Why don't we run, Edward? We could be halfway to Russia before they realized."

I sigh in frustration. "Believe me, I think about it _every_day. But they have the best trackers in the world. They would be on us before we had our next meal."

She scuffs her boot in the earth as she thinks, back and forth. "So I tell them that we are leaving and they should let us go. We know it's worked so far. He hasn't touched me once."

This had been her first thought, the night we met. That we return immediately to the Grand Hall so that she could order Aro to let us both leave unharmed. But without any assurance that she could convince all of them, or that it would last, I believed it to be too dangerous. We needed to make sure that the moment we left the room, the spell wouldn't be broken and the whole Guard on our trail.

I argued that we needed to test her gift, to be _sure_, before we made our move. Now I was beginning to wonder how we would ever have the confidence we needed.

"One more experiment." The solution I hit upon isn't perfect, but it's better than fleeing and finding out the hard way that we're wrong. Sarah scowls at me. Volterra makes her scratchy and claustrophobic. She still feels the pain of the loss of her coven vividly, and her thoughts turn frequently to violent revenge. Only my stories of what the Guard is capable of have tempered her plans toward flight rather than fight.

"God, Edward. It's like you don't even _want_ to leave any more," Sarah snaps at me. "You tell me that you love your family, your human. And yet every time I suggest getting back to them, you _stall_!"

Her words send a shudder down my spine. Can that be what's happening? Am I being cautious because this place and these vampires are seeping under my skin, poisoning the last of my free will? I think of Bella, and a game of baseball. Before this all went wrong. The wide smile on her face; the way she bounced and clapped in delight as we played. _Bella_.

"Hear me out," I groan, as the image fades, like a half-developed Polaroid. "The next time Aro sends a detachment, you tell him that we are to go as well. We accompany them on whatever errand he has in store. If it's your presence that's required to keep up the control, we'll know as soon as we return. It will have dissipated in your absence."

She frowns, considering my proposal.

"One side trip, Sarah. One mindless task of retribution for these animals, and we'll know for sure. If we come back and everything is as we left it, you can tell Aro straight away that it's time for us to go."

She sighs, shaking her head slowly and extending one hand up to me to help her to her feet. It's a curiously human gesture, and as I tug her up to stand in front of me I give her an impulsive hug. I want to keep her safe. I want to keep us _both_safe. "One trip," she agrees against my shoulder. "Then I'm leaving, with or without you."

I figure we will have a couple of days to plan before the next time the Guard is ordered out on reconnaissance, and so I head straight to the Library to carry on my research. The Volturi collection is an unprecedented chance to learn as much as I can about vampires and their gifts. Vampires and their relationships.

Vampires...and their humans.

_It is neither uncommon, nor particularly dangerous._

Marcus is reclining on a chaise against one wall, his back supported by a pile of velvet pillows. As impossible as it seems, he looks frail. I'm momentarily confused about what he's thinking. It must show on my face.

_Your beloved. You worry that you cannot be united before her change. That's why you read these books. But in the centuries I have lived, I have seen few bonds as strong as yours._

I give a short, unhappy laugh. "If I stay here much longer, I doubt that will remain true."

Marcus doesn't smile. _We are all manipulated, in various ways. You must decide for yourself your own path_.

His eyes are blacker than midnight. I wonder how I haven't picked up on this before now.

"You're not feeding."

A flicker of recognition dances across his pale features and disappears. His thoughts return to those of his wife, laughing and smiling, her skin dancing in a Tuscan sunset. _Self-determination is its own reward._

My stomach sinks in horror and disbelief. "Why don't you _leave_?"

His answering smile settles into more of a grimace, his thoughts all too familiar. _There's no reason for anyone to leave_.

I stand with a start, slamming closed the book in front of me and backing away to the door. Marcus doesn't move, his dark eyes drifting closed. This is a nightmare. I've been wrong. I need to find Sarah. Every day we stay here is another shackle we may never unlock.

I break into a jog as I head through the ornate corridors back to the Great Hall. Aro and Caius are discussing something quietly at the podium with Jane and Demetri. Sarah looks up as I enter. _This is it. They are about to send out a group_.

Already? Hope soars in my chest, even as the rational part of my brain searches for an explanation. Demetri only returned from Mexico yesterday. It's not like Aro to send him out again so quickly.

"Very well. Jane, you will take Alec, Demetri and Felix. You will leave tonight."

Sarah steps forward tentatively. I'm suddenly overcome with anxiety. There are pieces of this puzzle I am missing, and I can't shake the feeling we are about to make a terrible mistake.

"Lord Aro?" Jane whirls on her heel to glare at Sarah's interruption. She begins to raise one hand, and for a dreadful second I think she is about to strike. "I think you should send Edward and me as w..." Sarah crumples to the floor with a dreadful thud. I am at her side in an instant, expecting her to be writhing in pain, but her eyes are distant and unfocused. I look up in shock.

Aro is even more horrified than I am.

"Alec? What is the _meaning_ of this?" Aro strides across the room to a slightly bewildered looking Alec, who does indeed seem to be holding Sarah in his thrall. "Let her go at _once_."

Alec shakes his head in obvious confusion, releasing Sarah who begins to stir in my arms, taking small, gasping breaths. I look back at the confrontation before me, my lungs constricted in terror. My mind races through possible exits. Can I pick Sarah up and run? How far will we get before Felix is upon us; before Jane can react? Aro's expression is thunderous. He shoves the sleeve of Alec's robe back and grabs at the bare skin of his wrist. Alec looks as terrified as I feel, as Aro's eyes widen. The Grand Hall is completely silent. Not a vampire present moves.

"_Jane_?" Aro's voice is small, broken with betrayal. "You asked him to do this if you gave him a sign? WHY?"

Jane's tiny figure is trembling, her lower lip pouting like a little child. She's shaking her head. "_Father,_" she whispers, a term of endearment I never expected to hear from her. "I just thought..."

My fear starts to become a tangible thing, stretching its icy fingers over my skin. I clutch at Sarah. This is where it falls apart. This is where Jane, who must have come to understand what was happening, brings us to our end.

Aro stalks toward her. Caius' head is tilted to the side, appraising her with a mixture of irritation and surprise. This is clearly the first time she has overstepped her boundaries in such an overt way.

"Speak clearly, dear heart," Aro's tone is laced with venom. "Do you not _want_ Sarah and Edward to go with you? Even after I gave you such..._autonomy_?"

And then I see it. Something in the rapid blinking of her scarlet eyes, the way she keeps giving her head a little shake, as if she's trying to clear it. She's struggling with something. "No...I...think you _should_ send Edward and Sarah..." Her eyebrows are knitted together in confusion. It is all I can do to swallow a choked sob of relief. _It worked, _Sarah and I think at exactly the same instant.

Aro is brought up short. "Then _why_would you ask Alec to intervene?"

Jane seems to be struck dumb. She seems no more able to contradict Sarah's wish than she is to explain herself, and Aro is losing patience. I suck in my breath as he reaches for her arm, powerless to stop him from touching her and finding out the truth.

"Wait!" Sarah squeaks hoarsely, pushing herself up from my lap. Jane's gaze swings wildly from Aro to Sarah, like a cornered animal. "Lord Aro, this is all a misunderstanding. I consider Jane my _sister_, and like all families, we are prone to _pranks_occasionally." Sarah struggles up to her feet, pushing back her robe and throwing an arm around Jane, who looks even more startled than I do. "She was teasing me, nothing more."

My mind ranges out around the Hall, searching for a dissenting view. Someone, _anyone_, who sees this farce for what it is. Boredom, contempt, disinterest, impatience, hunger. Caius is thinking warily towards Jane, but even he seems only concerned that such a childish diversion has no place in the work she is expected to undertake.

I do not find a shadow of doubt.

"Fine," Aro spits finally, returning to his seat. "Keep your playtime from this Hall. Go! Make your preparations. You depart at dusk."

I trail Sarah to her room, collapsing against the door as I close it behind us. She fetches notepaper from her desk. She has me write, even within our chambers, never trusting us not to be overheard.

Sarah's hand shakes as she hands me the pen. I have no idea what to write. _So this is still the plan? _she thinks. _We go on this mission, we return to make sure? I don't want to come back. It's too dangerous._

I nod slowly. We may be damned either way.

I write slowly:_ We have to be sure. We come back just long enough to tell him we are leaving._

She looks sickened by the thought.

_And if it hasn't worked? Then what?_

I take her hand in mine, and give it a small squeeze.

_Then I'd rather die quickly here, than hunted like an animal._

She looks a lot less certain of this conclusion. But she takes the paper from me and sets it alight in the stone fireplace, casting off her robe and throwing things into a duffel for the trip.

I get to my feet wearily. "Are we returning to Mexico?" I can only assume that this hurried deployment has resulted from Demetri's recent journey. Sarah fastens her hair back in a clip, and digs around under her bed for another pair of boots.

"No. They have a newborn problem. In Seattle."

* * *

><p><strong>I'm so sorry for the posting schedule getting a little mucked around. A couple of weeks of work trips have made it really tough for my beta and I to touch base. Thank you so much for hanging in there, for emailing to see if I am okay, and for leaving such lovely reviews. I am on track to finish, and your regular weekly updates should now resume!<strong>


	14. Plan

Jake answers the phone on the first ring, his tone light and hopeful. My heart sinks. His responses become terse as soon as I explain what has happened. He agrees to gather the pack immediately and disconnects without saying goodbye.

Jasper paces around my room, running an agitated hand through his hair. "Is anything missing?"

I look around, puzzled by the idea that a vampire might have burgled the house. Everything seems to be in its place. I even dig the shoebox from the back of the closet, but my mementos of Edward are right where I left them.

As I close the closet door I look at the stuffed laundry hamper. Despite the gravity of the situation, it occurs to me that it's been too long since I did the wash. A thought itches at the back of my mind, and I rush out onto the landing. "Dad, have you done laundry this week?"

"Ah, no," Charlie calls back, sounding a little confused. "Did you want me to?"

"No, no. I got it. I've just misplaced a sweater."

Jasper's eyes are as wide as mine when I step back into the room.

"It's red," I gasp. "I think it's been missing since the night Victoria was here."

He curses under his breath. I hate seeing Jasper so flustered, and I don't understand what Victoria, or any vampire, would want with my clothes. "Stay here. Emmett's outside. One of us will be back for you as soon as your father's asleep."

He dashes down the stairs before I can protest, calling a hurried good-bye over his shoulder to Charlie. His tires squeal as he pulls away from the house. I slump onto the bed in frustration, my mind racing with the possibilities. A vampire has been here. In the house, in my _room_. Maybe more than once. Maybe more than _one_. The thought makes me feel ill. I tug my quilt around me and wait, calling out a weak goodnight as Charlie heads to bed an hour later.

Unusually, it is Esme who comes to collect me. She hugs me close, and even though her cold embrace is nothing like my mother's it makes me ache for Renee. "This will be over soon, Bella," she soothes. It doesn't make me feel any better.

The need for neutral ground seems to have passed, and the pack is at the Cullens' house when we arrive. Those in wolf form are running slow loops around the property. Sam and Jake are inside, and neither looks happy. Jake is arguing with Alice, who is standing her ground, despite the almost comical differences in their sizes.

"I don't _know_. I can't see _anything _clearly with you dogs around."

Jake scowls at the slur, leaning over her. "It was in _her room_."

Jasper steps swiftly between them, placing a cautioning palm against Jake's chest, with a look that causes Jake to step sharply backwards. "I promised your alpha I wouldn't move your emotions. In return, you _will _respect my wife and my family."

I reach for Jake's arm, and he whirls toward me a little too quickly, the pent up energy causing his shape to thrum and shimmer. When he realizes that it's me, his expression softens. His agitation settles into concern. "It's okay, Jake. I'm okay. Don't take it out on Alice."

Before Jake can respond, Emmett and Rose burst through the kitchen door. "Nothing. The trail is cold." Emmett can't mask his disappointment, clearly spoiling for a fight.

Carlisle sits in an overstuffed armchair in the corner, wearing a subdued expression with his fingers steepled at his chin. "Let's think about this logically. It may be that the Volturi are here already, checking on Bella?"

Alice shakes her head emphatically. "No, I've been watching Aro's decisions. He has never given any thought to sending someone after Bella."

An involuntary shudder runs through me, just at the mere thought of the ancient leader and his evil retinue. "What about...one of the others? Jane...or...Caius?" Their bright red eyes, flowing hair and robes. The idea that any of those monsters could have been so close to Charlie is unthinkable. The _danger _I've put him in.

Carlisle pauses to consider this for a moment. "No. If the Volturi were here, I believe they would have called on me. Out of formality, if not courtesy."

"A nomad, then?" Esme seems as confused as the rest of them. Jake huffs in irritation, and this time it is Sam who gives him a warning look. The atmosphere in the room is thick and uncomfortable.

Jasper suddenly gets to his feet and leaves abruptly, returning to drop a newspaper on the coffee table. The headline blares about further deaths in Seattle. "It's not a nomad." The room stills. Jasper has everyone's attention. "The vampire in Bella's room took an item of her clothing." Jake sucks in his breath with a hiss. "This was not a nomad or a newborn. Neither would have left Charlie alive. This was someone who came to take something of Bella's. Something that carried Bella's scent."

My stomach turns at the thought. Suddenly the personal violation seems even worse than I'd imagined.

"The news coverage tells us that we have a bigger problem than we thought. Seattle isn't the work of one newborn, and if someone is making newborns and isn't teaching them the rules..." Jasper trails off, looking meaningfully at Carlisle whose eyebrows have shot up near his hairline in surprise.

"An _army?_"

Jasper nods slowly. "I thought I had to be wrong. There is no reason for anyone to create an army here, no motive. But there's no other explanation. Someone is creating an army of newborn vampires in Seattle."

My eyes dart around the room. The Cullens all look more worried than I've ever seen them. Jake and Sam seem as confused as I am. "What are you talking about?" I ask, my voice coming out shaky. "What sort of army? I thought all other vampires were nomadic? Not...organized in any way?"

Carlisle gives Jasper a meaningful look. He looks down at Alice, who gives his hand a reassuring squeeze and nods at him. He drops her hand and rolls up one of the sleeves of his button-down as he walks toward me, sitting down on the sofa beside me and offering me his arm. At first I just stare at it blankly, before my eyes adjust, and I notice the silver patterning on his skin. I reach out to trace it before gasping in surprise. "_Jasper_! These are...these are _scars_?"

He nods, lacing his fingers through mine and covering my anxiety with a blanket of calm as he tells his story of origin and betrayal. My heart aches for him, for all the pain that he has witnessed, but underneath that fear murmurs. If Italy taught me anything, it was that my idealized view of vampires was wholly misplaced. Jasper's devastating history confirms this. Maybe Jake has been right all along. The Cullens are not monsters. But the rest of their kind?

"And you think someone is doing this again? Creating a barely-controlled band of newborns? For...territory?" Sam's brow is furrowed. He's listened silently to Jasper's story with a look of disgust on his face. Now he needs to understand the threat.

"No," Jasper shakes his head, and doesn't let go of my hand. I'm comforted by the gesture, but I can't tell if that's his gift or just the sense of safety I have from a cool, solid touch so much like Edward's. "At first, that's what I assumed. Territory, or perhaps just the threat that a coven of our size might pose. Now I think it's something different. I think this army is coming for Bella. Victoria won't rest until she has her revenge."

"I've been watching Victoria!" Alice protests, her eyes bright and fierce. I want to comfort her. I know she's been trying her level best to keep us all safe. Jasper gets up and crosses the room in a stride, drawing her to him and smoothing her hair.

"I know, I know. I think she's worked that out. I think she's using someone else to do this. And whoever that is was in Bella's room."

I jump at a sudden slam, as Jake thunders from the room, letting the door crack against the molding. Sam moves to go after him, but I am already on my feet. "Let me." As I leave the room I hear Carlisle say, "We're going to need help."

I fear that Jake will have already taken off into the forest, but instead he is sitting on the front step, hunched over in an almost defeated pose. I sink to sit beside him, nudging him gently with my shoulder.

"God, Bella. I don't want this for you. I wish..." He turns to look at me. His eyes are dark and pleading. "Come back to the Rez. We'll get Charlie to come too; Billy can make up some excuse for a fishing trip or something. I can keep you _safe_there, Bella. Let's leave these bloodsuckers to their stupid war."

I give him a small, rueful smile. "You don't mean that."

His answering grin has a little of the old Jacob around the edges. "No, I guess I don't. I _really_ want the chance to kill at least _some_ of these leeches. But I do want you to be safe." He puts both his hands on my shoulders, and his voice is low and sure. "I love you, Bella. I'm _in_ love with you. And I know that when you had the choice, you chose _him_. But he's not here anymore, and I am. I'll wait for you, Bella. I'll wait for you to be ready."

I shiver, even under his over-heated touch. It's too much. All of it. The unknown threat that heads toward us, the giant wolves loping along the tree line, the room full of agitated vampires inside. I don't know what to think, what to feel. I certainly don't know what to say.

Emmett throws the front door open, interrupting the silence that stretches between us.

"Alice has seen the newborns. They have Bella's sweater, and they're on their way."

Jake hauls me up to my feet and ushers me back into the house.

"How much time do we have?"

"Two nights, maybe three. I don't see them travelling during the day." Alice is sitting cross-legged on the floor with a sketchpad. Sometimes drawing what she sees helps her to focus, and her pencil is flying across the page as she tears one off and starts again. There are cityscapes, an overturned car on fire, an ocean. Tall figures in long robes. I rush to her side, clutching at the picture. "Is this...?"

Alice's mouth is pursed in concentration. "Sometimes," she concedes with a sigh. "But Bella, these pictures are changing every minute. Sometimes the Volturi don't come at all. And sometimes he doesn't come with them."

_Edward_. Edward could be coming. I trace her charcoal sketch with one finger and don't look up, afraid to show Jake my expression.

"We need to train," Jasper says to Sam. "There are things I need to show you, about fighting newborns. It will be different to chasing Victoria. We have to get Bella away from here. She's the center of this threat."

Esme suddenly raises her hand to her mouth, as if something has just occurred to her. "There may be a way. We gave Bella flights to Florida for her birthday."

Carlisle is nodding, but I'm still in the dark. "I'm not sure about her going on her own."

"I don't understand..."

Esme ignores my confusion, concentrating on Carlisle. "Renee wouldn't find that unexpected? That she'd visit before Graduation?"

My heart sinks. "You _can't _just send me away like a child!"

I look at Jake for back-up, but find none. Even he is nodding at Esme.

"I have to be there," I protest. "You're all like family to me. I can't not be there when you're putting everything on the line for me." Anxiety is surging through my veins. I _can't_be sent away. Not this close to seeing Edward again.

"No," Jake says, finally. "It's going to be a short fight. We'll deal with it easily. There's no need for you to be there."

Suddenly a dreadful idea occurs to me. Desperation is turning me into someone I don't even want to recognize. I step closer to him, placing one hand on his arm. Struck for the thousandth time at his warm strength. "And everybody will be fine?"

He nods, his jaw flexing. As if he can't trust himself to speak the lie aloud.

I take a deep breath. It's this or nothing. "And so if it is going to be so easy, you could sit the fight out?"

His dark eyes flash in confusion. "I...uh..." He looks to Alice and Esme, a trapped expression on his face.

"You could take me to Florida. And then we would both be safe."

The guilt is overwhelming. I feel sick to my stomach. It's taking awful advantage of his feelings for me, but there's no other way. I won't be exiled. I won't miss what's about to happen.

Jacob's jaw drops. He looks around at the Cullens for help, but everyone seems to be frozen in place. "You'd ask me to let the pack fight without my help?"

I nod. "Or to let me be there. Either way, so long as we're together." I lace my fingers through his, and give him what I hope is an imploring expression. I hate myself for doing this.

Jacob sighs, and draws himself up to his full height before turning to Carlisle. "She stays. We'll work out a way to keep her safe."

I exhale slowly, tuning out the preparations for battle that start to whirl around me. Smoothing my fingertips over Alice's sketch of a young man with wild hair, striding across a field, his dark robe swirling around his ankles.

I know it with a heart's certainty, even if Alice does not. Edward is on his way.


	15. Avenge

**I want to thank Katinki for reccing this story over at her fabulous With Teeth segment on Fictionators. She sent such a huge number of lovely readers this way, and I'm so glad to have you all. I'm also grateful to hear from those who stopped by from Under the Radar, and those who jumped across after PPSS' Lemon Report reviewed The Rising Swell. All the pressure to impress slowed me down, but we're underway again, and on the race to the conclusion. Let me know what you think!**

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><p>We land in Seattle as sunset bleeds across the sky. Being back in Washington fills me with anxiety. I'm so close to my family, to Bella, that I find it almost impossible to keep myself in check as we clear security and stride at human pace through the arrivals area. I find myself staring at a bank of payphones, trying to conjure up some way to distract the others long enough to make a call.<p>

Suddenly Sarah brushes past me, pinching the skin of my wrist sharply for a second, and breaking me out of my trance.

_Do not lose focus now. One slip and Bella is as good as dead. You know that. _

Her thoughts are angry, but determined.

_You are the one making me do this, Edward. We follow the plan to the letter, or we run. You need to make up your mind_.

I look at Demetri's broad shoulders as he stalks toward the exit, tourists scattering out of his way, and a wave of defeat rolls over me. Sarah is right. The plan is the only way this works, and if I get distracted, my family - Bella - will pay the price.

We take a cab into the city as the sky turns to ink. After the chaos in the Grand Hall, Aro decided that it would do Jane good to have some time apart from Alec. He and Felix remain in Volterra, with Sarah and me taking their place. Jane's thoughts have returned to a calculated facade. A still pond that looks cool and inviting on the surface, and hides any number of threats in the dark water below. Sarah is a bundle of nervous energy. Demetri is single-minded about the hunt. Not that we need a tracker to find the newborns. Never in all my years have I seen vampires so careless, making absolutely no effort to keep a low profile.

Jane insists we maintain our distance, and we watch from the roof of a parking garage in a seedy area near the port, as the group tears into a security guard who had the misfortune to walk by on his rounds. The vampires are unkempt. Aggressive. Shoving each other out of the way to maul the corpse. I am revolted.

I wait for Jane to intervene, but she just watches. Poised in her inaction like a porcelain doll, her eyes like bright rubies. Sarah is as confused as I am.

"Aren't we going to stop them?" she asks.

The newborns have made short work of the guard, and two of them have now gotten into a fistfight. The others seem lost, ambling around as if another victim might just happen across their paths. Their thoughts are child-like, shambolic, and full of little but a lust for blood and excitement.

"Not yet." Jane's tone is curt. Dismissive. "We are gathering information."

I don't understand what more information she needs. The body of the guard looks like he's been torn apart by sharks and the newborns are beginning to leave, making no effort to clean up after themselves.

Suddenly there is a loud thud, as a newcomer leaps on top of a parked car and begins to unleash a stream of angry curses at the newborns. They react with shock, appearing to cower. The vampire looks to be about my age, in human terms. His eyes flash with rage as he yells at the newborns for failing to follow his instructions, demanding they get out of sight immediately. Clearly used to following his orders, the group breaks into a run.

"The creator?" Demetri asks, and Jane gives a short shake of her head.

"His name is Riley," I murmur, having heard it over and over in the distracted minds of the newborns.

Riley is agitated. He hauls the corpse easily over one shoulder and runs to the edge of a nearby pier, throwing it into the water. Returning rapidly, he stares in disbelief and frustration at the blood and gore on the concrete.

"He _has _given them instruction," I relay, as I listen to his thoughts. "He's...he's angry that they're being so indiscreet. But he hasn't...he doesn't know anything about us. That's not the consequence he fears. He's very young himself. I'd say no more than a year? There's no way he would have the restraint to change someone."

Demetri scowls as he considers what I've said. "Someone's raising an army?"

Jane's lips are pressed together in a thin line. Her mind gives nothing away.

I think about Jasper, and the horror of his lineage. The wars in the South have been over for decades. What would cause anyone to think about creating an army here in Seattle? And how has Carlisle let this progress so far? My thoughts race as I try to put the mismatched pieces together. Maybe the family isn't in Washington. Or maybe...

"Wait!" I let out a strangled gasp. "The only possible threat in the area that would call for the creation of an army is _my family_!" The realization is like ice water through every vein. Sarah looks at me with a shocked expression. Neither Jane nor Demetri seem at all surprised.

"What's going on here? Do you _know _who is behind this? Have you _warned _Carlisle?"

Jane arches an eyebrow at me. I look for some sign that she's enjoying this, but her mind is still clouded. She wears no hint of a smile. "We are gathering information," she repeats coolly. "Demetri, we follow this Riley. Edward, if it turns out your family is in danger, I am sure Aro will let them know." She shoulders past me to follow Demetri down the exit ramp behind us. I'm slow to move, still paralyzed by the idea that these rabid newborns could be headed for Forks.

Sarah tugs at my sleeve. _Come on. If we can get to Riley, we might be able to stop this before it ever starts. _

I want to scream at her. I need her to do something. One word from Sarah, and Jane will have to let me call Carlisle to warn him; will have to let me go to them _right now_. But I can't ask her. I can't _ask_her without Jane hearing, and this whole dreadful ruse crashing down around our ears.

The powerlessness is overwhelming. I do the only thing I can do. In a stupor, I turn and follow Jane.

We escape the city limits and head into the surrounding forest. Even at night, the lush greenery makes my stomach curl with homesickness. The leaves are damp, and the smell of the rain, the loam, feels like everything I've been missing is within reach. Within reach, and in life-threatening danger.

We run for several miles, following Demetri's lead, before the trees start to thin and we come across a wide field. The house at its center is painted in garish colors, and seems completely out of place in the surrounding landscape. Demetri pauses at the tree line and looks at me, tilting his head in silent inquiry. I let my mind range out to listen for occupants, and wish instantly that I hadn't.

"Two," I whisper. "And they're...coupling." Sarah snorts a short laugh. Jane's features curl up into a disdainful sneer. I wonder what it must be like: an eternal woman in what amounts to a child's body. No wonder the Volturi took such extreme steps regarding the immortal children. There is something horrifying and cruel about trapping a person forever in a body so young.

Demetri moves to break cover, and I'm about to follow when something brings me up short. I catch his sleeve with a hiss. "Wait."

The couple inside have emerged from the fog of lust and their thoughts are crystallizing again. Riley's mind is full of the look of his lover, obsessed with every angle of her form, the delicate features of her ashen face, her long, _red_hair...

_Victoria._

I'm running before I am even aware of it, tearing across the wet grass toward the ornate house. I give no thought to the plan. I have no idea if the others are even following me. The front door splinters under my shoulder-charge, and I am up the stairs with my fingers around her bony throat before she even has time to cover herself. Riley lunges for me, but Jane is swifter, tearing in right on my heels and launching Riley across the room. He collapses in the corner, whimpering in pain.

"Let her go, Edward."

Jane's voice is calm, but the threat is unmistakable. A growl tears loose from my throat as I stare at Victoria, her mind overwhelmed with fear and loathing. I tighten my grip.

"I won't ask again, Edward."

My rage is like a physical presence in the bedroom. I feel sure I would have time, in the heartbeat before Jane could strike, to tear this venomous creature's head from her shoulders.

Suddenly Sarah is there, placing a hand on my arm, her long fingers wrapping around my bicep. _Maybe you should do what she says, Edward. There is too much going on here that we do not understand. If you kill the redhead, what will we learn?_

I despise the hope that blooms in Victoria's hunted expression. I toss her limp form across the room with an agonized howl, and she crashes into a closet door, which splits with a sharp crack.

Jane throws a bathrobe at Victoria, seemingly disgusted by her nakedness. Victoria drags it gratefully around herself, getting to her feet. Her mind races, trying to work out how to regain control of the situation.

"I think you know who we are." Jane's voice is like steel. "So you know there is no point trying to surprise us. Or run from us. Or fight."

Demetri laughs from the doorway. He would love Victoria to try any of those things. His cavalier attitude makes me bristle. Victoria is mine.

"We seek to know your intentions here," Jane continues. "Specifically, whether the _illegal _mayhem you have created is directed at a local clan."

Victoria hisses in my direction, her eyes flashing in fury. I crouch low, in response, growl rumbling in my throat. Jane gives a negligent wave of her hand, knocking me back a step. It's nothing but a slap, compared to what she is capable of, but it is a stark reminder. Victoria grins in something like triumph.

"They killed my mate. I will have my revenge."

"How are you doing this?" I demand roughly. "How has Alice not seen?"

She looks positively smug now. "I haven't made a decision. Not one." She looks at Riley, still curled in a ball at Demetri's feet. Clearly his feelings for her are not reciprocated. He is nothing but a pawn. Jane takes this moment to release him from her grip, and Riley lets out a shuddering breath, taking in his surroundings. Jane crouches in front of him. "Do you know who we are?" His eyes dart around the room in panic. He has no idea, and shakes his head rapidly. "Have you created any vampires, Riley?"

"N-n-no," he stutters, his voice ragged with fear. "I just find people for _her_, and I try to keep them under control, after they change..."

Jane shakes her head in disapproval. "Well, you haven't done a very good job of _that_, now, have you Riley?"

Riley opens his mouth as if he is about to respond, but thinks better of it.

"And what understanding do you have of the Law, Riley?"

His thoughts are confused, terrified. "I...I...don't know what you mean..."

Jane makes a disapproving noise, rising back to her feet and turning her back on him. "Get out."

Her dismissal is unexpected. Demetri and I both look at her in confusion. "You're letting him go?" My voice is incredulous. I can't understand what Jane can be thinking. No one gets this kind of reprieve. I am firsthand proof of this. So is Sarah.

Jane doesn't even bother to look at me. "He is, for all intents and purposes, an innocent. He cannot be found guilty of breaking a law he knew nothing about." She whirls sharply on her heel, looking down at Riley. "Do you understand, now, that what you have been doing is wrong? That creating vampires for no purpose, and leaving them untrained, and thirsty, and roaming a city at will, risks our exposure?"

Riley is quaking. He nods rapidly.

"And will you leave this place, and live out your days in anonymity, such that I never have occasion to hear of you again?"

My mouth falls open. Riley nods enthusiastically, scrambling to his feet.

"Then get out. Now. And run faster than you have ever had reason to do so before."

Riley freezes for a second, looking over Jane's shoulder at Victoria. His thoughts are full of devotion and longing. Her thoughts are full of contempt, believing him nothing but pathetic.

Jane is losing patience. "This is not an offer I will make twice." And with that Riley, rushes past Demetri and out the door, faster than the wind.

I take a step toward Jane in fury, and she stares up at me, her expression impassive. She races her hand and I think for a second she is about to hit me again, but the gesture is just to get me to pause. "Edward. Riley may not have known what he was doing, but this creature clearly did. She's all yours."

Victoria and I both gasp in shocked unison, and she scrambles across the bed toward the window, blocked instantly by Sarah. I feel like this has to be some sort of trick. That I'm missing some vital clue here. Demetri gives me a surly expression, thinking, _Well, what are you waiting for?_

What, indeed. Victoria intended to kill Bella. And she intended to do it by raising an army against my family. Whatever Jane's motives, the outcome is clear. I lunge across the room, and Victoria lets out a short scream. Her bright red eyes meet mine. Her mind is a terrified plea. My teeth sink into her pale skin, tearing across her throat, and yanking her head clear from her shoulders with a sickening crunch.


	16. Chase

**Thanks to katinki and hollelujah1 for their recs, and to all the lovely readers who have dropped by as a result.**

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><p>I'd thought it would feel more satisfying, but Victoria's lifeless form provides none of the closure I'd expected. I drop her shoulders, unwilling to have her icy skin in my grasp for even a second longer.<p>

_Disappointing, Edward_. Jane smirks at me from the doorway. _At least you could have taken the time to make her suffer a little._

I stare at her calm, stony expression. Jane is continuing to actively conceal her thoughts, and I feel like somehow she's pulled the wool over my eyes. Sensing my need to end Victoria, and offering me just what I wanted. It feels like a distraction. Like I've taken some terrible kind of bait.

Demetri kicks idly at Victoria's head, which has rolled in front of him. "Let's just light up the whole house. She's hardly worth any more effort than that."

Sarah finds some kerosene in a shed and the house in the clearing is soon a crackling fire. She stands beside me as we watch to make sure it takes hold. _It's almost over, Edward. Victoria's dead. Riley's gone. We'll clean up the newborns, and complete your plan. You'll be home before you know it._

I wish I shared an ounce of her confidence.

We run back to Seattle as dawn is breaking over the horizon. The weather is against us, and the clear blue skies and sparkling spring sunshine mean we have to hole up in a hotel for the day. Demetri is restless, pacing the room like a caged tiger. No one speaks. It is a long twelve hours.

As soon as the sky turns red overhead, we go straight to the port so that Demetri can pick up the trail, leading us to the outskirts of town, in a neighborhood full of foreclosed properties. Boarded up, the lawns overgrown, the house would once have been grand, but is now covered in graffiti, its only uncovered windows long since smashed. Inside, the scent of vampires is almost overwhelming. I profess no real skill as a tracker, but even I can pick out over a dozen distinct trails crossing in the main room alone.

The house is empty. And disgusting. A half-burnt vampire corpse lies in the main room, surrounded by ashes. The downstairs windows are covered, taped over with cardboard boxes. I can smell old, dried human blood on the furniture, like some kind of depraved charnel house.

"They're out feeding?" Sarah asks, kicking at a pile of trash in one corner.

Demetri strides around the rooms and out the front door, walking circuits of the property to work out the freshest routes. For some reason, Jane shows none of her customary interest in this process. She stands like a statue in the kitchen, occasionally glancing at her watch as if she's expecting someone. Or something.

I sit on the sofa to wait, my knee jiggling with nervous energy. I feel anxious and strung out. The ground seems to be shifting under me. This is supposed to be a routine mission, and yet nothing is unfolding the way that it should.

I inhale deeply again, trying to calm myself by identifying and counting off the various vampires who have passed through this room, trying to get a sense of the size of this group. All of a sudden my throat constricts in horror and a ferocious growl escapes my throat, causing Sarah to look around from the doorway in fright.

"Edward?"

I'm overcome, raging like an animal, tearing the room apart. Throwing the sofa cushions behind me, overturning an armchair.

_"EDWARD!"_

I push past her and rush down the stairs to a dark basement, kicking the door in so hard that it splinters around me. There are sleeping bags, and a few moldy-looking mattresses. My hands tear though them as I ravage the room, hell-bent with singular purpose. Piles of comics. A stereo and a television, both smash as I shove them out of the way. And suddenly, there it is. Cast aside like a rag on an old shelf against the back wall. Calling out to me like a siren's unwavering song, the scent of it lighting a fire in my throat and striking fear in my heart. Bella's sweater.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and snarl furiously, shaking it loose.

"Edward! Calm down!" Sarah urges, grabbing again at my upper arm, and swiveling me to look at her.

_Get it under CONTROL!_Her mind screams at me, her eyes wide with fear.

Jane and Demetri have followed her down the stairs, and are staring around the room at my path of destruction with bewildered expressions. Demetri takes in the red cloth in my hand, inhaling deeply.

"A human girl," he concludes, curiously. "She has not been here. The clothing came from elsewhere."

My throat feels thick, and I have to stop breathing for several long minutes to try and get my mind to clear.

Jane cocks her head and narrows her eyes at me. "_Your_ human girl, Edward? I remember her fragrance being quite..._entrancing_."

I clutch the sweater to my chest possessively. I want to slap Jane across her smug little face for even referring to Bella. I am so panicked and confused to find this here. My mind is racing, and none of the fragmentary thoughts will come together to show me a complete picture.

"What's going on here?" I spit at Jane in frustration.

"Isn't it obvious? That redhead wanted revenge. She needed to give her little army some direction. Seems that the smell of your delicious little human was the perfect _incentive_."

I grip the soft wool like a vise. This is so much worse than I'd imagined. Not only had Victoria wanted to goad my family into battle, but she'd been to Forks. She'd stolen Bella's clothing, which meant she'd been _impossibly _close to Bella. The realization washes over me like ice water. I've been so foolish. Here, all this time, I thought that I was keeping her _safe_by being in Volterra. I've done nothing of the sort.

"But if that's true..." Sarah interrupts, sounding puzzled. "I mean, we saw them out hunting. They weren't chasing Bella. They were just feeding. They didn't seem to have any purpose."

I listen to Sarah's thoughts, trying to work out where she is going with this. She's thinking about the pack of young vampires. How unregimented they looked. How chaotic. She stares at me with concern. _Victoria said she hadn't made a single decision. Who scented the newborns, Edward? And when?_

My stomach sinks.

"Riley..." I manage to croak out.

Demetri looks around the room and nods. "He's been here, obviously. And often. The trail is very fresh. But then, we only just dispensed with him. It could have been any time in the last couple of days."

"But we _didn't_dispense with him!" I growl, glaring thunderously at Jane. Her expression is unperturbed, her thoughts clear and calm. She says nothing.

Demetri gives a disinterested shrug. "I have the trail; they left in a group heading south. If he's with them, we'll kill him too. They're brand new, and thirst-crazed, and out of control. They'll be snacking on the first food they find."

I realize we can't waste another second discussing this. I look down at Bella's clothing. I won't leave it here in this filthy hovel, surrounded by the odor of death, but I can't really take it with me either. As if sensing my indecision, Sarah hands me a lighter. I take the stairs up to the main floor two at a time, pausing only to set fire to the sweater in the kitchen sink. The red wool blackens and smokes. Jane looks at me like I'm insane, rolling her eyes with disdain. I don't care. I push past her and shove at Demetri's shoulder. "Come on. Show me the way."

We run south, but the trail veers almost immediately, away from the city and across a thin strip of highway before doubling back on itself and heading due north. I pull up in confusion. It takes Demetri a minute or two to realize that I've stopped.

"What?" he snarls in frustration. Once he is tracking he hates being distracted from the chase. I kick at an empty soda can, which arcs across the bare earth with a clatter, and look around in confusion. The lights of the Seattle skyline are behind us. An eighteen-wheeler thunders past headed for Canada. My thoughts are a whirlwind.

"Why would they change direction?"

Jane scowls impatiently as she stalks back toward me. "Why are you making this so hard? The more time we stand around listening to your _theories_, the more time these vampires are escaping our justice."

I shake my head, irritated. "No, Demetri was right. Newborns would have headed straight for the city. Why would they turn away from the easy pickings they're used to?"

Sarah looks at me sympathetically. "We won't know until we find them, Edward."

I give her a small nod, gesturing begrudgingly at Demetri to continue as we break back into a dead sprint, blurring along the edge of the highway and into a sparse stretch of forest. As we run, the fear begins to claw its way across my skin. After half an hour the forest peters out along the coastline, and the trail runs down a steep hill to a long, rocky stretch of shore. And ends. At the waters' edge.

Demetri hisses in anger, picking up a nearby log of driftwood and hurling it angrily out to sea, where it splashes soundlessly, over a mile away.

I drop to my knees, staring hopeless out at the dark water.

"We will have to split up," Demetri groans. "Run north and south around the Sound until we pick up the trail."

"No," Jane says. "We have no way to contact each other. We can't risk it. We'll go north first and then head back the other way if we don't find them."

My fingers claw into the damp stones and sand, fury causing my nerves to jangle. "Don't be _ridiculous_," I roar, startling even Jane. "We _know_ where they are going! _They are swimming to Forks!_"

Jane starts to protest, but Sarah interrupts her. "Edward's right. No pack of disorganized, thirsty newborns runs a diversion by heading into the water. They have a purpose, and it seems reasonable to suppose that purpose is Bella." Sarah is looking down at me, her eyes bright with concern. _What do you want to happen here, Edward? Do you want me to order them to give chase? Is it too dangerous?_

Demetri nods at Sarah's logic. "This means we need to speak with Aro. This is well outside our mandate. We are not here to get involved in a war."

My breathing is shallow and frantic. I need to get to Forks, and to my family.

"We need to warn Carlisle." I stare at Sarah with a pleading expression. She's the only one who can fix this without revealing our hand.

Jane shakes her head vehemently. "Aro put me in charge. He trusts my decisions. Nothing about this mission has changed. We track and dispense with the newborns. We need to be methodical about this. They were heading north until now. We continue to follow the Sound north."

Something is warring in Demetri's thoughts. He is not convinced by what Jane is saying, and doesn't understand why she's not prepared to clarify our orders with Volterra. I look again at Sarah, willing her to intervene.

"Demetri is right," she says in a quiet voice, causing Jane to turn quickly on her heel and glare at her. "We will call Aro, and we will call Carlisle."

Jane blinks rapidly for a second, her mouth opening and closing as if she is about to say something, but has forgotten what. "Fine," she manages finally, turning and stomping away up the beach.

"Where are you going?" I ask, getting to my feet. I am too afraid to hope. I need to start running, and now. I need to get to Bella. But Jane is an unpredictable threat.

"I don't have a cell phone hiding in my shoe, Edward," she calls over her shoulder, sounding short-tempered.

Demetri takes one last look out to sea, and kneels to the ground inhaling deeply, memorizing the trail, before he turns and jogs after her. Sarah gives my hand a small squeeze. I mouth the words _thank you_at her silently, and we follow.

We find a truck stop after a few miles, tucking our robes out of sight in the foliage. Demetri follows Jane to the payphone. His thoughts are a mass of confusion and suspicion. She gives him an irritated expression, but does not send him away. Sarah and I wait a few yards apart, keeping out of the glare of the lights overhead. After a few minutes, Demetri looks down at Jane in shock and yanks the receiver away from her, placing it to his own ear. He says a few words and then hangs up the call abruptly, and the two of them walk back to us. Jane gives absolutely nothing away, but Demetri's face is worried.

"What is it?"

"They're already on their way," he says, sounding startled.

"Here?" I ask in shock. "You mean Alec? Felix?"

Demetri shakes his head. "I mean all of them. Even the wives."

I glance between him and Jane with a start, unable to wrap my mind around this new development. "You must be mistaken." I know from Carlisle that the Volturi haven't been out of Volterra in hundreds of years, and the wives _never_travel.

"I spoke to Gianna myself, Edward. They're on their way here."

I stare at Jane, who looks back serenely, not a single sign that she is at all surprised by this development. Her thoughts are impassive, empty.

"Why would they be coming?" Sarah asks the obvious question. _They don't know what we know, Edward. Why would they already have left?_

My head is pounding. None of this makes any sense. I feel like tight bands of steel are wrapped around my ribcage, squeezing at my chest. All of this is getting away from me. I am nothing but a pawn on a chessboard, and worse, it seems so are my family. _So is Bella_.

"Perhaps they have other sources of information," Jane responds coolly. "In any event, it seems that Edward will get to see his coven after all."


	17. Resolve

"It's not that funny." Emmett groans, his expression surly, as he dusts himself off and extracts a twig from his collar. I can't help it. I'm laughing so hard it's difficult to catch my breath. I collapse over into Jake's side, his eyes - even in wolf form - twinkling with mirth.

"It really is..." I gasp. "She...it was like...Rose threw you like a _ragdoll_."

It feels good to laugh after so long, even in the midst of all this preparation for the fight. And the look on Emmett's face as Rosalie flipped him and hurled him into a copse of trees was just too much. Tears slide down my face and even Rosalie starts to chuckle.

"I really did," she taunts with a grin, making a show of dusting her knuckles and examining her manicured nails.

Emmett growls and moves as if to lunge for a rematch, but Jasper steps between them. "Enough!" he chides, but he's winking at me. "We have more work to do."

It seems like we've done nothing but work. Or at least, the Cullens and the wolves have, training more or less nonstop as the hours bleed into days. I feel completely useless. Sitting out here in the forest, wrapped up in an absurd number of layers at Alice's insistence, and praying the people I care about will eventually be okay. I've lost track of time a little. It was Carlisle who called Charlie and asked if it would be okay for me to accompany Alice on one of the family's "camping trips". It seems the good doctor still has some sway with my dad.

With such a short amount of time until Alice believes the newborns will arrive, Carlisle has only been able to contact a small number of reinforcements. Garrett, a nomad, is the first to arrive. His long sandy hair is tied back and his bright red eyes take in the wolves with caution. However, it's not long until his adventurous streak appears to win out, and he takes to quizzing Sam every time he is in human form about the tribe and its history.

Carmen and Eleazar are the next to arrive, and bring the distressing news that the rest of the Denali coven will not be joining us. Carmen is apologetic, gripping Carlisle's hands in her own. "Irina is hurt, _mi hermano_. She loved Laurent more than any of us realized, and she cannot come here and be among those who killed him." Carlisle nods silently, but it is easy to see that the sisters' decision had wounded him deeply.

Eleazar, too, is fascinated by the wolves, but regards them far more warily than Garrett. He spends a long time having a heated conversation with Jasper in Spanish before he is willing to join the others in preparing for the fight.

"Eleazar is cautious because of his background," Esme explains, as she puts a plate of pasta in front of me that evening. "He was with the Volturi for a long time."

I suck in a sharp breath. "What?" I demand, struggling in my head to picture the beautiful dark-haired man outside wrapped in a long, ashy cloak.

Esme puts her cool hand on top of mine to comfort me. "Eleazar believes very strongly in the law. He felt he had an important part to play in upholding it. The Volturi are not, perhaps, the villains you think them to be. I know your time with them was very scary, Bella. But in our world, they command a great deal of respect. It is considered very...prestigious...to serve in the Guard."

I shake my head to clear the vision of Aro's chilling stare. Prestigious or not, they took Edward from me. I cannot think of them as benevolent rulers.

Peter and Charlotte arrive as night falls, each drawing Jasper into a tight embrace. This unexpected display of emotion makes a thick lump rise up in my throat. So many people I love, putting so much on the line. And despite their almost constant reassurance, it still feels like on some level this is my fault. If I'd never left Phoenix, never met any of them, would this confrontation still be inevitable?

The increased number of vampires makes the wolves extremely restless and uncomfortable. They will only phase into human form when absolutely necessary to communicate, and will not come anywhere near the house.

I tug a woolen hat down over my ears, pack some leftovers, and set out to find Jake. When he sees me trudging along the tree line he disappears briefly, returning human, barefoot and shirtless.

"It's so cold!" I protest, more uncomfortable at being in such close proximity to him with only his shorts on, than worried about his health. He runs a hand through his close-cropped hair with a small shrug. We sit together on the rough bark of a fallen log, looking back at the bright lights of the Cullen homestead through the trees. He devours the food I brought him in minutes.

"Five more?" he asks, and I know he is being diplomatic by refraining from calling them leeches. Or worse.

I nod. "Is it going to be a problem?"

He shrugs again. "We've never seen anything like this. The elders are worried that it might mean more of us will phase. Seth has, and he's so young." He reaches for my hand and I let him take it. I am wearing thick mittens, and the touch doesn't seem intimate, but my spine still stiffens a little. We haven't spoken about anything but the forthcoming battle since his declaration the other night. I'm grateful that he hasn't pressed me, but instead of being a source of comfort, being around him now makes me feel guilty. I haven't been honest with him, and I feel like I'm leading him on in some way.

"Jake, I..." I'm not sure what I want to say. That I care about him too, but not in the same way? That I need him to be safe, that I need this to be over. That I miss the time when it was just the two of us, the rain on the barn roof and the smell of brake fluid on his hands.

"Jake!" I'm interrupted by Jasper, calling as he strides across the lawn with Peter and Eleazar trailing behind him. "Can you ask the wolves if they are fed and rested? We need to start up again."

Jake nods, and gives my hand a squeeze. "Catch you later, Bells."

Before I can say anything further he has slipped away into the trees.

Esme brings me another scarf, and walks with me to the clearing where the others have been training. We sit together as Peter and Jasper run through more details about newborn fighting techniques and strategy. Despite my protests, I start to feel cold and tired, and am thinking about heading inside when the vampires around me suddenly freeze.

A shrill cry comes from behind us and Jasper whirls on his heel with a hiss, as Alice barrels through the trees, launching herself into his arms. Her face is a mask of confusion, eyes wild, and he squeezes her close, smoothing her hair and trying to calm her.

"What is it? What's happened?"

Jasper's calm is flooding from him and reaching all of us, like a suffocating blanket that makes it difficult to focus.

"They're coming," she whispers, her voice tired and broken. "They're all coming."

I don't understand. That's why we're out here in the frost, running drill after drill. Because the newborns are on their way.

"The Volturi," Alice clarifies. "Aro, Caius, Marcus, every member of the guard, even the wives."

Peter drops the tree trunk he has been wielding with a surprised thud, and Esme lets out a gasp. I don't understand what has happened. The vampires seem to be devastated by Alice's news.

"This is good, right?" I ask, confused. "They must be coming because of the army?" I don't understand. If the Volturi are coming, there are more reinforcements. It must mean that these newborns will be dealt with easily. It must mean that my family will be _safe_.

"The wives never leave Volterra," Jasper contradicts in a flat voice. "Never. Not during the southern rebellion. Not when the Romanians tried to overthrow them. Not even when they were hunting the immortal children. Never."

Alice clutches at him, grabbing handfuls of his sweater as he pulls her close again. "It's strange, Jazz" she whispers. "It's like...the decision has already been made, but they're waiting on something. They're waiting for their reason."

Jasper is shaking his head, his brow furrowed. "It doesn't make any _sense_. Why would they all come? They have a unit of the Guard on its way. Why would the Volturi leave Italy for this?"

Eleazar suddenly lets out a groan and slumps against a nearby rock, his face contorted. Carmen is quickly at his side, crouching beside him. "What is it, _mi amor_?"

Everyone moves quickly to circle them. Eleazar doesn't seem to be in pain, but rather, deeply shocked and unhappy. "My God, my God," he murmurs. "Carmen, what have I done?"

Carlisle kneels at his side. "What is it, old friend?"

Eleazar looks paler than I thought possible for a vampire, his gold eyes wild. "I was trying to understand why so many of the Volturi would come to deal with this problem. It's not their way. Certainly, if Alice is correct, this is a large number of newborns, but the Guard have easily dispatched larger."

Carlisle nods, waiting for him to continue. The wolves are pacing behind us, their breath fogging in the still night air.

"Aro does not often personally attend an expedition," Eleazar says. "You know this as well as I do. But in the past, when Aro wanted _something _in particular, it was never long before evidence turned up proving that a coven had committed some unpardonable crime. The ancients would decide to go along to watch the Guard mete out justice. And then, once the coven was all but destroyed, Aro would grant a pardon to one member whose thoughts, he would claim, were particularly repentant. Always, it would turn out that this vampire had the gift Aro had admired. Always, this person was given a place with the Guard. The gifted vampire was won over quickly, always so grateful for the honor."

Cold dread starts to creep around my heart. I think back to our time in the Grand Hall in Volterra, and the bargain struck as I screamed in vain. A bargain struck so that Aro could have Edward's gift within his retinue.

"I can only think that the reason Aro had decided to come himself, to bring so many with him, is because his goal is not punishment but _acquisition_," Eleazar says. "He needs to be there to control the situation, but he needs the entire Guard for protection. He cannot leave anyone unattended in Volterra, so they all come together. How else could he be sure to preserve the gift that he wants? He must want it very badly."

My mouth falls open. All I can think about is the way Aro had asked after the Cullens. Edward's cold and measured responses. My heart begins to pound.

"Even if this is true," Carlisle is saying, and his voice seems far away over the throb of blood pulsing thunderously in my ears. "It was Edward that Aro wanted, and he has him. I don't see..."

"Alice..." My voice is hoarse. Everyone turns to look at me, expectant. My tongue feels thick, and it is hard to form the words. "In the Grand Hall, in Volterra. It wasn't just Edward's gift that Aro remarked on. He kept asking after _Alice_."

Jasper snarls protectively, imprisoning his tiny wife in his arms. Alice's eyes are bright, but her stare is vacant. She bites at her lip briefly before focusing. "I can't tell. I can't see their reasoning at all." She kicks out at the icy ground in frustration. "And I can't see what happens when they get here because..." She waves at the wolves surrounding us, quiet on their haunches.

Eleazar gets slowly to his feet, addressing the whole group. "I think the Volturi were waiting for this – for some pretext. They couldn't know what form their excuse would come in, but the plan  
>was already in place for when it did come. That's why Alice sees their decision before<br>she sees what will trigger it. The decision was already made, just waiting for the justification."

"If the Volturi are abusing the trust all immortals have placed in them..." Carlisle sounds as horrified as I feel.

"It doesn't matter," Eleazar concludes. "Who would believe it? And even if others could be convinced that the Volturi are exploiting their power, how would it make any difference? No one can stand against them. We cannot stand against them."

There is a sudden rush of movement around us, and Sam and Jacob step back into the clearing, having phased.

"Is he right?" Sam demands of Jasper. "Will we be so outnumbered as to lose?"

Jasper is thoughtful, stroking a calming hand up and down Alice's arm as he considers this new information. "We will be outnumbered, absolutely. But if Eleazar is right, the Volturi need a reason. They won't risk word getting out that they are acting outside the law. They will need an excuse to punish our family."

And in that instant, a sudden wave of clarity floods over me. I can see the tendons in Jasper's neck strain as he tries not to turn in my direction. I can see the rise and fall of Jake's chest as he breathes. My throat is dry, and it makes it hard to swallow to speak. "It's me," I finally manage. "I'm the reason."

Esme is instantly at my side, but I shrug off the arm she tries to put around my shoulders, taking a rapid step back into the center of the clearing. Alone.

"You know I'm right. They will say that you harbored me. That you broke the law by revealing yourselves to me."

Their faces are contrite, but none of the Cullens makes a move to disagree with me. Except Alice.

"Bella, _no_! That was the deal Edward made!" she insists, tugging free of Jasper's embrace. Stepping toward me and then faltering. Her voice falling an octave as she murmurs, "That's why he _stayed_!"

There is a long silence, which only Carlisle is prepared to break. "If Eleazar is right, Alice, Aro is not honoring that bargain."

His words are like the final piece of a puzzle being pressed into place. A certainty of conviction wells up inside of me. I feel resolute and whole, like I have a purpose for the first time since we left Europe.

"Then you need to change me, Carlisle. We need to take away their reason."

* * *

><p><strong>Unexpected delays were unexpected. Thanks for hanging in there with me. Four chapters and an epi to go. Let me know what you think!<strong>


	18. Prepare

"Then you need to change me, Carlisle. We need to take away their reason."

A silence fills the clearing. Everyone is staring at me as if I have sprouted two heads. Jacob, in particular, looks as though he is waiting for the punch line. As if I am about to say, "Ha ha, just kidding." The silence stretches. Nobody moves.

"I'm serious, Carlisle," I press on, trying to make them understand that I've thought this through. It's as obvious to me now as it was all that time ago in Volterra. "If the Volturi are coming here on the pretext of punishing you for revealing yourselves to a human, then we need to eliminate that pretext. If I'm no longer human, there's nothing to punish."

Jake lets out a hiss. "Bella, don't be ridiculous. We don't care what their pretext is, if we're even guessing right about their motives. You're never going to become one of them." He's half-chuckling as he says it: an uneasy, confused sound. His eyes plead with me to let him off the hook; to tell everyone that I don't mean it. I shift uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

"This is all because of me," I insist, my voice sounding stronger than I expect. I need them to understand that I'm not taking blame on my shoulders. I'm just drawing everyone's attention to the truth left unspoken for too long. "The newborns are on their way here because of me. The Volturi may attack because of me. My _humanity _is at the center of all of this." I look around the group, daring anyone to contradict me. No one speaks. "This coven lived in piece for _decades_ before I moved to Forks. This pack, for even longer. Whether you care to admit it or not, it's time to face up to the truth. If we can avert a war this way; if I can save the lives of the people here in this place, whom I love with all my heart, then this is the choice I make."

Carlisle is already shaking his head.

"Alice has seen it Carlisle, you know that. Edward confirmed it. You know that in at least one version of the future I am like you."

It's Alice's turn to protest. "Bella, no. With Edward..."

"This has nothing to do with Edward," I interrupt her. "I am not making this choice for him. I am making this choice for me."

"This is _bullshit_!" Jake snarls. Sam reaches to grab at his arm but he shakes it off, stalking across the frosty grass to stand in front of me, glowering. "This is _absolute _bullshit, Bella. You're not giving up on life. You're not giving up on _US_."

His eyes are dark, and flashing with anger, but it's pain that leaks out as he says 'us', and my heart clenches.

"It's not giving up, Jacob. It's taking control. It's doing the one thing I can to make this right. And it's joining the family I know I belong to."

His frustration starts to build, and a growl rumbles low in his chest, his muscles tensing and the air around him shimmering with energy.

"And what about your _actual _family, Bella? What about Charlie and Renee?"

"Jacob..." Sam's tone is low, his voice warning.

Jake leans in close, and I don't break his gaze. His eyes searching for something; for something I can't offer him.

"You know how I feel," he urges. "You _told _me...you wanted me safe! You..." His voice cracks a little, thick with anxiety. Wounded.

A lump rises in my throat. "I...Jake you _know _that I care about you. Of course I want you safe...I..." I can't think of a way to make him understand, and I hate that this is happening here, surrounded by his pack. That because of his very nature, he has no privacy, no retreat.

"I know that this is my future, Jacob. I'm sorry."

He clenches and unclenches his fists, and I see him struggling to keep his breathing under control. Abruptly, he turns on his heel and sprints for the tree line, tearing off his shirt as his human roar morphs into an agonized howl.

Sam gives me a small, sad look, before he and the other wolves circle to follow. Seth pauses at the edge of the trees, torn between staying and going. Eventually even he breaks into a trot and disappears.

I feel spent, sick with guilt, and my knees are shaking. Esme is suddenly at my side guiding me to a nearby log to sit. Carlisle crouches in front of me, taking both of my hands in his.

"Bella, your intentions are good. Noble, even. But I cannot do what you ask."

A wave of insecurity washes over me. It hadn't really occurred to me that he would say no, but now it seems ridiculous that I'd thought for even a second he would consent. "You don't..." I look up at the concerned faces of the Cullens encircling me. "You don't want me?"

"No, of course that's not it. I'd be honored to have you as a daughter."

Esme sits beside me, stroking my hair briefly. "Bella, we already think of you as one of our own."

Carlisle nods with smile. "But the change, it's ...a savage experience. Painful, violent. It takes days, during which you will be burning up with the transformation. Days that we do not have. Someone will need to be with you the entire time, and you know what a distraction it will pose for those of us who will still have to face the newborns, even if your change succeeds in diverting the Volturi."

Jasper places a hand on my shoulder, and a wave of gratitude and something else flows over me. "We also have to think about the treaty, Bella. The wolves - you have already seen that your decision would ...unsettle them. I'll be honest; we need them on our side. Any one of us bites you, and there is no guarantee what will happen."

"Besides," Rosalie continues, her voice cool but not unkind. "You haven't really had a chance to think this through. What you're asking? It's something no one should choose for themselves. You have your whole life ahead of you. The chance for a family; the chance to grow old with grandchildren playing in your front yard." Emmett steps toward her, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze. She looks up at him gratefully. I realize how little I understand Rose, her reactions never as I predict.

Carlisle pats my knee gently. "It is a brave thing that you offer, Bella, but we cannot accept. And until Edward..."

"Stop." I grit out. Disappointment is still welling up inside me, even as I accept their unassailable logic. "This isn't about Edward. I'll agree that now is not the right time. But whether he comes home or not, my future is with you." I look around at each of them. 'With all of you. This _is_what I want, for myself. And when all this is behind us, and we can do it safely..."

Carlisle nods, slowly. "Then we would welcome you with open arms, Bella."

Alice gives me a fierce hug, and I cling to her tiny form, inhaling her sweet, unnatural scent. My heart feels fit to burst.

"And we will not stand in your way." Sam's voice behind me is a surprise, as he and the others emerge from the forest. Jake is not with them. Sam's expression is serious. "I will confess, I do not understand your decision, Bella, but I see that you make it freely. And I have come to know that these..." He gestures at the Cullens, searching for a diplomatic way to describe them and failing. "They are not my enemy. They value human life just as we do. If you choose to join them, we will not consider the treaty broken."

"Thank you," I whisper, my chest expanding painfully with gratitude and emotion.

"We return to keep preparing," Sam says gruffly, and looks expectantly at Jasper. Jasper, meanwhile, continues to stare at me, lost in thought.

"What is it?" Alice asks, finally, as his silence starts to become uncomfortable.

"Well, Bella was right."

"What do you mean?"

"She is kind of at the center of things. We know that the army is scented, and will be looking for her. If we can control the circumstances under which we meet them, we might be able to turn that to our advantage."

I perk up a little. I desperately want to be useful, and if there is a way that I can help, the risk reduces that everyone will now turn on me and suggest I should be packed off to Florida after all.

"If the newborns reach the area and smell Bella's blood, they'll go crazy. It might be enough. They'll be wild, and out of control, we will then have the upper hand. They will follow Bella's trail right to us."

"Certainly not," Esme's voice is steely. "It's far too dangerous. There is no way we are putting any human in the path of an army of newborns, and certainly not Bella."

"Maybe just the scent of her would be enough?" Alice suggests. "We could run a trail with her now, and then we can hide her somewhere safe?"

Jasper shakes his head, frowning in concentration. "No. The newborns might fall for it, but we have to assume that there is someone with them. Whoever made them. We need to confuse them with a false trail. And somehow we need to mask the fact that she's left the clearing."

Emmett snorts. "Dude, that's easy."

Everyone turns to look at him; his dimpled grin making it seem like the solution should be obvious. "The _wolves_, man. They reek. No one's going to go anywhere near their trail."

Embry and Paul step toward Emmett scowling. He immediately raises his hands up to placate them. "Hey, no offense man. I just mean, no newborn vamp is going to be sniffing along after one of you voluntarily."

"It might work," Jasper muses.

"Let's try it" Sam moves quickly to my side. "I'll carry Bella, and one of you try to track us."

He looks down at me for permission. I'm determined to be helpful anyway that I can, and gratefully slide my arms around his neck as he swoops me up in his arms and trots into the trees.

Sam running is quite unlike a vampire, but still much faster than is really comfortable. I jostle against his hip, self-conscious about how much I must weigh and hyper-aware of being this close to his naked chest. After about ten minutes we loop round in a circle and run back to the house.

The Cullens are all waiting, and Jasper has a sly grin on his face. "It works. It's not perfect. If you really get close to the trail, you can smell Bella mixed up in there, but it's off-putting enough, and more importantly _foreign _enough, that none of them will."

Sam nods, pleased. "Then we choose a place to fight, one that works to our advantage. Bella can leave a false trail to the site, and then I'll carry her out, to somewhere safe."

"No. I will."

Jacob steps from the trees. His voice is cold and hard. He stares at Sam, willing him to disagree, to overrule him. Sam pauses, looking between the two of us. "Fine. Seth will relieve you once we know the trail has worked and they are on their way."

The young wolf looks like he is about to protest, but both Jake and Sam turn to glare at him, and he almost whimpers as he takes a small step back.

Alice bounds forward before the tension can become too thick. Clutching me by the hand, she pulls me toward the garage. "Come on Bella, we have _loads_of camping gear. We have to keep buying it from Newtons to keep up appearances. We'll make sure you'll stay plenty warm."

I'm grateful to leave Jake behind. She isn't kidding, and it isn't long before she has Emmett loaded down like a packhorse with a tent and arctic sleeping bag, sleep roll, and backpack full of provisions. He and Rose take off into the night to set up camp in the mountains, somewhere safe and easily defended if things ...I try not to think about the idea of little Seth having to come between me and whatever is headed our way.

Jasper runs me north with Alice, to where she can best approximate the newborns will come from. We take our time walking back, and I trail my hands through the undergrowth, rubbing my shoulder against the occasional tree. It occurs to me I can do better than that, and I stoop to pick up a sharp stone. I'm just about to scratch my skin to draw a little blood when Alice's cool hand clamps sharply around my wrist. "Bella!"

"I just thought a little blood would help! It will be a much stronger scent."

"Trust me; your scent is plenty strong enough. And just 'a little blood' is quite a _lot _more than Jasper can handle," she chides. I feel instantly guilty; having forgotten for a moment the strain the Jasper is under just being around me day to day. I start to apologize, but he smiles sadly and waves me on in front of him.

When we reach the clearing Jasper and Sam have selected, Jake is waiting for us, wearing only his shorts and a scowl. I have to take a deep breath. Spending this time with him seems more daunting right now than facing down a crazed vampire army.

"Ready?" he says, his voice lifeless, and I struggle to meet his gaze as I nod, turning to give Alice a hug. There don't seem to be any words that are appropriate. It's only now that I realize I didn't say anything to the others before we left the house. I start to feel panicked. I should have...what, said _goodbye_? The thought is crippling and I find it hard to catch my breath. Suddenly Jasper is at my side, tucking my hair behind my ears, and straightening my scarf. Helping the tight bands around my chest unfurl. "It's okay, Bella. Everyone is going to be fine. "

I want to believe him, want to believe in more than just his gift enfolding me and soothing me.

"Tell them..." I trail off, looking hopelessly at Alice, who juts her chin out as she nods, her eyes bright with emotion. I know how helpless she feels; unable to give me, to give any of us, the reassurance we crave. I take a deep breath and turn back to Jake.

"Let's go."

I fit myself against his chest as he lifts me, pressing my face into the heat of his neck, and closing my eyes. His hands feel huge and warm, even through my layers of clothing, and I can his heart thud comfortingly as he runs, away from the clearing and up into the trees toward the mountains. We don't speak. I listen to his even breathing, and the sound of the wind in the trees around us. It's possible that I even doze off, so exhausted by the events that have been unfolding for what seems like an eternity now, because it seems like only minutes and Jake is lowering me to the ground in front of a small tent. We're extremely high up, and the air is frigid. Jake looks up at the sky with concern. "There's a storm coming. God, Bella this was a terrible idea, I don't know why I let those monsters talk me into it."

I tug my hat further down over my ears, choosing to ignore his slur. "It's going to be okay. This camping gear is rated for far worse weather than this. Plus," I smile, aiming for levity. "I have my own personal furnace with me, right?"

"When it suits you, right Bella?" He snaps, his voice bitter. "Just until you're done with me, and can kill yourself."

I suck in a pained gasp. I don't know what to say. He sounds so hurt, and I know that I've done that to him.

He stares at his feet for a while, before sighing and running an impatient hand through his hair.  
>"Come on, it's freezing. Let's not kill you before you have a chance to do it yourself." He unzips the tent and holds the flap so that I can go in ahead of him. I crouch low, kicking off my boots and deciding to keep all my layers on as I wriggle into the downy sleeping bag. Jake stretches out beside me on another sleeping roll, zipping the tent closed behind him. The wind howls outside.<p>

"You're angry." I manage finally, to break the silence more than anything, stating the obvious.

"Why wouldn't I be? You know how I feel Bella; I've been nothing but honest with you. You know that I fell in love with you last summer while _he_was away. I saw what he did to you, how it ruined you, and I waited while you pulled yourself back together. Hell, I tried to help in every way that I could."

I think of that black, empty time. It seems so long ago now, so much has happened in the interim.

"And when you came back from Italy, you said it would be different. And at first I didn't believe you, but I've watched you Bella. I've seen you put up with Charlie's demands, earn his trust back, and commit to your time on the Rez, and I've seen you start to look like Bella I know and love again."

He sighs, scrubbing at his eyes with the heel of his hand. My own eyes start to prick with tears.

"And I just wish you'd be honest. With yourself, with me. I _know _that you care about me. I know that you're..._affected _by me, Bella. I know we can be great together, if you'd just admit it to yourself."

My mind pictures it for a second. A little house on the Rez. Jake working as a mechanic, maybe. A kind of happiness. Not the kind I want.

"I don't understand, Bella. I don't know why you're talking about giving everything up. Giving your _LIFE _up. For him? After all this time? He _left _you. He's not coming back. I want you to have a future. I want you to _want _that future."

The tears are running freely down my face now, and my breath is hitching. I swipe at my cheeks with a gloved hand.

"Don't you get it, Jacob? This _isn't _about Edward anymore. You're right, he broke my heart. And you were there for me every day as I tried to piece it back together. And I will always be grateful for that." I clutch at his hand, willing him to hear me.

"This isn't about a choice between you and Edward. I don't think it's ever really been about that. It's a choice between who I thought I _should _be, and who I actually _am_. I've always felt ...out of step, Jake. Stumbling, literally, through life. I've never felt...normal. And it was only when I met the Cullens, when I met you and your pack. Jake, it was then that I realized that I'm _not _normal.

"Yes, I've had to face down an unimaginable amount of death and loss. Right now those seem almost inevitable, insurmountable. But being with the Cullens, I've never felt _stronger_, more _real,_more...myself.

"I've made a mess figuring all this out. I know that. And I've hurt you and I never, ever wanted that. But you want me to _want _a future, Jacob. And I do. I want a future with them. I want an eternity."

His warmth fills the space between us. I watch his chest rising and falling. I tug off my gloves, so that I can twine my fingers with his. He says nothing for the longest time. I wait, listening to the gathering storm, and thinking about our families out there in the fading night.

Finally he pulls me forward, into his arms, sleeping bag and all. I snuggle into his warmth. It feels like a form of forgiveness. The storm stretches, rumbling, across the night above us. "I'm not sure I'll ever be able to understand, Bella," he finally whispers, quietly into my ear. "But I love you too much not to try."

* * *

><p><strong>A jumbo update to thank you all for your patience and your kind and fantastic reviews. <strong>

**I couldn't have a better champion for this story than katinki. Please immediately head over to Season of Our Discontent, the angst contest she's running. The entries are amazing, and will make you heart bleed in the best ways.**

**Let me know if you're hanging in there with me. We're almost there!**


	19. Resist

I've always been the fastest.

I'm moving even before Jane can issue her first instruction, ignoring her irritated little voice as I start to sprint toward the direction of Forks as quickly as I can. Turns out, I'm not nearly fast enough. The flames of pain surge across my skin, melting my bones and I'm collapsing hard against the ground in cries of agony. Jane takes her time catching up to me before she releases me from her invisible talons.

"I don't know what you think you're playing at, Edward," she says, her voice petulant. "I am still in charge here. We will rendezvous with Aro, and take instructions from him."

_Do as she says, for God's sake. _Sarah stares at me with concern, not wanting to break rank to kneel at my side to see if I am okay. _Every minute you defy her is one we are not headed toward your family._

Sarah's right, of course. But sprawled on the ground propped up on weak elbows in the sharp gravel I feel pathetic, powerless. I look up at Demetri, who is looking at Jane in confusion, his mind desperately trying to process the rapid changes in this mission; trying to grasp the pieces of information he's missing. Demetri's an investigator; he prides himself on his methodical approach. He feels uncomfortable here, and he's deeply suspicious of Jane for the first time, which unnerves him further.

I struggle up to my feet, trying to school my features to neutral. I give Jane a small nod, hoping it looks as though I am prepared to do what she commands again, and I almost let out a sob of relief when she turns and heads in the same direction. If she'd run north again I would have been forced to rip her head off and take my chances, but both she and Demetri are thinking about the Olympic National Forest. This must have been what Gianna told them on the phone. I fill my lungs with unnecessary, slow breaths as we run. I have to be as calm as I can; I'm no help to Bella if I'm out of control.

I hear the noisy crowd of thoughts before I detect their scents. We run up through a craggy ravine, finding them waiting on a rocky plateau above the tree line, keeping watch on a stretch of forest below. More than twenty of them. Dark-cloaked and foreboding; wholly out of place in this lush, natural environment. Stunning, certainly, but entirely predatory. Sulpicia and Athenadora stand toward the back, pale and disinterested. Marcus is at Athenadora's side. He looks impossibly frail, staring up the night sky and paying no attention to what is going on around him.

Aro's smile broadens as he turns to greet us, leaning down to take Jane's hands in his and pressing a kiss to her cheek. "Welcome, friends. Isn't this an unexpected surprise?" He makes it sound as though we have bumped into each other at a cocktail party, and not at all as though the ruling class of the vampires have just taken the unprecedented step of leaving Italy for the first time in centuries.

Demetri takes a half-step forward, intending to explain himself. "Master, I …"

"Calm yourself, old friend," Aro says, raising a hand to wave him away. "Your work in this matter is beyond reproach. We are not here because we are displeased with you. Certain information has come to light since your departure that meant we needed to intercede ourselves."

Aro steps to the side, revealing a familiar face standing behind him. I stare in shock. _Irina_.

Aro is delighted by my reaction, like a carnival ringmaster unveiling his latest attraction. "It seems that, in _addition _to a continuing association with the human who knows of our kind, Carlisle and his coven have formed an unholy alliance with our natural enemies. Shapeshifting wolves. Enemies who have taken the life of dear Irina's mate."

My mouth falls open. The thought of the Quileutes transforming into wolves again, after so long, is troubling. And what would Laurent have been doing anywhere near them? Irina's eyes are dull, and her thoughts a mix of agony and uncertainty. Images of Laurent, happy and laughing. Her sisters consoling her at the news of his death. She seems to be trying to remember her pain in order to steel herself, because being here, among _these _vampires, is terrifying and not at all what she had imagined.

"So, you see, in addition to the army of newborns who swim across the Sound, we seem to have a broader problem to deal with. A much more _serious _transgression."

"This is some sort of misunderstanding," I spit, unable to contain myself any further, my fists clenching and unclenching at my side. "The treaty with the wolves is about territory. We...they...respect the Quileute reservation for hunting. Nothing more."

Caius raises a disbelieving eyebrow at me. "A _treaty_? So you admit this? That these abominations know who and what Carlisle's coven are? That they...have reached _agreement_?" His voice drips with disgust and accusation.

My mind is racing. I can't think what to say that won't condemn the family further. The rocky ground beneath me feels like it's shifting, like I might lose my balance at any second. This is insane. Aro has never raised the issue of the wolves before now, and he will have known all about them. He will have seen Ephraim and the others in my memories. I think about confronting him with this information, but it seems too dangerous. I can't work out what game he's playing.

I try to minimize the damage.

"It was a boundary dispute, generations ago," my tone is dismissive. "Nothing more."

"It seems like _quite a lot_ more," Caius retorts. "You moved back to this region, knowing that the native people would identify you. And now it seems that the coven is not only _allied _with these killer animals, but _sides _with them even after the murder of Irina's mate."

I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts. The clamor of disapproval from all of those around me is deafening.

"Let us speak to Carlisle, then," I suggest, trying to keep the note of desperation out of my voice. I know for a fact that the Volturi are uninterested in explanations. The chances of them waiting to hear Carlisle's side of this story are slim.

"There!" Renata calls from an outcrop below us, where she has been keeping watch. Several miles away, but the noise is unmistakable. The newborns are moving at speed and without stealth, crashing through the undergrowth.

"Very well," Aro nods, turning to the assembled group before him. "Let us go this way."

I stare in disbelief as he indicates a mountainous track that will take us parallel to the racing hoard below us.

"We need to cut them off!" I yell, stalking toward him. Jane is at his side in a heartbeat, daring me to take another step, to give her a reason to hurt me again.

"Edward, Edward," Aro tuts at me, like a child. "The Cullens are more than capable of dealing with a handful of newborn vampires. Particularly in tandem with their new _friends_."

"What are you _talking _about? It is _our _role to enforce the law! We came all this way to make sure those newborns were destroyed!"

"And they will be. And when the Cullens demonstrate their _commitment_ by doing so, we can then discuss their slightly _fluid_approach to the law with them."

I swivel around wildly, looking at Caius, Marcus and the others. No one makes a move.

"You would put their lives at risk, for the sake of proving a _point_? Those newborns are vicious, out of control, and probably out number them!"

Aro straightens his robe and turns away from me, moving silently into the night. The others move into formation behind him, studiously ignoring me. I look desperately for Sarah, pleading with her with my eyes to do _something_, _anything_.

She shrugs imperceptibly, stalking along the path ahead of me after Felix. _Don't be insane, Edward. We don't know what's going on here, and there are too many of them to risk it. If any single one of them is immune to me in some way and we're dead. _

I want to wring her neck. I want to run. I need to get to my family. I need to get to Bella. I need to tear down this hillside like a maniac and rip those newborns limb from limb.

Sarah pauses, as if sensing my growing panic.

_LISTEN TO ME, EDWARD. You cannot help your family if you're dead. We go along with this as long as we can. As long as we can: to keep us safe, and keep your family alive. I promise you, I SWEAR, I will do what I can. If it looks like this is turning against them I will tell Aro something. I have no idea what, but I will. But we cannot tip our hand. Not up here in the dark with no idea what's going. I won't risk it. They'll destroy us._

I keep putting one foot in front of the other, still out of my mind with worry, trying to piece together a way to make this work. Every muscle is tensed and ready to spring. I listen for the newborns running below us, single-minded in their purpose. Intent on destroying my love. And as much as it sickens me, Sarah seems to be right. If I break from the Volturi now, even assuming Jane and Alec let me go, the newborns will tear me apart. If I run for my family, I've nailed my colors to the mast and there will be nothing for it but to fight the oldest vampires in existence to the death. Probably mine.

I run my hands through the undergrowth as we run, feeling the frost on the leaves, damp and cold. I try to find any kind of center within myself. I think of Bella, lying in the meadow surrounded by wildflowers. Of feeling safe with her in the warm glow of the sun; of feeling for the first time like I could unfurl.

My breathing comes back under control, and the tension in my limbs becomes purposeful. I'm going to find a way to save her. There is no other option.

I drop lightly down a series of boulders to join the mass of vampires below me where they have fanned out along a crevice, the ancient forest canopy below us opening out into a broad clearing. To the east, the newborns continue their advance. To the west, my family steps out from the trees in a straight line, shoulder to shoulder, oblivious to the crowd of spectators far above them. Carlisle stands in the middle, with Esme at his side. Aro steeples his fingers against his chin, staring down at them with a considered expression, his mind schooled and empty. I realize that Carmen, Eleazar and Garrett are with them. As Jasper steps from the shadows, Peter and Charlotte are at his side. My heart clenches tightly. My place is down there. I feel like the worst kind of traitor in standing my ground.

And then, Caius lets out a low exclamation of wonder. "Would you look at that?"

The dark shapes break from the forest on either side of Emmett and Jasper, who are at each end of the line. The wolves fan out to flank the vampires, their powerful forms and flashing eyes intimidating even at this distance. Ten of them; more than even I had expected.

I stare down at their formation, straining to the very edges of my supernatural vision to make out each of them in the dark. Their determined faces; poised for battle. There is only one thought in my mind. _Bella_. Where is Bella? They will have tried to keep her safe. No one will have risked having her in the clearing. But where, and who is protecting her? I try to imagine what Jasper would have done. It would be too dangerous to leave her with Charlie. Is she on the reservation? Are there other wolves with her? Or is she nearby, where Esme or Alice could get to her quickly. I resist the urge to start looking, taking deep lungfuls of air to see if I can detect her unmistakable scent. There is nothing nearby.

Aro nods finally, announcing for the benefit of his retinue, "It is as we had feared. You see before you a coven almost as large as our own. And you see for yourselves the treacherous alliance they have forged."

I'm about to protest when a long howl erupts from one of the wolves. The newborns scatter down through the trees and run full tilt into the clearing, coming to an abrupt and startled halt.


	20. Fight

**Yes, it's a double update weekend.  
><strong>

* * *

><p>The newborns falter for half a second, as shocked as the Volturi by the appearance of the wolves. Then I see something that makes me furious. Standing at the back of their group, barking orders, is Riley. A growl builds in my chest. This is Jane's fault. That he's still alive; that he's here, goading these wild <em>children <em>into battle.

They don't need much encouragement. Deciding, to their folly, that the wolves are not a threat, the group explodes across the clearing in a frenzied, snarling mass. My family is more than ready to meet them.

Emmett takes the first one like a wrecking ball, clattering into the trees and ripping the newborn's head clean off his shoulders. And then the whole clearing is a blur of motion. The noise, screaming and snarling, and the crunch of bone. The howl of the wolves. So much movement and mayhem and so hard to see who is winning. Bonfires catch and take hold on either side of the field, and I can only assume someone built them in advance. Pieces of the defeated are tossed into the flames and soon our line of sight is obscured with thick, acrid smoke.

"Come," Aro announces with frustration. "We move closer."

I let out a breath in relief. Closer and I feel sure I will be able to hear what's going on. Closer, and I might be able to make a decision so that Alice can see what happens next.

The Volturi sweep down the hill in silence, toward the confrontation. Aro is determined, his thoughts reflecting nothing but what he sees in front of him, as if he's holding up a mirror to me in his mind. Caius is, as ever, slightly irritated by proceedings. Wishing this was over. Annoyed that he has to dirty his hands. Marcus is drifting along with the wives. His thoughts are troubled. It's a long time since he's been in a forest, and the noise of the battle and the smell of the burning corpses is unsettling him, bringing back terrible memories.

Finally, through the haze of Volturi thoughts, I start to hear others. Fear and panic mostly. A foreign, plural voice that must be the wolves. And my _family_. Carlisle's concern for Esme as she knocks a lithe young man to his knees and tears off one of his arms. Alice's satisfaction as yet another torso is tossed onto a fire. Emmett's pain, from a glancing blow to the ribs. I'm counting them off, rapidly, in my head. Rose kicks out at the dismembered head of a young girl. Jasper runs, flipping neatly over a wolf, blindsiding a distracted vampire. All of them are _alive_. I nearly sob with gratitude. Our friends are alive. It is the newborns who lie strewn across the battlefield, dead and dying.

_Bella_. My mind ranges across the surrounding landscape, looking for her protectors even if I could never hear her. But there is nothing.

We're close enough now that I can hear them out loud, the sound of their voices alone like a homecoming after so long apart.

"Jasper!" Carlisle's tone is warning, and in my mind's eye I see Jasper crouching, poised to attack the last newborn. A slip of a girl, wide-eyed, petrified. Kneeling at Esme's feet.  
>"She doesn't want to fight. She's surrendered."<p>

"Carlisle, I…" Jasper's hesitant. I want to scream out. I want to warn them that we're here. Why hasn't Alice seen us yet? I listen for her, but her thoughts are distracted. She's surrounded by wolves and it's almost like a headache for her, like what humans experience as a migraine.

Jasper continues, "I'm sorry, but that's not possible. We can't have any of these newborns  
>associated with us when the Volturi come. Do you realize the danger that would put us in?"<p>

I suck in a breath. They _do _know we're coming.

"Jasper, she's only a child," Esme protests. "We can't just murder her in cold blood!"

"It's our family on the line here, Esme. We can't afford to have them think we broke this rule."

Suddenly I hear Alice's voice, clear as a bell. "They're here. The north end of the clearing. Now."

And she's right, of course, as we step through the thinning trees, spreading like a dark fog through the tendrils of smoke, our robes sweeping over the detritus of war.

"Welcome, Aro," Carlisle manages, straightening himself up and trying to put a friendly face on his greeting. His thoughts are worried. Concerned that we have arrived now, when they are weakened and on the back foot. He's trying not to make eye-contact with me, but his thoughts are full of concern and love and worry. It makes my heart ache, the depth of his commitment to me. My _father_.

I look along the line as they form up. Clothing torn and hair out of place. Mud-streaked but victorious. I want to run to them; to pull Alice into a tight hug. To feel Emmett pound me on the back in greeting. None of them will look at me, even as their minds reach out. And even as these feelings threaten to overwhelm me, I feel a thick dampening influence from Chelsea. A disinterest that creeps through my subconscious, leaving me standing where I am, shoulder to shoulder with the Guard.

The wolves are even more striking than I remember. Huge, panting creatures, standing like sentries. I hear discomfort in the minds of the Guard around me, staggered by their size and power.

"It seems we missed all of the fun!" Aro waves around at the destruction, his voice light. "But I see that you perhaps saved someone for us?"

"She has surrendered," Esme explains, one hand on the frightened girl's shoulder.

"Surrendered?" Jane snaps in disbelief and annoyance.

"Carlisle gave her the option," Esme replies, seemingly unfazed by Jane's tone. Her face gives nothing away, but like Carlisle, her thoughts are only for me. _She's safe, Edward. We have her protected. She's not here, but she's not far. _

Bella. My Bella. I struggle against Chelsea's influence. Alice, too, is trying to comfort me in her mind. _Bella is with a wolf. He's young, and strong, and can take care of her. The wolves here can communicate with him. It's going to be okay, Edward._

I wish I could believe her.

"There are no options for those who break the rules," Jane says, her tone dead and cold.

Carlisle answers Jane in a soft voice. "That's in your hands. As long as she was willing to halt her attack on us, I saw no need to destroy her. She was never taught the rules."

"That is irrelevant," snorts Caius.

"As you wish." Carlisle spreads his hand as if to turn the matter over to us. I see pain flash across Esme's features, a mother to the core.

"It appears that you've done our work for us today… for the most part," Aro muses. "Just out of professional curiosity, how many were there? They left quite a wake of destruction in Seattle."

"Eighteen, including this one." The vampires around me murmur. There is disquiet that the newborn pack could have grown so large. Either Victoria and Riley were acting very quickly, or this has been going on longer than we had been told.

"Eighteen?" Jane repeats, a note of surprise in her voice. I can't tell if it's real or if she's faking it.

"All brand-new," Carlisle says. "They were unskilled."

"All?" Aro enquires. "Then who was their creator?"

I think about Riley, at the edges of the battle, yelling at the newborns. I look around for any evidence of his corpse.

"Her name is Victoria," Esme is explaining. "She wasn't with them."

"She's dead," Jane announces dispassionately. "Edward killed her." A mental fist-bump from Emmett. Disappointment from the wolves. Concern from Esme.

"You there," Jane snarls at the vampire on the ground. "Your name." The gesture is almost undetectable, but the girl's spine arches in pain.

"Bree," she yelps, as fast as she can, gasping though the agony.

"She'll tell you anything you want to know," Esme growls. "You don't have to do that."

"Oh, I know," Jane sounds almost cheerful. "Bree? Who brought you here?"

"Riley told us that we had to destroy the yellow-eyes. He said it would be easy. He said that the city was theirs, and they were coming to get us. He said once they were gone, all the blood  
>would be ours. He gave us a scent. He said we would know that we had the right coven, because she would be with them. He said whoever got to her first could have her."<p>

Rage floods over me, bursting through the net that Chelsea has cast over my devotion, and I can't contain the growl that rumbles in my chest. How _dare_ he? Offer up Bella as _bait_?

Aro swings briefly to look at me, his carefully-constructed thoughts slipping for just a heartbeat. I sense a wave of angry surprise, that Bella still produces such strength of reaction in me, despite his best efforts. And something else. A woman. A surge of uncontrolled emotion. And before I can process what I'm hearing, it's gone. His facade is firmly back in place.

He turns back to Bree. "It looks like Riley was wrong about the easy part," he says, a hint of teasing in his tone.

"Riley left us, and he didn't come to help like he promised. And then it was so confusing, and everybody was in pieces." She flinches at the memory of the fight, shuddering and not looking around at the carnage.

"I was afraid. I wanted to run away." She nods at Carlisle. "That one said they wouldn't hurt me if I stopped fighting."

"Ah, but that wasn't his gift to offer, young one," Aro says. He sounds like he is enjoying himself. "Broken rules demand a consequence."

This comment is as much for the benefit of everyone else in the clearing as it is for Bree. I stare hard at Alice, willing her to look at me. Willing her to understand why we are here and what is about to happen, but there is nothing. The hum of her headache, the occasional burst of clarity, and a deep-seated frustration with her powerlessness.

"Are you sure you got all of them?" Demetri asks, kicking out at a loose limb near his feet. I'm thinking the same thing. Bree thinks Riley left them. Where did he go? I want Aro to order Demetri to track the edges of the clearing; to make sure.

Carlisle, however, nods. "We split up, too."

"I can't deny that I'm impressed," Aro says, sounding sincere. He was clearly hopeful that Riley's army would do some damage here, and they failed. Spectacularly.

"I've never seen a coven escape this magnitude of offensive intact," Caius asks. "Do you know what was behind it? It seems like extreme behavior, considering the way you live here."

It feels like he's laying a trap. Wanting them to talk about Victoria's motivations, about James' death. About _Bella_.

"Victoria held a grudge against us," Carlisle responds carefully, without elaboration.

"As I understand it, there's a little more to it than that," Aro drawls slowly, stepping to one side and allowing Felix to thrust Irina forward roughly to the front of the group. Alice gasps in shock. Carlisle looks deeply pained. Irina, for her part, is clearly regretting playing any part in this. Even the memories of her loss are not enough to sustain her now that she faces old friends.

"These _animals_ that surround you destroyed Irina's devoted mate."

The wolves snap and growl, clearly understanding the insult, but they do not break the line. Carlisle lets out a shuddering breath. "They were protecting a human. That is their nature and their commitment to this land."

Aro nods, as if he is considering this, before springing his trap. "But, dear Carlisle, as I understand it, this _grudge_ you speak of came about because _you _destroyed Victoria's mate. And that you _also _did to protect a _human_."

_Bella_. Aro's mind is suddenly flooded with images of her, bereft and sobbing on the floor of the Grand Hall. Screaming my name. My knees buckle, and I struggle to keep my footing. Aro's expression is outwardly calm, but inside his emotions are boiling up, a seething rage that seems to be melting through the veil he has drawn over his thoughts to hide them from me.

"And so, it seems to me that your Coven has not only revealed itself to this human child, a transgression that Edward had to atone for in Volterra, but that you continue to shelter her, and you do so at the expense of the lives of _two _of our kind. That you have forged an alliance with our natural enemies, seemingly for the sole purpose of protecting a _human life_ over a vampire one. Can this be true?"

The images of Bella in his mind are devastating; the pain wrought across her delicate features entirely my doing. I close my eyes briefly. It is all I can do not to throw myself forward into the center of the clearing and put the blame for all of this where it belongs, squarely on my shoulders. If only I could be convinced that the punishment Aro would exact would only be leveled at me.

Aro's mental picture of Bella starts to shimmer, shift. Her hair seems a little darker, the twisted agony across her brow the same. The pain. The rage. Something's wrong; something is off. I struggle to focus on what Aro is thinking, but it's hard with so many people around me. It looks like Bella, but it isn't. Aro's hands are around her neck. Anger. Heart-wrenching pain. _No reason to leave._

"It is true that both James and Laurent died because they attacked Bella," Carlisle concedes quietly. "She is still human. And for that reason, on these lands, she demands the wolves' protection." A large russet-colored wolf lets out a low howl, pawing at the ground in agreement. The thoughts of the wolves are hard to distinguish, but it seems this must be Jacob.

"But Aro, she is also, without question, Edward's _mate_. We protect her accordingly."

The words are like an incantation. Somewhere behind me I hear Marcus thinking. _No reason to leave. No reason for anyone to leave._I've heard this before. The clamor of the minds around me is becoming frustrating. I need silence. I need to focus.

Aro laughs; a soulless, ugly sound. "Come, come, Carlisle. You know better than that. We have so little in the way of laws, our kind. And yet you flout them all."

"Do not treat us as fools, Carlisle." Caius says, drifting to Aro's side. "You know as well as we do that without the law, we are no better than the animals at your side."

Aro nods. "I see no reason to delay..." He turns slightly toward us, and I realize that this will be it. He will pass sentence; order the others forward. I try to zoom in on just Marcus' mind, searching for an answer that is eluding me. Something just out of my reach.

In his thoughts, he's sitting on the ground; outside, but not here. The season is different; it's daylight. _No reason to leave. No reason for anyone to leave._ Aro is with him. A hand on his shoulder; and at the fringes of the vision, I see Chelsea. Suddenly the image comes into stark relief. Marcus' pale hand pressed to the cheek of a woman in pain. The woman from _Aro's_ memories who looks like Bella, but isn't. The savage, fatal injury across her neck. The incomprehensible heartbreak. _Didyme_.

The two halves of the puzzle fly together in my mind with a snap.

"This has nothing to do with the law."

My voice is louder than I intend it, harsh in the still of the forest. Unexpected. Aro's bloodied eyes narrow in fury. The Guard's thoughts are in unison, stunned at my outburst.

"You're not here to enforce the law. You're here to take what you want. You want my commitment, my undivided loyalty. You want me to have _no reason to leave_."

I hear Marcus murmur the words behind me, and I whirl on my heel. I'm in front of him in an instant, his translucent hands in mind, willing his mind to focus. Willing him to really _hear_me through the fog of history and Chelsea's tentacle reach. "That's right," I urge him. "It's what he's told you. It's what Chelsea's convinced you of for centuries. That there is no reason for anyone to leave."

Out of the corner of one eye, I see Aro gesture in Alec's direction.

I clutch at Marcus' hands. "It's all a lie, don't you see. All of this is artifice. Aro killed her, Marcus. _Aro killed Didyme_."

The thoughts of everyone in the field recoil in shock and disbelief. Everyone except Aro, who has turned into a pillar of rage.

"_ALEC_", he hisses, disgusted that the boy has not yet acted. Alec shakes his head briefly, staring at me, and flicks an impatient hand. I wait for the fog to descend, for this to be over, but with a shrill cry it is Chelsea who collapses noisily to the ground.

"What is the _MEANING_ of this?" Aro shrieks, rounding on Alec, and finding Jane standing between them, one tiny palm in the air to stop him.

"Is it true?" she asks, her voice suddenly sounding tiny, like the child she is embodied within.

Around me, the Guard is restless. Their thoughts, suddenly freed from Chelsea's grasp, are wide-ranging. Suspicion, fear, and paranoia uncurl and roll out around me. It seems to magnify and fold in upon itself, and I can't help but wonder if that's Jasper, conducting this like an orchestra.

Before Aro can respond I turn back to Marcus, his ruby eyes boring in to mine, hoping desperately for an answer that is less hurtful than the one I have for him.

"You were planning to leave," I remind him, dragging forth the memories long-buried from his mind. "There was a battle, I don't know where. In a forest, not so different from this one. It was to be your last." My voice is urgent, willing him to understand. "You and Didyme were separated. She was with Aro, and she was mortally wounded. He said it was a nomad, that he avenged her. But he lied. _He lied_. He killed her, Marcus. He killed his sister, so that you would have no reason to leave."

A clear voice cuts through the night. Assured, commanding. "Edward speaks the truth," Sarah says. "This has never been about the law. This has only ever been about your loyalty."

Aro hisses behind me and I think that he is about to attack. A noise tears forth from Marcus, a howl borne of centuries of heartbreak and betrayal. A cry for a lost love; for the other half of his soul. And even as Renata processes what is about to happen and begins to move, his ancient power has flung her across the clearing. Marcus moves faster than even my eyes can detect, lunging at Aro, his teeth bared and fists flying. The sound is horrific, from the far side of hell. Like thunderbolts colliding. Like the earth collapsing in on itself.

And then silence. Nothing but the sound of the wolves' heartbeats. Even the minds of those around me startled into absolute stillness.

Marcus lies sprawled on the ground, like a broken doll. His limbs at odd angles, grievous wounds across his chest and his neck that he will not recover from. His face is beatific, his eyes closed. Just the hint of a smile. Despite his injuries he looks at peace.

And in one hand, he clutches the severed head of Aro Volturi.

Caius is the only one who moves, flying to kneel by his brothers' sides. His expression is horrified and dismayed. Marcus' eyes flutter open, one pale hand reaching for Caius. His voice is barely audible. "Remember what is important, Caius," he whispers. "Do a better job of it than we did."

Caius lets out an anguished cry, tugging at his hair and tearing at his robes in grief.

Then, a noise that causes my stone heart to crack. In unison and urgency, the wolves begin to howl.

_Bella_.


	21. Bleed

It seems like my eyes have only closed for a minute, but I'm suddenly jerked awake by Jake's movement as he wriggles upright in the confined tent.

He looks down at my sleepy form with a smile. His expression is wistful, almost nostalgic. I feel like he's trying to work out how to say goodbye, and it makes me unaccountably sad. I abruptly realize that this could be the last time I see him. He is going back to Sam and the pack, back to fight a horde of bloodthirsty newborn vampires.

"Jake, wait..." I reach for him, my hand sliding down his arm.

"Don't worry about me, Bells. I'll be fine." He forces a small laugh. "Besides, you think I'm going to let Seth go in my place? Have all the fun and steal all the glory? Right." He snorts.

He unzips the tent, letting the frigid air and bright moonlight bounce in off the snow. I climb out after him. The night still has a bite to it, but the air around us is now calm after the storm. Seth Clearwater is curled up on a patch of pine needles in the shadow of a thick spruce, his head on his paws. His breath curls in little bouts of steam from his nostrils.

"Is it the others? In the clearing?"

Jake nods. "It's time. Your fortune-teller sees the newborns have the trail." Seth whines softly, and gets to his feet, pacing back and forth. I know how disappointed he is to be stuck here looking after me.

Jake takes my hands. I hate this so much. I can feel tears start to well up again. There are so many things I want to tell him. I want to beg him to stay here with me. I want him to take me far away from all of this.

"Bella, you said last night that you were sorry you'd hurt me. I just want to say that I've behaved pretty badly myself. I've made this much harder for you than I needed to. I could have given up with good grace in the beginning, but I didn't know how. I know, at times, that hurt you, too."

I shake my head quickly, about to protest, but he shushes me. His warm hands run up and down my arms, rustling the bright fabric of Alice's snow jacket.

"I wanted things to be different between us, but I was fighting nature and fate. If the legends are true, one day I'm going to meet my imprint, Bella. And then what? What of the life I'd made with you? It would be so unfair to tie you to me, knowing that I could wind up breaking your heart. Just like Sam broke Leah's."

He tucks my hair back where it has escaped from under my knitted woolen hat, pressing his palm against my cheek. "I love you, Bella," he murmurs.

"I love you, Jacob," I whisper brokenly. Seth whines quietly behind me.

"I have to leave," he whispers.

"No."

He smiles. "I won't be long," he promises. He bends to kiss me. His hands are soft on my face and his warm lips gentle, unexpectedly hesitant. It is brief, and very, very sweet. His arms curl around me, and he hugs me securely. Against his chest, where he can't see, the tears well up and spill over.

He releases me gently, and with one last look, he turns and runs full tilt for the clearing, already shimmering as he prepares to shift to his other self.

In his absence the cold night air starts to seep into my bones. I shuffle back to the tent and snuggle back into the sleeping bag. I leave the door to the tent open so that I can see Seth, who paces back and forth outside. Listening to his brothers; aching to be there alongside them. The silence is oppressive. I hate not knowing what's going on.

It seems to be taking an eternity. I am on the verge of asking Seth to phase back so that he can tell me what is happening when he suddenly howls outside the tent.

My body stiffens at the sound. I think of my family. Alice is so small. And Esme...God, if _anything _happens to them, I will be unable to go on.

Seth starts to whimper. I can hear his heavy panting just outside the tent wall, and I try to keep my breathing on the same even pace, so that I won't hyperventilate. In, out. _In, out._

The sudden absence of sound is the only warning. The deep rush of Seth's breathing cut off in surprise. Oh, no. No. No. "Who has been hurt? Theirs or ours? Seth!" I shout helplessly, scrambling to get out of the sleeping bag; to get outside. So quickly that I'm not exactly sure how it happens, but I'm on my feet and the tent is collapsing in ragged shreds around me.

I blink, shocked. Seth is right beside me, his face only inches from mine. Then the huge wolf wheels to face the rocky track that we climbed to get here only hours ago.

Seconds pass. It feels like days. My blood thunders in my veins. I am terrified to the point of nausea by the knowledge that something horrible has gone awry in the clearing. I open my mouth to demand that Seth phases straight away to tell me what has happened. That he takes me _there_, _now_. But before I can get the first syllable out, Seth launches through the air.

I skitter backwards, and find myself with my back pressed against the sheer cliff face. Relief washes over me at the same time that my stomach drops. I _misunderstood_. Nothing has gone wrong in the clearing. _The crisis is here_.

Seth crouches in a defensive posture, growling and snapping at the as-yet unseen enemy approaching. I try to convince myself that we're going to be okay. Seth is a good fighter; I've seen him in training. He's young, and strong, and fast. He's eager. He listened to every word Jasper and Peter had to say. Seth's body shifts a fraction. I stare at the black shadows of the forest.

A lone vampire edges out into the small opening of our camp, scarlet eyes intent, missing nothing. He seems to be only a boy, though he's muscular and tall; maybe my age when he was changed. His gaze is hesitant, flicking between Seth and me. Trying to gauge the threat that the huge wolf poses. I press further back against the cliff for balance, feeling the cold, rough granite through my gloves.

My heart beats furiously, loudly. The camp is quiet; the only sound my ragged breathing and Seth's low, warning growls. None of us moves.

An immense distance away, from far across the forest, wolves' howls echo in the still air. Are they fighting? _Are they hurt?_Or are they seeing through Seth's eyes? Are they on their way?

The blond boy stares at me, ignoring Seth altogether.

"You don't seem like much," he says, finally. His voice has that same musical quality of all the vampires I've met. But he seems resentful. Angry and hurt at the same time. "I'm not sure why your friends were willing to lay down their lives for you; dying now there in the forest."

I bite hard at my lip. He's lying. _He must be lying_.

He takes another step toward me. His eyes are so red. Brighter than any I've seen. He must be so young, and yet he's restraining himself. Not like the slathering blood-crazed newborns that Jasper described. Seth crouches, ready to spring.

"My beloved, she waits for me. She knows your secrets. And she wants you dead." The vampire's voice is trance-like, as if he's on autopilot. "She's waiting for me, in our house. In our house in the woods. She wants you dead. She's waiting for me, and when I come back and tell her I've succeeded, she'll love me even more."

"Victoria?" I sputter, in horrified recognition. Is he telling the truth? Is it possible that she didn't even accompany her army into battle? The boy's face softens at the mention of her name.

"She doesn't love you," I insist, disgusted. "She loved a man named _James_. She's after nothing but revenge and you're no more than a _pawn _to her." The words fly from my lips with a confidence I do not feel. They strike the boy like glancing blows. He hisses at me, and Seth snarls in response. I realize that Seth is inching sideways, trying to take advantage of the boy's distraction to put himself in the perfect position to strike.

"You don't have to die," I promise, abruptly changing tack and trying to hold the boy's attention for longer. Trying to give Seth some kind of chance. "There are other ways to live than the way she's shown you. It's not all betrayal and blood. You can walk away right now. You don't have to die for her lies."

His face clouds for a second. Not long enough. His jaw tightens, and he squares his shoulders. He tenses himself to attack. Before he can move, a mammoth sandy shape flies through the center of the opening, throwing the vampire bodily to the ground. The vampire snaps and screams, pummeling at Seth. He flings a vicious kick into Seth's shoulder. I wince as I hear the bone crunch.

Seth backs off and starts to circle, limping. A guttural cry rings out, and I realize that it's me. I'm screaming myself hoarse, unable to move - petrified with fear. The vampire is back on his feet, arms out and ready, crouching low to come at Seth again. His fist catches Seth's flank, and a low yelp coughs out of Seth's throat. His shoulders twitch, trying to shake off the pain.

"_Please_," I plead uselessly. "He's just a _child_!" But we are all just children: Seth, and me, and this hopeless young vampire who is determined to kill us.

The boy closes the distance between them in a flash, wrapping his arms around Seth's enormous, furry form and squeezing. I hear terrible noises; a howl of unimaginable pain. And suddenly Seth is flying across the snow, hitting the cliff face beside me with a sickening thud and collapsing to the ground. He doesn't move or make a sound.

The vampire is missing part of one hand, and his shoulder is at an odd angle. He looks like a creature from a horror movie, pacing towards me like something out of a nightmare.

"She loves me," he murmurs, voice soft as he moves another inch closer. His eyes are brilliant red, crazed with devotion for Victoria and single-minded in purpose. "She loves me, and she wants you dead."

Adrenaline jolts through my veins. I push off the granite and try to run, thinking desperately that if I can slip past him in his weakened state, maybe I can make it to the cliff track. My boot slides on the icy rock and I feel myself falling.

I never hit the ground.

The vampire's hands around my upper arms are like vises, snatching me out of the air. I expect pain, but as his teeth break the skin of my neck I hear it more than feel it. A wet, tearing sound. My nostrils fill with the sickly, metallic smell of blood. I close my eyes.

_Charlie has his feet up in the recliner and I can smell gun-oil on his hands as he snaps open a can of beer. _

My pulse thunders in my ears. Throbs; fast at first but starting to slow.

_Renee is arranging flowers in a vase beside my hospital bed in Phoenix, murmuring nonsense about soap operas. Jacob is trying not to laugh as he extends a hand to me to haul me out of the mud, where I've slid off my motorcycle again. _

The black behind my eyelids softens to red. It's hard to take in a breath.

_Alice is curling a ringlet of my hair, smiling at my scowl in the mirror. Edward is pushing open the door of the cafeteria... _

_Edward is smiling shyly at me over a microscope...Edward is buckling the side of Tyler's van..._

My lungs feel empty. My chest aches.

_Edward is shining in a meadow...is hurtling up a tree...is opening the car door for me..._

_He's lifting me onto his feet in a gazebo..._

_...his lips are pressing to mine..._

_Edward is catching a baseball..._

_...is tucking my quilt around me..._

_...is reading to me..._

_...playing my lullaby..._

_…is..._

_…_

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks to xtothey for the lovely campfire over at ADF. A writer is only ever as good as the person who pimps her to her friends. xxx<strong>_  
><em>


	22. Change

The wolves' howls split the night air. Their thoughts are chaotic, talking to one another in a single pack voice. It's hard for me to follow; difficult to unravel. Mental pictures of the forest and the fight. Hopelessly disjointed.

Caius is bereft; slumped in the dirty snow beside Marcus, his mind unable to grasp what has happened and why his brother has not survived his wounds.

"He didn't feed..." I venture quietly, unwilling to intrude on his grief, and increasingly distracted by the wolves, who have started to pace and circle and whine at each other, clearly agitated about something.

Caius looks up at me, anguish writ large across his features, searching for answers.

I think carefully about what to reveal. "For the longest time. He was starving himself. I think...I don't know." It seems inappropriate to guess or assume. "His thoughts...he seemed to feel he had nothing left to live for." All I can think about is my own state of mind as I approached Volterra. Overwhelmed by Bella's loss; not wanting to go on. "I think he wanted to be free."

The wolves' thoughts are intruding on my own, building in volume in my mind. Scattered, disagreeing. They are arguing with one another. One of them wants to phase in order to speak to us.

"I can hear you as you are," I snap, finally, turning from Caius to face them. "What is it?"

The Jacob-wolf steps forward. _Seth is guarding Bella. He thinks another vampire approaches. He thinks we missed one. _

Panic seizes me. Why is no one moving? Why is everyone just _standing _here? It takes me a beat too long to realize I am the only vampire who hears him.

_He's young and inexperienced, Edward. We can't be sure. And if we leave, your family is outnumbered. We don't know the nature of this threat._

I curse under my breath. Behind me, Caius gets slowly to his feet. "Edward, what is happening?"

This is it: now or never. I can turn and run with the wolves at my back, or I can hope he understands or forgives.

"There is a young wolf nearby, guarding Bella. He believes another vampire is out there. That one escaped the fight."

Caius looks curiously at the animals in front of us, marveling at their ability to communicate. Then he turns abruptly to Demetri. "Go. Find the newborn and finish this. Bring the human girl to me."

My heart sinks. "Caius, I …"

"GO," he flicks a hand at me, impatient. Signaling that he neither cares whether I stay or follow. "But the girl is brought back here, Edward. You know better than to cross me this day."

I'm running before he can finish the thought, following Demetri out of the clearing in a flash. The wolves bound after us, breaking off in a different direction. They know where Seth and Bella are, and I'm torn. _Follow the newborn's trail. _Jacob insists. _Seth might be wrong._

I realize I don't care if Seth's wrong, and I certainly don't care about killing Riley. I need to get to Bella. I abandon Demetri and take off after the wolves. They're fast. Not quite at my speed, but impressive. We follow the mountain trail easily, and when I can see in their minds where we are headed, I overtake them sprinting as fast as I can. The dawn light is starting to break over the horizon, leaking between the trees and illuminating silhouettes and shadows.

I strain to hear: sounds, thoughts; I don't care which. I take great lungfuls of air as I run, hoping for her scent on the wind.

It happens all at once.

I see what Seth's experiencing through the minds of the wolves. Riley: blood-red eyes; talking; advancing. _I run faster_. Suddenly, like changing a channel, it's not secondhand anymore. I can hear Seth's thoughts directly as he launches at the vampire with all his might. I can _feel_ his pain and his adrenaline. _I run faster_. And then I can hear her. Screaming. Screaming her lungs out the way she was the last time I was near her. Screaming with all she has left. _I run faster._

Seth's mind goes black.

Bella's scream cuts off abruptly.

I burst from the tree line.

Too late.

_I'm too late._

She hangs like a rag doll from his arms, her blood spilling from his mouth, vibrant and unnatural against the snow. The scent of it floods every one of my senses, ignites every nerve-ending, has me flying through the air and ripping his arms clean off his body so that has no choice but to _let her go_. _Let her go_! She slumps to the ground, the blood around her like a halo, her skin unspeakably pale, and her lips mauve. Her eyes are closed, and I listen for her heartbeat, for _my hope_. Riley's coming at me, bewildered and enraged, and I'm still clutching his useless, evil limbs, and so I hurl them at him, lunging straight after. _Tearing _and _biting _and _ripping_. The rage flooding out of me so strong, like a tidal wave, borne of such hatred that the word vengeance no longer even applies. I can't hear her. _I can't hear her. _And his useless mind is full of thoughts of Victoria, and I need it to stop, _I need him to stop_, and with a metallic screech I wrench his head from his shoulders and throw it out of the clearing, just as the wolves come bounding up the trail.

The forest is still.

Two of them drag Riley's torso away from me, and I crouch at Bella's side, breathing heavily, pulling her into my lap and cradling her bloodied head. Whispering her name; pressing my fingers uselessly against her wounds.

In an instant, Jacob is across from me, phased back to human and kneeling in the snow. Tears course down his face, as he stares at Bella's broken form in horror.

_Do something! _ His thoughts scream at me, his throat too choked to speak. _SAVE HER!_

I'm tearing at her snow jacket, slicing through the layers of down and pressing my hand against her chest. It's there: so faint, _so very weak_. But it's there, thudding gently, too quietly, _too slowly_ against my palm.

"There's no saving her now," I whisper, my voice sounding hoarse and defeated. A wolf behind me lets out an ear-splitting howl. Jacob blinks through his tears. I take one of his hands and place it on Bella's chest, above her fading heart. "She's dying Jacob, either way. So you have to tell me what to do."

His dark eyes are staring at me, his face agonized. "No. _NO_! You did this once before. You saved her. In Phoenix. Do it again. _Do it again!_"

I need him to understand.

"She's lost too much blood, Jacob, and we're too far from help. She's full of venom. Tell me what … what she would _want_, and I'll do it. I'll stop her heart before it happens, if you tell me to. It will kill me to do it. I will _beg you_ to end my life when this is over. But I will not let this happen unless she _wants it_."

He's shaking his head rapidly. _No. No. This can't be the answer. She can't become one of you. I need more time. There should be more time. _ A keening sound comes from deep within his chest, echoed by the whimpers of the animals circling us.

In my arms, Bella suddenly arches, her muscles tensing. Jacob gasps, his mind filled with hope. _She's okay. Look! She's moving! She's okay._

"She's not okay, Jacob," I yell at him, full of agony and frustration. "It's starting! She's about to be in the worst pain of her existence, and then her heart will stop beating, and her eyes will open and it will be forever. She will be one of us forever. _Tell me what to do!_"

Bella cries out, her eyes still closed, mindless, writhing. I clutch her to me, wishing my cold skin could provide her even an ounce of relief.

He's staring at me, and his eyes are pleading, begging me for another answer. _Any _other answer. And then he looks down again at Bella. In his mind's eye, she's not lying here pale and brutalized in the snow. In his mind's eye her face is flush with color and her eyes are dancing and she's happy. _She's so happy_. She's sitting on a tractor tire, doing her homework, and she's laughing. She's pulling a face at him over a burger. She's leaning in to him watching a movie. He is cataloging a thousand quiet expressions, a hundred chaste touches. She's wearing the jacket I've just torn from her body, lying against him in a tent. _This isn't about Edward anymore_, she's saying_. You're right, he broke my heart._

The pain at her words tears right through to my very soul.

"Very well," I manage, finally, no louder than a whisper.

Bella's whimpers increase in volume, and she's tossing and turning in distress. I press a kiss to her fevered forehead, and I place my hands around her delicate neck. I can feel the flutter of her pulse under her too-thin skin. The tiny, fragile bones of her neck. My hands start to tense.

Jacob knocks them away in fury, grabbing both my shoulders and spinning me to look at him. "_SEE THE REST!_"

I'm shaking my head, unwilling to let her bear a moment's further torture. Unwilling to bear even a moment more of my own. But his thoughts are aimed right at me, impossible to ignore. Bella's in the tent, her woolen hat pulled low over her ears, and her eyes bright with emotion.

_Being with the Cullens, _she's saying, _I've never felt stronger, more real, more...myself_. I hear her voice, through his ears. I feel the love, emanating from every word. _I want a future with them. I want an eternity._

It's enough. God, it's more than enough. It's more than I could ever have hoped for.

Jacob shoves me back a little, and I relinquish, letting her go, letting him lean in to press his own kiss of farewell to Bella's cheek. His tears fall freely, his heart aching. I reach for his hand, taking it in my own. I want to thank him, but it seems wholly inadequate. He looks up at me, taking in a shuddering breath. "This is what she wanted," he manages, finally. "Don't ever let her regret it."

He pushes up from the ground in a rush, and he stalks away to rejoin the pack.

I fold Bella back into my arms, and she bucks and cries as the burn of the transformation courses through her body. I want more than anything to take her miles away from here. To tuck her between cool sheets in a bed in one of our cabins. To press damp towels to her brow.

Sam and Jacob and Paul lift the heavy, wounded body of Seth into the air, and proceed to carry him down the track ahead of me. The wolves circle and follow.

I'm alone in the clearing with Bella and her torment. She struggles in yet another paroxysm of pain that I can do nothing to relieve. I have so few options right now: carrying her, running. I search desperately for a way to make this work, and every time I come back to one answer. One reason that makes it all completely futile.

A reason that steps from the trees in front of me.

Demetri.

"Come, Edward. Now we take the girl to Caius."


	23. Decide

I lift Bella in my arms as I stand. She's in so much pain, thrashing against me and moaning, even as her mind stays completely silent. I press her gently against my chest as I walk, trying to still her movements and whispering quiet words of reassurance into her hair.

Demetri says absolutely nothing. His thoughts are awash with confusion. He's replaying the events in the clearing over and over, turning it around in his mind and trying to understand it. Thinking about different orders Aro has given him over the centuries. Calling everything into doubt.

We take our time, moving slowly down the rocky trail, each lost in our own thoughts as we retrace our steps.

The scene that confronts us on our return is very different to the one we left. Dawn reveals the true extent of the devastation in the clearing. Broken rocks and tree limbs; the smoldering embers of the bonfires that have destroyed the bodies of the newborns. Dirty streaks of exposed mud cross the snow. In the center, Felix and Alec stack logs to form two enormous funeral pyres upon which Jane arranges the bodies, her thoughts a dark, crumpled mess of loss and betrayal. Sulpicia has collapsed into Athenadora's embrace, weeping helplessly, face buried against her dark robes.

My family is with the pack, crowded around Seth's body. He is still in wolf form and still not moving. Carlisle has one ear pressed to his chest, his hand running through Seth's fur, as he confers quietly with Alice. As soon as I step from the trees they move instantly to my side. Esme cradles Bella's head, prizing gently at my fingers to get me to release her. Every instinct rebels. I want to press her fragile body to me, closer still. To keep her safe; to never let her go.

_Oh __Edward, __let __me __take __care __of __her,_ Esme pleads, her heart full of a mother's compassion for both a son _and _a daughter, guiding me to lower Bella to the ground. Alice clutches at Bella's hand, her gaze far away, searching for something. Anything. Bella sobs, but doesn't open her eyes.

Rose and Emmett are both full of questions. How this happened; if I am the one who bit her. I see myself through their eyes. My Volturi robe torn and disheveled; my skin streaked with dirt and Bella's blood. It's a horrific sight. I want to be able to reassure them but no words seem to come out.

Carlisle helps me to my feet. "There is little we can do now but wait." He murmurs softly. "Hopefully Alice will soon be able to give you some idea of how long." His expression is conflicted, desperately worried about what I've been through. Today. All the days before this one. He squeezes my arm briefly.

"How is Seth?" My voice sounds flat and distant, almost as if it is someone else who is asking. I can't comfort him. Can't offer any of them the answers they need.

_Badly __wounded.__ In __some __ways __it__'__s __a __blessing __that __he __is __unconscious __and __unable __to __phase.__ I __think __he __will __heal __faster __in __this __form._

Jake kneels at the young wolf's side. He looks up briefly, taking in my appearance. His glance shifts to where Bella lies, her cries subsiding to whimpers. The devastation that takes over his expression is too much for me to bear. I look away.

Renata and Chelsea stand side-by-side, both of them utterly lost. Aro was their reason for existing. He gave them purpose and status; a sense of self. As I take in the thoughts of the assembled Guard, I realize it's true for almost all of them. Near the tree line, Jasper is sitting with the newborn, Bree, trying to explain to her what has happened here today. An exercise in futility if ever there was one.

"I warned Aro." Caius' voice is brittle with grief, as he strides toward me across the snow. "I told him he would regret having someone around who had free reign over our thoughts." _Rummaging, __like __a __thief._ _Some __things __are __better __left __buried._

"I hadn't understood the way in which our..._priorities_...had diverged, my brother and I. It seems that, over time, his primary concern was that there be unity among us. It seems that Aro's quest for loyalty began to overcome the paramountcy of the law."

This conclusion seems to be for the benefit of the Guard. Caius and I both know that it wasn't loyalty that drove Aro. I think back to the first night I spent in Volterra, to Caius' own words: _Aro__'__s __fascination __with __your __gift __has __blinded __him __to __the __law._

"Aro didn't understand that the bond between mates can surpass even the most powerful of ties," Caius continues. "He didn't understand because he was never forced to choose. Look at you: covered in the blood of your singer; without having tasted a single drop."

_Marcus __understood.__ Aro __made __him __choose, __and __suffered __the __consequences._

I nod in confirmation. Caius has a much better grasp of what has unfolded here than he is prepared to let on to those around him.

He turns to face the vampires of Volterra, the thin morning sunlight shattering like bright diamonds across his face. His voice is now clear and strong. "We are nothing without the law. I return to Volterra to continue to see that it is upheld. Those of you who choose to return with me must do so freely."

He points a pale, bony finger at Chelsea, who raises her chin even as her lip quivers slightly, betraying the terror she feels.

"And if _you_return, Chelsea, you do so on the understanding that your gift will never again be used in this way. Serving the Guard is an honor and a privilege. It will never again be compelled."

Her shoulders slump in visible relief, clutching at Renata for support.

Caius looks back to me, ruby eyes blazing. "You kept your bargain, Edward. You stayed with us and served us in exchange for Bella's life. The last of her blood flows into the ground behind you, and so I release you from your commitment."

All the air leaves my lungs in a sigh. This was never the way I wanted to earn my freedom. From the very first moment I realized Bella had followed me to Volterra I wanted to avoid this very outcome. The victory seems hollow; the price we have paid far, far too high.

Caius turns to consider the Quileute, most of whom are still wolves crouching low on their haunches. Behind them, Carmen and Eleazar are trying to reason with a bedraggled-looking Irina. She is out of her mind with fear and humiliation.

"That leaves us with the matter of the alliance between this coven and the wolves, and the death of Irina's mate," Caius announces.

My heart sinks. _This __is __not __over __yet_. Irina is stumbling out of Eleazar's grasp, wanting to somehow atone for what has happened. Planning to throw herself on Caius' mercy and plead that she was mistaken, or beg that he take her life instead. She is without reason, prepared to throw herself on the funeral pyres themselves. Carmen catches her wrist and holds her.

If Caius has noticed the scuffle, he doesn't let on. He continues to weigh up his options. Ordering the Guard to strike down the family and its allies is risky. He knows that they are wounded and battle-sore, but he has no way of knowing what state the wolves are in or how quickly they heal. The numbers are still evenly matched. That wouldn't matter, with Jane and Renata at his disposal, but a quick glance reveals both are suffering deeply. He has no guarantee that either will do as he commands. He also knows that I am listening. _Giving __the __order __reestablishes __my __authority, __Edward.__ The __Guard __respects __a __wartime __leader._

Panic rises in my chest, thick and suffocating. Jasper looks up in surprise at the change in my emotional state.

I don't know what to do. To run; to argue with him; to fight.

And then I see it. A short burst of clarity in Alice's second sight, like clouds parting after a storm. She gasps. I bite my lip, too afraid to hope. Too afraid to trust the vision. But then it's happening. Right in front of us. Just as Alice sees it.

Sarah steps forward, unpinning her robe and letting it fall to the ground. Her face is determined, her posture confident.

"You're right, Caius," she says. "The bond between mates can surpass anything, even reason. Irina came to you out of love, but she made a mistake. Laurent was in the wrong. The wolves acted to protect Bella. The Cullens have done nothing to bring your judgment down upon them."

Caius listens to her words, taking in the determined set of her shoulders, the abandoned robe pooling around her ankles. His mind muddies and shifts at her supernatural intervention, a frown marring his pale forehead. Sarah does not blink.

"Go back to Volterra, Lord Caius. Uphold your law. This coven and its allies are not your concern."

Her scarlet eyes do not break contact with his. A long silence stretches through the forest; abruptly shattered by a guttural moan from Bella. My heart aches to go to her. Like everyone else, I remain frozen in place.

Caius' mind finally clears, like sediment settling in water. I let out the breath I am holding as I see his decision.

"Our work here is done," he announces curtly. "We mourn our dead, and we leave."

Sarah gives me a small, tight smile. _It __is __enough __for __now, __I __think? _I give her an almost imperceptible nod, gratitude rolling off me in waves.

"Light the pyres," Caius calls, and Felix and Alec both crouch to set fire to the kindling and underbrush. Tongues of flame lick up around the heavier logs, tendrils of smoke rising in the crisp mountain air. "Carlisle?"

Carlisle steps forward to stand at Caius' side. In the still of the morning, his voice carries, tolling like a bell. "Requiem æternam dona eis, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat eis..." The vampires lower their heads. At first it seems a dreadful caricature of human worship, but in their thoughts I see nothing but respect and a desire to do what they can to send the Volturi brothers to their lives in the next world, whatever might await them there.

"Te decet hymnus Deus, in Sion, et tibi reddetur votum in Ierusalem..." Carlisle intones, the ancient language flowing easily from his tongue. The fire takes hold, reaching the dark robes wrapped around the bodies and flaring briefly as the fabric incinerates. The thick stench of the burning corpses fills the air. Sulpicia lets out a strangled cry. Jane turns and stalks from the clearing.

"Exaudi orationem meam; ad te omnis caro veniet. Requiem æternam dona eis, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat eis."

Eternal rest. Perpetual light. Not the domain of the vampires of this earth.

Caius turns to Carlisle, drawing him into a tight embrace. "Be well, brother."

"And you. It is a lot of responsibility to rest on one set of shoulders," Carlisle cautions.

Caius nods. His mind gives me comfort that he understands this, at least for now. He looks at me. _Bring __your __bride __to __Volterra __when __she __is __ready, __Edward.__ I __should __like __to __meet __her._For the first time, the idea no longer fills me with dread. It is neither a command, nor a threat. I nod.

"Which of you intends to leave us now?" he asks the group. Jane has not returned. The others remain silent, looking at one other for direction. Sarah raises her hand. "I wish to stay here in America," she says, matter of fact as ever. "I wish to spend some time with Edward's family." Caius nods, unsurprised. Demetri is the only other mind that wavers, albeit briefly. He settles on returning to Italy for now, and seeing how things will play out.

"Very well. Let us depart."

As the sentence is spoken, so the Guard disappears. Melting silently into the trees, like thunderclouds rolling back to reveal the sun.

In the stillness that follows, a wounded wolf begins to stir and whine, and my _dying beloved_ cries in anguish.


	24. Awaken

I die a tortured death and am reborn in the flames of hell, and it continues to happen _over _and _over _and _over _again.

My eyes are screwed shut, and my body arches and twists against the pain, even as moving only the slightest amount makes it so, so much worse.

The world is nothing but black and red. The searing agony a thousand times more severe than when James' venom had flown briefly into my veins. This is all-consuming, all encompassing. Hurting from the roots of my hair to my toenails. I can feel every inch of my skin charring, feel it sliced apart by razors.

Unceasing. I scream helplessly, crying out meaningless sounds. Trying to convey that I need this to end. _I need someone to end me_.

One infinite moment of unrelenting pain.

Seconds; days; eons. Time stands still. Well past the point at which I can endure anymore, I cry and weep and scream and beg for it to be over.

Gradually, so slowly that at first I doubt my sanity, I start to sense the smallest changes. When my fingers clutch and tear at what's beneath me, suddenly I can still them. _Sheets? A bed? Where am I?_A tiny amount of strength returns. A gradual fraction of control.

The sound of my heart rises up and thunders in my ears. I'm able to pay attention to it for the first time, to think of something other than just the scorching pain. My heart sounds frantic; too swift. Uneven. As if I've been running as fast as I can. Running from a death I have utterly failed to escape.

Then I can start to separate touches. A hand on my wrist; an attempt at a soothing sweep across my brow. _Nothing _soothes. There is no cooling and no respite from the inferno burning through my limbs, melting my bones.

I can start to distinguish sounds. Over the unnatural thump of my pulse, voices start to emerge.

"It's nearly over. You need to go."

"I don't know..."

"Look, we _think _the scent is a strong enough deterrent, but we can't know for sure. She's going to be ravenous. Any beating heart in a nearby radius is at risk."

"Jake, come on. We can test this theory later when she's...later, okay man?"

Familiar. Not familiar. Close. A thousand miles away. My ears play tricks on me.

"Bella? Can you hear me?"

I want to answer _this _voice, but to open my mouth again is impossible. I am the inside of a volcano. I am the center of a forge.

"It won't be long now. God, Edward. Look at how beautiful she is!"

"How can you..."

"The wolves. When they get far enough away it starts to clear."

I can't comprehend why I am anything more than a smoldering pile of ash. Feeling is starting to return to my limbs, no longer lying like useless dead logs. I can separate out voices; the sound of movement. _Close. Far away_. My perception is skewed.

"She's really going to be okay..." he says, finally, with a relieved sigh.

I don't believe the words, but I desperately want to believe that it is Edward who speaks them. _Here. At my side._

The pain inside me starts to change and recede, drawing back from the edges of my consciousness. Relinquishing its grip over every facet of thought. But as it pulls in toward my core it starts to concentrate, flaming and flaring in my chest. My heart begins to beat even faster. The pain centers itself there, a torch that burns brighter with each erratic pulse. The noise becomes impossibly loud. The agony drowns out everything. My back arches at the crescendo. I try to scream and can't.

One final staccato beat. I collapse back to the ground. _Silence_.

I open my eyes.

"Bella." His voice is a benediction. My name leaves his lips like a song. His palm against my cheek, no longer icy and hard. It's really him. So much more flawless, more stunning, than my frail human sight ever had the capacity to understand. _Edward. My Edward._

A tidal wave of sensations threatens to overwhelm me as I try to catalog my surroundings. I'm lying on a daybed in the Cullen's home. Bright afternoon sunlight is pouring in through the glass wall, causing the dust motes to dance and shimmer. I can see every one. Someone has dressed me. Jeans that aren't mine. An impossibly soft cashmere sweater that I think is Alice's. I can feel every point of contact between the fabric and my skin, all at once. I blink rapidly. Alice and Edward are sitting on either side of me. Around the room, watching me with caution and hope and curiosity and wonder: Esme, Carlisle, and Eleazar. Elsewhere in the house I can hear Carmen conferring with a woman whose voice I don't recognize. Garrett is outside on the back lawn speaking with yet another stranger. Jasper sits in the corner, his expression intense and focused entirely on me, a scarlet-eyed girl crouching beside him.

Panic flares within me. I look around, try to hear. _Try to count_.

"Where...?" My voice is like the tinkling of crystal. Light, musical. I'm so surprised by the sound of it I can't finish the question.

"Shh, everything's okay," Alice assures me, giving my hand a squeeze. "Every _one _is okay."

My eyes dart around the room for confirmation.

"Emmett and Rose are covering our tracks in the forest," she clarifies. "The fight left a lot of damage. They're dismantling the remains of the bonfires, crushing up broken trees and rocks and scattering them. Peter and Charlotte left this morning. They needed to go further afield to hunt."

My human memory is hazy and vague, but something tugs at the back of my mind. "Seth! Is he..."

"Injured, but recovering well," Carlisle says from across the room. "Jacob and Sam only left here shortly before you awoke. The pack is fine." He doesn't raise his voice, but I can hear him as clearly as if he had just whispered it directly into my ear. The lack of perspective is disorienting. I realize that while the pain has disappeared entirely, a new, uncomfortable burn has started up in my throat.

I look back at Edward. His face is guarded, unsure. I have a thousand things I want to say to him, and not a single word will come out. His dark green shirt and jeans are from before, but nothing about him seems the same.

"I have so much to ask your forgiveness for," he says, the bright light of his countenance clouding over with guilt.

I shake my head, sitting up. The movement is unexpectedly swift. Before I've even thought about it, I'm upright. It's too much. Too soon. I am so flooded with sensation, with feelings and sounds, and color like I've never seen. Overcome that he is _here _and _alive _and _safe_. I can't think about his need for forgiveness. It's too difficult to process the fact that I can feel every thread of the cotton sheet beneath my fingertips. To wrap my mind around the insistent tug of my parched mouth.

"Don't," I whisper, and his face falls. "Not now. Not...here."

I look over at Jasper. My new eyes take in the scars that ravage his neck and jaw. It is so hard to believe that he could have survived so many sets of teeth ripping into his throat.  
>How many vampires had tried to kill Jasper? Hundreds? Thousands? <em>How many of those scars are new?<em> "The army?"

"Dead, other than Bree here. She's...changing her ways." His mouth twists a little in a wry grin. The brunette beside him beams, her red eyes shockingly bright. I feel self-conscious. Mine must look the same way; wholly out of place among the golden-eyed Cullens. I swallow hard to clear my ashen throat. It doesn't help.

"It's over, Bella," Alice promises, giving me a wide smile. "The Volturi are gone. Aro and Marcus are dead. They won't be back."

_Edward is free?_

He runs a hand through his hair, a thousand different shades of bronze, the sunlight bursting off his pale skin. Hesitating, he eventually takes my hand in both of his. I am shocked that our skin temperatures are now the same. His touch is electric. "How are you feeling?"

I realize that my transformation has done nothing to open up my mind to him. I consider his question. The thirst starts to burns through me like a low-grade fever. Scratchy; insistent. I swallow repeatedly hoping for it to ease, but nothing happens.

"It's...uncomfortable, but...manageable. For now."

Jasper lets out a breath. I wonder how much effort he has to exert to keep my emotions in check.

"There are things we need to decide," Esme says gently. "We'll need to take you away from here, for quite a long time. We need to know whether you'd rather your father think that you died in the forest. A camping accident, maybe an animal attack." She doesn't even flinch at the irony.

"This has got to be your choice, Bella," Edward insists. "No one is making it for you." Unspoken is the promise that he won't ever try to do so again. "If you want to see Charlie in the future, we'll find a way. We'll make it work."

I try to imagine that. What could possibly account for being unable to be near him for the next few months or years? Some sort of unexplained contagious illness? I have no doubt that Carlisle could arrange that. Airlift me to a medical facility in Switzerland, only able to talk to Charlie over Skype. And what would the future hold? Never being able to share a meal with him. Wearing stage makeup to appear older; contacts to disguise my eyes. And for how long before the reality made it impossible? Before I would really have to say good-bye forever.

Edward traces slow circles on the back of my hand with his thumb. His expression is searching and intense. "You don't have to make up your mind right now," he murmurs. "We have a little time."

Jasper disagrees. "Not a lot of time. Bella needs to hunt, and we need to take her away from here, regardless of what she wants to do. We should have moved her while she was changing. We were due back from the camping trip first thing this morning. You don't think Charlie's going to come over here soon and find out why she's not home?"

The fire in my throat rages at the mention of hunting, even as I shudder a little at the thought.

Edward frowns, about to object to Jasper pressuring me, but I stop him by squeezing his hand. "It's okay. I've made my decision."

I look to Alice, whose gaze comes back into focus after a moment. Edward cheats instantly, his expression concerned.

"Alice..." I press.

"Sorry. It's just. I'm not sure how much to tell you. You know none of this is set in stone."

"Please."

"I'm not going to lie to you, Bella. The next few months will be very hard on him. He's devastated that he has no body to bury. He spends a lot of time out there looking for you."

Sorrow wells up deeply inside me, my overwrought emotions threatening to overtake me.

"But, the Quileute look after him. They help him search for you; eventually convince him to stop. Encourage him to move on..." She trails off, looking at Edward for reassurance. He shrugs slightly.

"Alice!" I plead.

She sighs. "He _remarries_, Bella. I wasn't sure if you'd want to know that. But he remarries, and though he misses you all the time, he finds a kind of happiness. Your mother too, in her own way."

I drop Edward's hand and wrap my arms around Alice in a tight hug. "Thank you."

She wriggles a little, and lets out a tiny, "Ouch!" causing me to release her instantly. "I'm so sorry, I didn't think..."

"It's okay," she smiles. "You're just a lot stronger than me right now."

I marvel at the thought.

"So, you're okay with this?" Edward asks softly. "This is what you want?"

"I hate that he'll be hurting, but really I can't avoid that whatever I do. I just think this is better. Everything else is too risky. Charlie's a cop. He's suspicious of everything and everyone." I think about the Volturi, unable to believe that much will change, even with two of them dead. "I don't want him in any danger because of me."

Eleazar and Carlisle walk over to join us.

"We've been discussing what we do next. Now that Bella has made up her mind, we should get moving. Carmen and Eleazar have suggested you join them in Denali."

"Irina wants very much to have the opportunity to make amends," Eleazar says to Edward. My mind races. All I can recall is that the sisters wouldn't come when we needed them. Now it seems there is more to it than that. "Extending our hospitality to you is important to her." Edward nods.

"We will join you when an appropriate amount of time has passed," Carlisle continues. "Esme will be too heartbroken after Bella's 'accident' to remain long in Forks."

Eleazar crouches at the foot of the daybed, staring at me closely. I feel uncomfortable under his scrutiny. "Interesting," he murmurs finally, getting back to his feet.

Edward looks up at him in surprise. "What did you just call her?"

"A shield, I think. She's blocking me now, so I can't be sure."

I stare at Eleazar, my brows furrowing in confusion. Shield? What does he mean by _blocking_?

"A shield?" Edward repeats, also bewildered.

"Come now, Edward! If I can't get a read on her, I doubt you can, either. Can you hear her thoughts right now?"

"No," Edward murmurs. "But I've never been able to do that. Even when she was...human."

"Never?" Eleazar blinks. "Interesting. That would indicate a rather powerful latent talent, if it was manifesting so clearly even before the transformation. I can't feel a way through her shield to get a sense of it at all." The look he gives Edward now is almost exasperated. "And apparently completely unaware of what she's doing. Totally unconscious. How ironic. Aro sent me all over the world searching for such anomalies, and she only comes into her gift after his death." Eleazar shakes his head in disbelief.

I shudder at the mention of Aro's name. "What are you talking about? What does that mean?"

Eleazar examines me again. "I suppose we were overly formal about it in the Guard. In truth, categorizing talents is a subjective, haphazard business; every talent is unique, never exactly the same thing twice. But you, Bella, are fairly easy to classify. Talents that are purely defensive, that  
>protect some aspect of the bearer, are always called shields."<p>

It takes me a few seconds, despite how quickly my new brain works, to think about what he means. "Aro couldn't hear me, though I was human when we met. Jane tried to hurt me, but she couldn't."

Eleazar's eyes widen. "Powerful, indeed."

It's a satisfying feeling, to have some sort of explanation for my differences. To not feel out of place among these people.

Carmen comes into the room with another striking woman. Her eyes are gold, and her hair almost silver, it is so pale. Carmen kisses both of my cheeks, before stepping back. "Bella, this is Irina."

Irina's expression is anxious, almost downcast. She is unfathomably beautiful, even among the women in this room. She says nothing.

Carmen unfolds a map on the coffee table, and indicates a trail north to Edward. "Take Bella to hunt, and we will meet you somewhere near here. If you head this way, you will stay far from any settlements. It should put you at the lowest risk."

It takes me a second to realize what she is saying. Edward needs to keep me away from humanity. _I am now the threat_. I look up at Esme and Carlisle. I hate that once again I am about to be the cause of separation in the family. That after so long on his own in Italy, Edward must once again leave them.

"Maybe you should stay," I whisper to him. "I could go with Carmen and Eleazar." He looks aghast; heartbreak washing over his features, his shoulders slumping a little in defeat. "No, no. I mean...I thought...maybe you wouldn't want to be separated from your family again so soon," I rush to explain.

Hope lights his eyes. "Bella, I don't want to be separated from _you _again so soon."

His words fill all the empty spaces within me.

He gives Alice a questioning look, tracing the route on the map again with his finger.

"Oh, damn it!" she curses, abruptly. "Not now."

I hear it just before I sense the tension roll out among the assembled vampires. Edward's hand suddenly tightens on my wrist. A low, wet sound. The heavy thudding of heartbeats. Jasper hisses, getting to his feet and stalking to the front door. He looks at Edward, who gives him a sharp nod, before wrenching it open. Instantly, the scent hits me. Something tangy, and irresistible. Delicious. Something I need to have.


	25. Devote

**This is it, dear readers. Last chapter, with a short epilogue to immediately follow._  
><em>**

* * *

><p><em>Instantly, the scent hits me. Something tangy, and irresistible. Delicious. Something I need to have<em>. But it's buried in an animal smell so foul, so unappealing, that it wrinkles my nose.

Jake steps through the door. His jaw is clenched and his arms folded. I hear the soft pad of paws outside and realize the other heartbeats I hear are wolves.

"Carefully, Jacob," Edward says. A snarl from the driveway echoes the concern in his voice. "Maybe this isn't the best way..."

Before he can finish the thought I'm pushing up off the bed and sweeping towards Jacob, pulling easily from Edward's futile grasp. Jasper crouches in front of Jake defensively, ready to spring, but I wave him away. "It's okay. I'm okay," I give Jake a small smile. "They're right, you know. You really do smell _terrible_."

A relieved laugh escapes his throat, and he takes two steps toward me, scooping me up in a hug. I try to reciprocate as little as possible, terrified of hurting him. "And with those eyes, you look like a freak show, Bells," he whispers against my hair. "But still so beautiful."

He releases me and steps back to look me over again, letting out a low whistle. "You still look like you, sort of. Maybe it's not the look so much as... you _are _Bella. I didn't think it would feel like you were still here." He smiles at me again without a trace of bitterness or resentment anywhere in his face.

Comfortable, eventually, that I am not going to start snacking on my friend, the others go back to preparing for our departure. It's strange to be able to hear the strands of conversation taking place all over the house at once. A low hum that I need to learn to tune out. Jacob and I take a seat together on the sofa.

He's agitated, fidgety. I can't tell if it's being in the house on his own with all these vampires, or just my new alien appearance. The wet thump of his heartbeat is distracting, making my throat feel thick and dry despite the awful odor.

"Everyone is really okay?"

He nods. "Seth's doing better every day. The rest of us got off lightly, considering. And the pack is even bigger than before!"

I realize what he means. All these vampires. It was always a risk that more of the young Quileute would find themselves responding to the ancient threat in the way of their tribe.

"Who is it this time?" I ask, trying and failing to remember the boys of the Reservation.

"Leah. She phased for the first time the night of the fight."

"Leah's a wolf!" I gasp. My memories of her are murky and unclear. I am discovering that thinking about my human life is tricky. Things I should know seem to be just out of reach. A fleeting image surfaces of Jake in the tent with me, talking about Sam breaking Leah's heart.

"Yeah. It shocked everyone," Jake chuckles. His leg bounces up and down anxiously, and he twists his hands in his lap.

"What is it?" I ask, placing a hand on his knee to still it. "Am I making you nervous?"

He shakes his head, looking up at me. His dark eyes blaze. He takes a deep, steadying breath.

"It happened, Bella," he says, all in a rush. "As soon as I saw her. It's like, once she phased all the pieces of the puzzle fell into place. I got back to the Rez that day, and as soon as I got out of the truck and saw her...that was it." He pauses. I'm not sure what he means.

"I imprinted on Leah."

I stop breathing. Jake frowns; trying to gauge my reaction before pressing on, his words a nervous jumble. "I guess...well, I guess we imprinted on _each other_ actually. The elders don't know what to make of it. And Bella, it was every bit as they described it. I was _crazy _to think I could have defied it. She's...she's _everything._"

All the emotional language I have to describe my feelings no longer applies. My heart no longer 'swells' or 'breaks' or 'aches', lying stone-cold in my chest. But seeing the depth of emotion Jacob places on just that one word: _everything._I realize I need a new vocabulary.

I pull him to me, as gently as I can. "I am _so happy for you_," I swear against his neck, reveling in the heat of him against my skin. I have never meant anything more sincerely.

His grin breaks wide across his face as he pulls back. "Thank you, Bella."

Jacob. My Jacob. Who picked me up, and put me back together, and loved me, and taught me that I was _worth _loving. Who made me think about my choices, who made me _want _to make my _own _choices. Seeing him this happy is the best gift I could receive.

"You're leaving?" he asks, finally.

"Yes. I need to..." I can't bring myself to say it to him. The ravenous bloodthirst feels like a terrible secret; something that will disgust him. "We need to leave. Jake, you have to promise me that you'll take care of Charlie."

His expression turns to sadness. "Are you sure this is the best way?"

I nod firmly. "I'm sure. Alice thinks it's going to turn out okay. I just need to know that you'll look out for him in the meantime."

"Like my own flesh and blood, Bella."

Jasper comes back into the room. "I'm sorry, Bella, but we really need to get going. I can only dampen your thirst for so long, and Alice thinks Charlie will be coming soon."

We get to our feet, and Jake hugs me again, tucking my hair behind my ear as he steps back.

"I love you, Bella. That hasn't changed."

I kiss him on the cheek, managing only a choked and emotional, "Ditto."

He closes the front door behind him, and I hear the sound of human footsteps switching abruptly to paws as he runs for the trees.

Edward comes up behind me. "Are you okay?"

I turn to face him, pressing both of my palms flat against his chest. He rubs his hands up and down my upper arms, but doesn't draw me to him. Still so hesitant.

"I'm fine," I assure him. "Thirsty. I guess it's time to do something about that."

"Give me a moment?"

When I nod, he walks across the room to speak with another blond vampire who has just come down the stairs. She is thin, but athletic looking. Her features are striking and her eyes a dull scarlet. They use a hushed tone, but I realize it's meaningless to my new senses, every word is crystal clear. Privacy, it seems, is now just a convention.

"You're sure?" Edward asks, placing a protective hand on her shoulder. An irrational pulse of jealousy surges through me. I have no idea how they know each other or what they have been through together, but it is clear that Edward cares for her a great deal.

The woman nods. "You know I'd never cope with your diet," she teases with a smirk. "Garrett lives much the way that I'm used to." They fall silent for a time, but Edward's chin drops to his chest with a shy smile that suggests she is still talking to him. He looks up again with a questioning expression and calls Jasper over to join them.

"Sarah and Garrett are offering to take Bree," Edward explains.

"It seems safest," Sarah says. "I can convince her to behave while we take the time to teach her. "

Jasper seems torn. I think all of the Cullens would prefer to see one less carnivore in the world, but they already have one newborn to contend with in me.

Bree tugs at Jasper's sleeve. "I'd like to go with them," she says in a small voice. "It will be hard for me to change, and I'd like Sarah's help." Jasper acquiesces, squeezing her shoulders comfortingly.

Garrett comes down the stairs shouldering a small pack and tying back his hair with a leather thong. "We'll look forward to seeing you again in the future, Bella. Hopefully under brighter circumstances." And in an instant, the three of them are gone.

Carmen, Eleazar and Irina quickly follow. No good-byes. Just swift acknowledgements that we will all soon be reunited.

Farewelling the family is harder. "It's going to be no time at all," Alice promises, clutching at me fiercely. "We'll be there so soon."

Esme smoothes my hair and tugs at my sweater. "Look after him for me," she murmurs. And it seems a crazy thing to say when I will be so utterly dependent on him, but one look at his anxious expression and I know exactly what her mothers' heart is trying to convey.

Emmett and Rose pull up just as we step outside. I find myself apologizing to them repeatedly. "I'm sorry you have to go to all this trouble. That you have to be uprooted all over again."

Emmett chuckles. "I _love _polar bears. Denali's no hardship."

Rose smacks him lightly on the arm in feigned irritation. "Besides, Bella," she says, winking at me. "Forks High really wasn't my scene."

"Now," Alice says, a stern note of caution creeping into her voice. "It's time."

"This way," Edward says quietly, taking my hand. "Let's run."

We head around the house and through the backyard to the edge of the river. Edward lets go of me and takes an effortless jump to the other side. As he waits for me to join him, I start to comprehend the raw power in my muscles. This new body of mine feels capable of _anything_. Almost before I form the thought, I am hurtling through the air and landing lightly at Edward's side. His smile is blinding. And then he disappears through the trees

Running with Edward is unlike anything I've experienced. My limbs do not tire, my balance is flawless, no risk of stumbling or hitting a tree. Just the crisp mountain air on my face and the scent of the forest, _rich _and _damp _and _lush _and _green_. The myriad sounds around me: wind dancing through the trees; a mountain stream bubbling over rocks.

And _suddenly_that same wet, thumping sound.

My throat flares. I'm moving before I am even aware of it, downing an elk that has stopped to drink from the brook. Snatching it from the ground before it can finish swallowing. The taste of it feels off somehow, but the blood is _warm _and _wet _and _soothing_, spreading like a glow throughout my entire body. All too soon, the carcass is dry.

I drop it in disappointment, kicking it away from me. I look up to find Edward is sitting on a rocky outcrop nearby, watching me with a smile.

"I probably could have done that better," I confess with embarrassment, looking at the blood smeared on my hands and jeans.

He chuckles. "You did fine. How do you feel now?"

"Still thirsty. How is that possible?"

"You're a newborn, Bella. Your thirst is going to take a long time to manage. That's why we're leaving."

I begin to grasp the enormity of that thought. The elk was dead before I'd even realized it was nearby. If that had been a hunter, or God forbid, _Charlie_. There would have been no way to stop.

I wash my hands and face in the stream, leaping out effortlessly and sitting down next to Edward. The scent of him is so comforting I want to bury myself in his arms and never leave.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," he says quietly, his voice ragged, like broken glass. "I should never have left you here. I thought if we disappeared from your life that you'd be safe. Instead, I put you in even greater peril."

He left me for all the wrong reasons, that much is true. But I'm not the Bella he abandoned on the forest floor. Not even close. Everything I've been through has shaped me in ways it will take him a while to understand.

"I thought I could protect you by staying in Italy." His voice carries such pain. "I have never been more wrong."

"Don't," I whisper, taking his face in my hands. Marveling at the silk of his skin under my fingertips. The depth of his gaze. I am trying to think of some way to convey my meaning to him. Right now, in this moment, with the sound of the forest stretching out around us, maple leaves scraping together, the smell of earth and rot and moss, I feel no sense of urgency. He and I have all the time there is left to talk, and forgive, and teach, and explain. None of it is necessary right now.

"Edward, your whole life you have always known what the person in front of you is thinking. How they feel; how their experiences are shaping their decisions. That means you've _always _been able to act accordingly. You've always had all the information you need." I am unable to resist touching the soft, copper hair at his temples. It's so hard to believe that after everything we've been through, we have finally made it to this point.

"When you left here...and when you stayed in Volterra...you thought you were doing what was best for me. You _guessed _and you made assumptions." His golden eyes drift close in a slow blink of acknowledgement. He looks saddened by my conclusion, but he doesn't disagree.

"But, Edward, I was just as bad. I was so...dazzled...by you that I never told you what I _wanted _or _needed_. I couldn't believe that someone like you would ever want to be with someone like me. So I always assumed the worst."

He looks for a second like he might be about to protest, but he holds his tongue.

"I don't know what happened to you when you left Forks, or what you've been through in Italy with those monsters. But I know that while you were gone I _grew _and I _changed _and I _loved _and I _lost_. I'm not the person you left behind, Edward. Just as you're not the same person who left. And now? Today? _None of that even matters_.

"This is my first day, Edward. There have been no days before this one."

I close what is left of the distance between us. The kiss is chaste, his lips impossibly soft against mine, my fingers in his hair. The world folds in on itself. There is nothing but him and I, this moment, this touch. When I draw back, I realize neither of us is breathing. Edward is staring at me with such love and such _wonder _that I don't feel like I can move. I don't ever _want _to move.

"Then, Bella Swan," he murmurs softly, pulling me closer still, his arms impossibly warm and strong around me. "I would like to spend your first day, and your second, and every one after that, getting to know you. I plan on falling in love with you all over again."


	26. Epilogue

My favorite place in the cabin is the porch swing. I teased Bella when she asked for one, saying it was a terrible cliché and that she'd never use it. She stamped her foot just once and said if I wouldn't build it for her, she would do it herself.

Now, six months on, I'm big enough to admit she was right.

Kate came by this afternoon bearing mail, air-freighted copies of some newspapers and the New Yorker, and I haven't moved from the swing since. Autumn is settling in around us and the trees are black and skeletal in the long red shadows of twilight.

I hear her before I see her, moving swiftly down over the ridge line and bursting through the trees. Her eyes are a dark ruby, even when she's fed. It won't be long now before they change for good. Her face is flushed from the blood moving through her system, hair escaping from the tie that keeps it back. She looks wild, ecstatic. Absolutely breathtaking.

She springs up the steps in an urgent blur, pressing a gentle kiss to my forehead.

"Hey, old man," she teases. "Enjoying your swing?"

I snake an arm around her waist and drag her down into my embrace, nipping lightly at her neck. She giggles, snuggling into my arms and kicking off her boots so that she can tuck her sock-clad feet up beside her.

"Have fun?" I ask, drinking in the scent of her, letting it curl around and settle over me. Every inhalation is a homecoming.

She nods, leafing through the pile of mail and skimming a postcard from Jacob. "A couple of black bears," she murmurs, distracted. "Did you read this?"

I shake my head resting my chin on her shoulder to study Jake's loopy script.

"Are you okay?"

She turns her head to look up at me, and I'm relieved to see that she's smiling. "Sue Clearwater! That's a good sign, Edward. It means Alice was right!"

Her enthusiasm is contagious. I pull my arms tightly around her, shifting her body to lie against mine.

"We've had an invitation." I tug the thick cream envelope out from behind the cushion. She takes it from me curiously, extracting the hand-engraved card within.

A frown mars her flawless features as she reads Caius' words. "How do you feel about this?" she asks.

I try to pull my scattered thoughts together. Her beauty and the feel of her beside me is endlessly distracting. "It will be another few months before you can travel. We don't have to decide right now. "

She nudges me in the ribs as she chides me."That's not what I asked you."

I've spent the last hour trying to work out what to tell her. It's been hard to speak with Bella about my time in Volterra. To describe the fear; the crushing sense of powerlessness. The death and destruction that I witnessed. The daily struggle to hold onto the faintest memories of her in the face of Chelsea's influence. It seems a universe away from the rich saturation of having her _here _and _safe _and _alive _in my arms.

"I don't ever really want to set foot in Volterra again," I manage, finally. "But I think maybe we should make a courtesy call, while we're there."

I lean in to capture her mouth, kissing her deeply. After a beat she pulls back, her long lashes blinking in confusion. "Wait...what do you mean 'while we're there'?"

I give her the folder I've had tucked away for a couple of weeks now. She turns the glossy pages eagerly, her mouth forming a perfect O in surprise.

"It's called Castello di Velona," I explain. "It was a 12th century watchtower in Montalcino."

"Edward, it's a castle!"

I chuckle. "It's a medieval fortress. And now it's a luxury hotel. But when we're there we'll be the only occupants."

She pores over the pictures of the stunningly restored building on an exposed hill overlooking the Val d'Orcia. Even from the photos, you can tell the views will be stunning. "Edward," she breathes. "It looks incredible. You want to go on vacation to Italy?"

Her eyes are bright with excitement. She has never looked more beautiful.

"Not a vacation, exactly," I smile, taking a deep breath. "Bella, I've lived over a century on this earth, but I've only truly been _alive _these last months with you. You're the inner reaches and the outer edges of my existence. It's only with you at my side that eternity has come to have any meaning."

She tugs at her lip; a gesture that is a last remnant of her lost humanity, one that reminds me of the fragile teenage girl with the pale heart-shaped face who so thoroughly captured my soul.

"Bella, I expect to ask you this question many, many times in the years to come. I hope the answer will always be the same. Will you marry me?"

The smile that dawns over her face is brighter than any sun.

"Edward, I will marry you in a medieval castle," she whispers, her voice full of delight. "I will marry you on a beach. I will marry you right here on the porch of the cabin that you built me." She covers my face in tiny kisses; my stone heart is fit to burst. This amazing woman, who taught me that love is more than laying your life down for someone; it is living your life _with _that person. This woman, who faced down fear, and loss and heartbreak, and who did it all to stand by _my _side.

I kiss her back, as the sinking sun touches its last rays across her, transcendent. And with all my heart, I silently thank Carlisle's mysterious God that a creature like me can ever have been so fortunate.

* * *

><p><strong>This story owes everything to littlesecret and emmajanepringle who put up with me on gchat, and to katinki01, MissRebecca, xtothey, bookjunkie1975, DarkBlueBella, musicdaydreams and emavalexis, who all recced and pimped it like mad. <strong>

**I am so grateful to a very loyal bunch of readers, who have stuck with me through every delay and every cliffhanger, and sent the most encouraging reviews. I hope that in the end it was what you'd hoped for.**

**xxx**

**HJ**


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